Golden Dawns stories of occult and magick.
Cast list
Aleister Crowley as himself

Shirl (Ms Golden Dawn) as Dion Fortune

Shirl's real Dad as Samuel Liddel Macgregor Mathers

Vic Reeves as Gay Holmes

Matt Lucas as Dr What

Henry Ian Cusick as the Mysterious Beardy Bloke

Brad Pitt as Elijah DeCourt

Angelina Jolie as Elijah DeCourts incessant stalker Cherrie

Mel Gibson as Angus McWurdy the Scottish Poet

All theme tunes and background music written and performed by Led Zeppelin and Deep Purple.
(P.S - theme tune is Stairway to Heaven... by Led Zeppelin)
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The night was cold and still on the shores of Loch Ness - the year 1940 -something (so secret even I am not sure what the date was). It was
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The argument sorted Aleister Crowley continued his great speech. At the back of the room Elijah DeCourt sat intently watching the scene and15 lines, 13 comments, on May 2 3:31 AM 2007
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Crowley was furious. Not only had old rival Mathers interrupted his speech, but now two others were doing it. "Who said that?" He screamed angrily punching the podium and stamping his foot over and over. / "Ich
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Meanwhile back at Boleskine house Aleister Crowley lined up his cronies all in a row as he strutted back and forth. There was Dion Fortune, Gay Holmes, Dr.What, Cherrie, Beardy Bloke and MacGregor Mathers. / &nb38 lines, 3 comments, on May 5 11:21 AM 2007. In Humor, Contemporary
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It felt like he'd been running for hours and Elijah grew weary and shagged out. For a moment he stopped and sat down by a big old tree. It was a lovely evening all the same with a nice full moon and plenty of l23 lines, 4 comments, on May 5 3:24 PM 2007
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Elijah stood gobsmacked and astonished at all these amazing treasures and ancient religious relics he found in Crowley's bag. The Holy Grail, the Ark of the Covenant, the staff of Hermes and the Philosophers Stone. What lu
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On and on the group trekked through the Cairngorms. Crowley looked behind him and saw that on the horizon dawn was breaking. That would make it around 4am-ish and that meant they only had four hours to find Elijah, g
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39 lines, 3 comments, on May 16 3:13 PM 2007. In Contemporary, Adult
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Elijah stepped through the time portal and everything went black as if he was walking through space. He gazed around him at complete nothingness all around him and contemplated what he had done...stepped through an u37 lines, 2 comments, on May 27 4:45 AM 2007
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Comments
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very funny
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Nu -uh!
I see Mel Brooks as Aliester Crowley, Terry Jones in drag as Dion Fortune, John Cleese as Samuel Liddel Macgregor Mathers, Alan Carr as Gay Holmes, Nigelartist as Dr. What, Stephen Wright as the mysterious bearded guy, Salma Hayek as stalker, Michael Palin as Angus McWurdy, and Ben Stiller as Elijah DeCourt. I dunno. That's just who I see.
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Crowley
I did not manage to finish your tales, as I have blocked Adult material, to prevent the corruption of my soul. I was particularly interested, as my father knew Crowley, when he was at Cambridge, full of Fabianism, and the occult. He later had a dramatic conversion to Catholicism, and, I recall, told me a story about Crowley. They were out on a walk - people seemed to do enormous walks in those days, my father also knew, and walked with, Rupert Brooke. As they walked, they came up to a girl walking ahead. Crowley said: "I shall make her fall over", and proceeded to go down a little on one knee, then more, and more and then right down -and down the girl fell! My father was a very truthful man, so , unless one believes this stuff, it is hard to reconcile, save by the intervention of hypnotism, which he himself could do, though I have no idea where he picked it up. He was of a scientific bent, and though he had seen tables dancing around on one leg, with the smell of sulphur, he was well aware that that was trickery. This was around 1907 -1910. Crowley, I think, had dropped out of Cambridge, but plainly hung around. I have long wondered how my father came to meet him. As mentioned, he was a keen Fabian, and I did wonder whether some of the young rebels there, also expressed their feelings by joining what was first the Cambridge Ghost Society, which became the Society for Psychic Research, and whether Crowley was a guest or member.
It is extraordinary to think that in those days, a British Prime Minister, Baldwin, could say that this was the most important area for research of all.


