I'm trying hard to forgive you, but it's difficult inside
so much pain you caused my life, all along you lied
I go to sleep each night and i pray to God above
Please forgive my anger and bless me with your love
I know God will forgive me, i know this to be true
But first i must do something, I have to forgive you
Tears are falling endlessly, I'm trying to be strong
I hate you for the things you did, i know this feelings wrong
For how can i continue to hate then ask God for his love
I know i'm wrong inside my heart as i pray to God above
I understand we all do wrong and deserve to be forgiven
You broke my heart and soul, it's been hard to go on living
You lied to me and cheated, I wish we never met
But God won't take the hurt away or just let me forget
You see i know the truth and what I now must do
God says to be humble, I need to forgive you
Let go of the anger, let go of my pride
Let go of the hatred, I need to heal inside
Forgive you for the pain, forgive you with my heart
God says love your enemy and that's where i must start
I'm struggling inside, i'm fighting with my soul
But i believe in God and i know he has control
So every night i pray to him forgive me for my sin
Show me how to overcome the conflict that i'm in
Tears are falling endlessly, God blessed me long ago
His love was always there for me and this i've always known
He's forgiven me for all my sins, my anger, and my pain
I've always known what's right, i need to do the same
So standing here in faith, I forgive you in my soul
God knows this already, I just wanted You to know
Author notes
"Love is Kind"
Written January 17th, 2005
A contest entry
- just have fun by .
550 points, ended March 8, 2005, 33 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Please please PLEASE don’t get offended here, this is a WONDERFUL Poem, however, there are a few bumps and skips I would like to go over with you.
I'm trying hard to forgive you, but it's difficult inside
So much pain you caused my life, all along you lied
I go to sleep each night and I pray to God above
Please forgive my anger and bless me with your love
I know God will forgive me, I know this to be true
But first I must do something, I have to forgive you
Tears are falling endlessly; I'm trying to be strong
I hate you for the things you did, I know this feelings wrong
For how can I continue to hate then ask God for his love
I know I’m wrong inside my heart as I pray to God above
I understand we all do wrong and deserve to be forgiven
You broke my heart and soul; it's been hard to go on living
You lied to me and cheated, I wish we never met
But God won't take the hurt away or just let me forget
You see I know the truth and what I now must do
God says to be humble, I need to forgive you
Let go of the anger, let go of my pride
Let go of the hatred, I need to heal inside
Forgive you for the pain, forgive you with my heart
God says love your enemy and that's where I must start
I'm struggling inside; I’m fighting with my soul
But I believe in God and I know he has control
So every night I pray to him forgive me for my sin
Show me how to overcome the conflict that I’m in
Tears are falling endlessly, God blessed me long ago
His love was always there for me and this I’ve always known
He's forgiven me for all my sins, my anger, and my pain
I've always known what's right, I need to do the same
So standing here in faith, I forgive you in my soul
God knows this already, I just wanted you to know
Ok there’s yours, I will start at the top, well actually, first off, ( Just because I thought it was ironic, while I read this over I noticed I didn’t cap this I
)--> I know the shift key sticks a lot, I have that problem ALL the time, however it would look a lot better if all the "I"s were caped.
First, lets take a look at this section:
I'm trying hard to forgive you, but it's difficult inside
so much pain you caused my life, all along you lied
I go to sleep each night and I pray to God above
Please forgive my anger and bless me with your love
I singled this out because it’s perfect
Just thought I would let you know. Up to this point it is absolutely wonderful. Well, let me correct that, I would suggest taking the extra "I" in the line: "I go to sleep each night and I pray to God above" I would take out the I before pray and after and. It makes it flow a little better. 
NEXT!!
“I know God will forgive me, I know this to be true
But first I must do something, I have to forgive you”
Hmm, this is the first bump, read it to your-self, does it sound right? I am trying to think of a better way to state this with a better flow...How about:
"Forgiveness is a virtue, that I must give to you,
To get forgiveness from our god, you must get it too"
Hmm, VERY difficult, and I can see why it came out bumpy. If you happen to notice, it has the same amount of syllables, really helps it flow
NEXT!
Tears are falling endlessly, I'm trying to be strong
I hate you for the things you did, I know this feelings wrong
Because of the correction that needs to be made below we will have to change this part L Drat.
“Drips are falling endlessly, but I try to hold the tears,
Hating you for your deed, that lasted all these years.”
That helps not run the rhymes together.
NEXT!!
For how can I continue to hate then ask God for his love
I know I’m wrong inside my heart as I pray to God above
Hmmm, again, the message you are sending is just fine, however this parts a real mess : /
Lets see, how to tweak this…How about:
“As I pray to the Lord, I know that I am wrong,
How can I ask for love, while hating all along,”
There, I know its not the same end rhyme however I felt that it was not possible to keep that rhyme and still make good sense.
NEXT!
I understand we all do wrong and deserve to be forgiven
You broke my heart and soul; it's been hard to go on living
Umm, no rhyme scheme? Is that done intentionally?
“We all do wrong that I know, and forgiveness has its place,
Broken heart, broken soul, while life has slowed its pace,”
NEXT!
“You lied to me and cheated, I wish we never met
But God won't take the hurt away or just let me forget”
Good try here but a simple correction, because of the little speed bump in there:
“You lied to me and cheated, I wish we never met
But God won't take the hurt away, won’t let me forget”
( helps the flow)
NEXT!
You see I know the truth and what I now must do
God says to be humble, I need to forgive you
Let go of the anger, let go of my pride
Let go of the hatred, I need to heal inside
Very debatable here, the first two lines anyways, as for this line: “Let go of the hatred, I need to heal inside” Try removing the “I need” part, so it comes out: “Let go of the hatred, to heal inside”
“Let go of the anger, let go of my pride
Let go of the hatred, to heal inside”
Flows very well now.
NEXT!
“Forgive you for the pain, forgive you with my heart
God says love your enemy and that's where I must start
I'm struggling inside; I’m fighting with my soul
But I believe in God and I know he has control
So every night I pray to him forgive me for my sin
Show me how to overcome the conflict that I’m in”
WONDERFUL! I was tapping my foot to this! Very well written and I praise you! VERY good!
NEXT!
“Tears are falling endlessly, God blessed me long ago
His love was always there for me and this I’ve always known
He's forgiven me for all my sins, my anger, and my pain
I've always known what's right, I need to do the same
So standing here in faith, I forgive you in my soul
God knows this already, I just wanted you to know”
I like the repeated use of “tears are falling endlessly” But this does not have any rhymes at all, is that intentional? If it is please forgive me, however I am about to teak it to rhyme and flow:
“Tears are falling endlessly, God’s bless is plain to see,
Always there is his love, he pours unto me,
He's forgiven me for all my sins, my anger and my pain,
So now I must do the same for all that I can gain,
Standing here in my faith, I forgive you in my heart,
As God sits back lovingly, watching my fresh start.”
That was hard, chose the one you want.
Here is how it comes out with all my modifications:
I'm trying hard to forgive you, but it's difficult inside
so much pain you caused my life, all along you lied
I go to sleep each night and pray to God above
Please forgive my anger and bless me with your love
Forgiveness is a virtue, that I must give to you,
To get forgiveness from our god, you must get it too
Drips are falling endlessly, but I try to hold the tears,
Hating you for your deed, that lasted all these years.
As I pray to the Lord, I know that I am wrong,
How can I ask for love, while hating all along,
We all do wrong that I know, and forgiveness has its place,
Broken heart, broken soul, while life has slowed its pace,
You lied to me and cheated, I wish we never met
But God won't take the hurt away, won’t let me forget
You see I know the truth and what I now must do
God says to be humble, I need to forgive you
Let go of the anger, let go of my pride
Let go of the hatred, to heal inside
Forgive you for the pain, forgive you with my heart
God says love your enemy and that's where I must start
I'm struggling inside; I’m fighting with my soul
But I believe in God and I know he has control
So every night I pray to him forgive me for my sin
Show me how to overcome the conflict that I’m in
Tears are falling endlessly, God’s bless is plain to see,
Always there is his love, he pours it unto me,
He's forgiven me for all my sins, my anger and my pain,
So now I must do the same for all that I can gain,
Standing here in my faith, I forgive you in my heart,
As God sits back lovingly, watching my fresh start.
Edited on Mar 18, 3:21 p.m. because ''. -
Excellent Work!
Wow, great work! Don't know why, but it almost brought tears to my eyes Not only is forgiveness good for our own well being, but it also puts us in good standing with our Father Incredibly sincere and strong emotions were felt throughout this piece. It is truly a gem Keep writing and take care
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This is amazing. Forgiveness is a hard thing to do, but I really love how you were able to incoporate God in your poem...awsum! -TV
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This is só precious!!! The flow, the rythm but above all the truth all part and parcel of this beautifull poem!
Edited on Jan 18 because ''. -
very powerful poem! sad very sad you can feel your hurt as you read your words. i wanted to readh out and hug you and help you through this. i hope things go alright for you. glad to see you writing again,you've been missed
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You have a great point of veiw in this and this poem flows very well..keep up the good work
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graceful and insightful
Sometimes we need to forgive, be forgiven, and allow ourself to forgive ourself..If we cannot forgive how can we exp[ect to be forgiven when we want to be? There is a saying:"You dont forgive someone because they deserve it. You forgive because YOU owe it to yourself to be capable of it."
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