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A Faerietale

A Faerietale

Once

Long ago
Far away

There was living
A beautiful Princess
In a castle.

Unfortunately at her birth
A wicked faerie godmother
Bewitched the new babe
Making her quite dumb

Until a knight or prince
Should come to her aid
Fall in love with her,
Give her a first kiss
At once breaking the spell.

This maid was so very lovely
That men came from all around
Standing in awe of her beauty.
When they found she was dumb
They went away shaking their heads
And seeking women who could speak.

The poor princess grew very sad indeed
That none of these men wanted her
When they discovered she had this impediment.
Her father, the King, became more desperate
As the years passed and no man came
Who would accept her for herself alone
Or seek for her hand in marriage.

One day a handsome Prince rode from afar
And, approaching the castle, sought to be admitted.
The King gladly gave him leave to enter
And received him kindly, the Princess seated beside,
(As the Queen, her mother, was long deceased.)
The Prince bowed gracefully and kissed her hand.
As he rose, he looked into her eyes
Perceiving her soul. He immediately fell in love.

In the calm of evening the Prince and Princess
Strolled together in the privacy of the castle gardens
Among the beautifully scented and colourful beds of roses.
The Prince spoke to her of his home country,
His own parents and his people whom he loved.
The Princess was silent and neither answered nor spoke
For she could not but reached out her hand
And plucking a deep red rose from its bush
moved towards him fastening it lovingly to his jacket.

He took her in his arms and holding her closely
Bent his mouth towards hers and kissed her pliant lips.
Immediately, the spell was broken and she uttered three words,
The first words she had ever spoken in her life.
“I LOVE YOU” were the words she spoke so softly,
not as a whisper but murmuring gently to her love
who fell to his knees, clasping her hands in his
and asked if she would become his wife and mistress
thus making him the happiest man in the entire world.
She blushingly assented and the King gladly gave his blessing.
~~~

PS: Now, all you young maidens, come listen to me.
If you gaze in the eyes of your loved one, you see,
and keep silent, don’t prattle on incessantly
wedding bells may ring faster than in fantasy.

Heathcote Giffen, January 24th. 2005.

Author notes

This is an extension of Poetryality's new form in that, in addition to the progression of lines, there is progression in the number of words contained in the lines. In this case from one to ten. I hope this will not DQ me.
I have read "We Are Blessed" by Samplette and
"I Think" by fairygurl
Written January 23rd, 2005

Sorry about the black background but if I change it I lose the kiss border. Just DQ me.
Happy Valentine's Day to all.
Heathcote, February 3rd. 2008.

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 18 of 18
  • imahealer
    February 12, 2008
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    Love The New Form

    A cinderella story of the handsome prince. A challenge to write, and I can see in her contest, you did exceptionally well. Happy Valentine's Day, Heath! ARe you "dumb" as I will rescue you, and kiss your (what kind of lips), just to hear you say "I love you". I fear that might be the only "I love you" I get! LOL

    Shana


  • Terry-too silver member
    February 11, 2008

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    I don't think I qualify to comment on your poem but I enjoyed your humour all the same!

    Terry


  • MargaretG
    February 8, 2008

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    It seems to me that the best marriages have one who talks and one who listens - and they change roles from time to time.
    I like this story, it has a classic setting and an interesting complication. We can forgive the black background because of its theme (though some may not read at all because it makes their eyes sore).
    Cheers, good luck!


  • Hinemoa silver member
    February 6, 2008

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    My dearest Heath, I have loved this poem of yours since you wrote it. It's sooo beautiful. I LOVE IT!
    Love from Hine.


  • jenelda silver member
    February 5, 2008

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    Dear Heath, This is GREAT! I LOVE IT! Very much, what a beautiful story. Good luck in the contest.
    Love Jen.


  • Maureen silver member
    February 4, 2008

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    Well-written poem..enjoyed the faerietale! I've always been relatively quiet..maybe that's why I'm married today. (It still pays to hold my tongue.)

    BEST of LUCK in this contest! Congratulations on winning Silver in poetryality's contest!



    <3 Maureen


  • angelica silver member
    February 3, 2008

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    Dear Heath, I love this Faerietale and I'm pleased you chose to enter it in our huguenauties contest. It's a wonderful love story for valentines day.
    Love AJ


  • Sandygram silver member
    February 7, 2005
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    CONGRATULATIONS on winning the silver, this was a wonderful delightful poem. A pleasure to read. Take care, Sandy


  • Heathcote silver member
    February 6, 2005
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    Dear Renee,
    Thankyou for your kind encouraging words.
    Sincerely, Heathcote.


  • poetryality silver member
    February 6, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    This is so beautiful! The story unfolds with great delight... to know that this fair princess simply needed someone to believe in her, a nice strong embarce, and a gentle kiss. "I LOVE YOU" are the most spoken words in any language and when they are spoken in earnest, the most delightful to hear. EXQUISITE STORY/POEM Thanks for the P.S. I do agree.

    You followed all of the requirements and delivered a fine Progressive Form. EXCELLENT!!! Thank you so much for this entry.

    Renee ♥


  • Sharon Corr gold member
    February 4, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Heathcote
    I love you a fairytale inscribed on the winds of time
    A deeply hidden moral within your divine lines
    The moral is to love at first sight for love is light
    The feeling you have when you’re in love is always right
    I'm held captive by this wondrous story in all its glory
    I love how you held me from the beginning until the end
    You left me with such a sweet taste of love upon my lips
    May I kiss, you now in one cerise red rose of a thousand kisses
    I'm a fool for love songs that whisper in my ears
    As you lift all of us in your tender heart and your tears
    Wedding bells may chime still I see the love in your eyes
    May I call you a new old friend in time?
    As I dance so lightly in your space beyond time
    Still you love us beyond the miles
    Above the time trials
    Bravo to this wonderful song of your heart and soul.

  • Acetylene wishes
    February 4, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    quite an impressive form and structure, the adaptation of hte predescribed structure has made this very interesting indeed. Congrats on such a good write and story poem, must of taken quite a while to perfect


  • Keith
    January 25, 2005
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    If only life were like this....Good build up of words, and I really hope they live happily ever after.


  • January 24, 2005
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    Full of all the things that make up a good fairy-tale. I enjoyed it.


  • Samplette gold member
    January 24, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    This is certainly a creative and clever rewrite of "Sleeping Beauty" Very nicely done.
    I wish you the best in the contest.
    Sam

  • angelica silver member
    January 24, 2005
    Edit | Reply

    I loves it, I do, I do

    AWWWW heathcote, what a beautiful story, you are really such a romantic at heart and you are very endearing, I can see you are going to have a lot of ladies following you. I love this and don't take any notice of Hugh, I like your work .
    Good luck in the contest~Joan
    Applause


  • hugh wyles silver member
    January 23, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Dear Heathcote,
    Apart from sloppy punctuation and really rough meter in your PS:, (which I told you to alter and I'm pleased to see that, for once, you have taken my advice) this is a really good poem/story.
    I don't know, however, whether my dear friend Renee will appreciate your mucking with her original form by adding progressive words. I did tell you not to be such a smart-ass!
    Well, be it on your own head if she DQ's you. Applause anyway.
    Regards, Hugh.
    Edited on Jan 23, 8:45 p.m. because ''.


  • SusanL
    January 23, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Oh Heathcote -
    What fair maiden would not swoon for the love of a prince. Alas if they could just be strck dumb long enough to not make complete ninnies of themselves...
    I love the progression of your tale! and I am sure the addition of words as well as lines will greatly enhance your chances, but one will just have to wait and see.
    Susan

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