So the girl is sitting there one peaceful day
In the park or some such lovely place
and the birds are chirping overhead
So she smiles, and drags out her notebook
to write what she has to say
About love and hate, thoughts on life
and the strife of living day-to-day
But with shock she finds no words to say
No words to fill the barren page!
No simile, metaphor of any kind
Nothing in the whirlwind of her mind
Snatches of this, stirring her head
But they're nothing useful
Just poems long dead
And the shock wripples over in waves
The thoughts of having nothing to write
and no hint of words in sight!
So the girl, as her tears fill up the page
drops the pen, where it hits the ground
and shatters into a million pieces
And the paper weeps without a sound
And this girl sits shocked, unmoving
Frozen to a bench suddenly cold
As the chirping birds turn into crows
and they take away her beloved ink
Piece by piece and shard by shard
Leaving her with a life so hard
Because what is there with nothing to think?
Without her words, and nothing to say
the sky is just a cloud of grey
Until the notebook'll fly open
and the pages'll fly out
And the silky poems of another day
will kiss the clouds and crows away
And bring happiness, a different way
Author notes
It doesn't rhyme nor does it have real rhythm, but it is my attempt to get through what is turning to be writer's block from Hell. So I'm just sitting around being my weirdo self and I think "what would happen if i could never write again?"
And so I get this one line in my head, drag my butt out of bed in the middle of the night to write it, and there's the rest.
Not really fantastic, but hey, I was manic. At any rate, comments would be fully appreciated and replied to, as always. Thanks for reading,
Amanda
Written January 19th, 2005
What did you think
Comments
1 - 35 of 35
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Thanks so much for the comment on this, and I'm sure glad you enjoyed it. No problem about the comment,
Amanda -
I love the way this rhymed, but still told a story.
Very nicely done!
Also wanted to thank you for your comment on crayola personalities.
~Shel~ -
The way I thought of it, the girl just lost her ability for words. Couldn't write. Maybe because she took it for granted? I dunno.
Though as for other interpretations, I like your ideas. I'm always up for people interpreting my poems in other way. Nothing's worse than a poem that doesn't give you freedom to think.
Thanks for the comment,
Amanda -
Poem was well written, theres so many ways this can be interpreted, is she in so much pain she cant write? does she just feel numb? Its a great way to write a poem. It flowed perfectlly and it wa slike someone was actually tapping into me as i read it, a great narrative within it, congrats.
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Thanks so much, I'm glad you liked it enough to comment.
Amanda -
I think it's sad she couldn't find the words and her lonelinesss with out her words was deeply felt, it was very vivid. It did rhyme just not at every part. beautiful.
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I have to thank you a thired time for all the wonderful comments. They've been uplifting. I'm so glad someone is really enjoying what I've written.
I know the flow was interrupted in parts here, but I'm glad you think it was alright. Thanks so much for the input, once more,
Amanda -
I still love your work, and I've run out of things to say to express my excitememnt about the poems and the stories.
It doesn't matter that it didn't rhyme, it had such a great flow and it was great in the descriptive departement.
FallenLeaves
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mhm, and then you just HAVE to haul out of bed and write it, because you know it'll be lost forever if you don't. But hey, good ideas tend to come that way, so I don't think I'll complain much.
Hey, glad you seem to be enjoying what I write.
Amanda -
luv what u write.. It's happened to me. Trying to sleep when some weird thought comes into mind and I have to get up and write it.
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Yeah, frustrating isn't it? Thanks for the comment,
Amanda -
Nice. I hate when I can't find the words to describe something especially if that something is how I feel!
God Bless
kassie -
Youre welcome
and I thank you again for your comment.
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Haha,I was in a thought overload of sorts, so I can see how you might see lots of thoughts in it. Glad you found it unique and enjoyable. Thanks so much for the comment,
Amanda -
nice poem
This is very nice. Not the kind of poem I see often so it is good as a change . Even though it does not rhyme or have rhythm you still wrote this very well. You really showd lots of thoughts in this. Nice poem.
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lol, I'm really glad you liked it. It's a trick I've tried before. When I have writer's block, I tend to write about it. Thatnnks for the comment,
Amanda -
Hehe...what an interesting way to deal with writer's block - by writing another poem! This is really funny. I like it a lot, even though it doesn't fully rhyme. Great write!
~Elsie -
I'm really glad you liked it, seriously. Mayhap writer's block is God's way of saying "open your eyes". Telling you to look for fresh inspiration maybe. I didn't really think of that earlier. huh.
But at any rate, thank you for the comment.
Amanda -
GREAT
I like it...I can identify (sort of)(except I force myself to structured writing when I feel blocked). I decided that in the moments when there seems like there should be words...and the there are no words, you are suppose to find a different gift in the moment that the page is blank. Just smell the grass and commit the song of the birds to your memory for another day. -
MMM, yeah, I believe maybe it happens to us all then. Writing does of course involve skill, but sometimes there seems to be something in it that you can't teach yourself, and that's what seems to leave. It's coming back though, slowly but surely.
Haha, no problem about spelling. I knew what you were saying at any rate.
Amanda -
ah, writers block. tha bane of my existence.
you followed one of the best cures though, write about it.
if you are passionate about writing, i don't think it can ever leave you, mine took a loooong hiatus but the words are coming back, and i'm sure your's will too.
(sorry for the zillion spelling errors in this comment, can't seem to spell today
)
~Clare -
reee: Well thanks much then. Write on? It's in the plans.
Take care,
Amanda -
Dr. John Celes: But have you ever had those moments when you want nothing more than to write, but the words just don't come out? That's what I was struggling with, and that's what I wanted to express here. That, and the fear that the words might never come again. Irrational, but a very real fear. Thank you very much for your comment, I appreciate what you had to say.
Amanda -
haha, yeah, writer's block happens. I might try checking that out sometime, if I don't get all manic and forget.
Um, yeah, I think I may have hit the delete button on this before I hit reply. I tried to stop it before the command went through, but if your comment ends up deleted, that's why. Thanks very much for commenting anyways, I'm glad you seemed to think it pretty good,
Amanda -
blaze453: I'm really glad you liked it. The ending does seem to be the most popular part, it was one of my favorites too. Thanks for the comment,
Amanda -
Excellent write.It speaks for itself.Write on Jim
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good message
the best of poems come only in the inspired moments!the right words come only in that inward flash of mind and heart,working in close harmony!trying to write poetry uninspired and mechanically could sometimes result in the above sordid situation that is very well expressed by the writer!Such instances do occur very often.but are transient.poetry writing improves with continued attempts to pen more and better poems.but if the words don't flow from the heart, one cannot write even a single good line of verse!Write when the heart is enthused and observe and ponder when not!This is the cycle of the poet's progress!good write. -
Without her words, and nothing to say
the sky is just a cloud of grey
Until the notebook'll fly open
and the pages'll fly out
And the silky poems of another day
will kiss the clouds and crows away
And bring happiness, a different way
beautiful ending to a wonderfully written poem. thank you for sharing!~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~Love and Light~~~~
~~Blaze~~ -
Oh how nice of you to stop by and comment dear .
Glad you like it hon, I figured after being realist for awhile I wanted something with whimsy in it. hah, whimsy is easy when you're manic
Love ya hon,
Amanda -
MANDA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That was spectacular....writer's block has never been so beautiful! I especially love the last three lines...they run together so flowingly...this poem was very unique....you did a wonderful job expressing yourself and a wonderful job with wording...but you always have a nack for that....I love you Manda, keep up the good writes...TTFN
Blessed Be,
Jill -
I'm glad that you say it as something different, it's nice to hear it's not quite cliche now and then, huh? I'm also very glad that you liked it, enough to stop by and leave a comment. Thanks much.
Absolutely no problem about commenting on your poem, I enjoyed it a lot.
Amanda
Your spelling looks fine to me, BTW.
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"Without her words, and nothing to say
the sky is just a cloud of grey
Until the notebook'll fly open
and the pages'll fly out
And the silky poems of another day
will kiss the clouds and crows away
And bring happiness, a different way"
I have thought this same thing (in a different way of course) several times. Writing is a way for many of us to express ourselves, or help us clear our mind. I thought this was great, and a very different poem from some that I read. Fabulous really. Thank you much for commenting on mine. I really appreciate that alot.
Despair
(Forgive me if my spelling is a bit off) -
Haha, it's back now though, so all is well. Except my dorky dumbness.
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DELETED!
Comment really fast!
You know how ironic this poem is? All about how you can't figure out what to write, and instead you write about not being able to figure out what to write? I guess uninspiration can be really good inspiration. I liked it, I think you're on your way back from the writer's block from Hell
You get more applause for deleting the comment -
Haha, well, if anything you can turn uninspiration into something of substance, no?
I am trying to get back, it sucks being uninspired.
Thanks for the comment hon, you get kudos and applause for being the first one,
Amanda
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