Lost and forgotten• Show poetry

My name is Madeline but I go my Madi.
I've had a hard life from my brother commiting suicide to me shooting up drugs and being in and out of rehabs for the last coupple of years...
I struggle day to day just trying to figure out who I am and what I really want in life.
Do I want to go back to the drugs I miss so much or hurt everyone around me because I want to go back...
There is alot of thinking that goes on in this brain of mine even though it dosn't seem like it most of the time because I like to space off and hide in my own little world in my head for hours on end without anyone bothering me.
I'm layed back and I my seem like I don't care much about anything but I really do I just can't seem to figure out how to express what I'm feeling and when.
I have a hard time making friends now that I'm not using...I'm usally called a space case or a crazy bitch...But hey, whatever you know. I guess it dosn't really matter who they think I am anyways...I know I can fit in somewhere in this fucked up world but the only problem is that I can't seem to find the right place...
I don't seem to get along with preps and they could care less about me anyway because I'm not into the whole skin tight clothes that make you feel like you will die before the end of the day if you don't rip them off soon and the druggies don't want anything to do with me and I with them, I seem to get along great with people who don't seem to have money, ride the city bus, and live off of food stamps but my Case Manager says that I shouldn't make friend's with those people...
Who the fuck am I to hang around then?
Well, I'm just talking now so I'll let you move on while I sit and ponder over what I just typed up here.

Peace out.
--Madi