Peas and carrots• Show poetry

i been through a lot and i think that my poetry shows that.

when i was 16 i "fell in love" and we had sex.
it was my first time and i got pregnent.
he rejected me and left,
but he came to the hospital just to yell about how he wasn't the father.
Mika was born on april 18 2004.
she was 2 months early and her lungs were underdeveloped.
she died 4 monthes later.
he came to the funeral too, but he was so shitfaced i about died.
we havent spoken since.
i have now been involved with another man for almost a year now.
in fact he came with me to her little grave last year on her birthday.
we found a rose and a note there:

             "To My Baby Girl,
                i am so sorry i srewed up,
                i miss you,
                you were so pretty like your mama,
                will you ever forgive me?
                        -With Love-
                             Papa"


that was the lowest feeling ever.
hindsight is 20/20 though.

needless to say love it not my strong suit.
like 13 of my boyfriends have ended up gay.
soo, i have been dubed a " fag hag " lol
which is cool i guess

i go to atherton high school in lou ky
and take it from me
the derby sucks,
i kno i know its one of the biggest horse races in the country but i hate that everyone feels the need to get all pumped up and go to all these events fer like three weeks before the  race even happens.

but i'll prolly end up bein all excited too,
cause i am a huge hypocrite.
like seriously.

i listen to:

  pseodo-punk music
blink 182
sum 41
green day
good charlotte

  and then i listen to my dads music too
tom petty and the heartbreakers
rush
stevie ray vaughn
the who
ac dc

i love math
hate science
really wanna do physics
like english i guess
suck at social studies
love to sing but am not in chorus
take french and suck
wish i had had the grades to go ib

i have a bunch of friends but no one thats really close
because i fear that if they get too close
they they can and will hurt me.
i have major trust issues
and im trying to break it down.

i have lots of odd eating habits
i block eat, which im told is an eating diorder
i love chocolate milk
i like to eat tomato paste plain
i also enjoy dipping pepperoni into tomato paste
i love stirfry, but only when my dad cooks it
i like crab legs
i eat frosting straight on my b-day, no cake needed
i love french toast
i beleive geotta is god (cincinnati peoples know what im sayin)
i enjoy poptarts, but only the normal ones
i crave french fries all the time

so ive put lots of random shit to let yall get a sense of me