List: Humor

• Delicate Iron hand **

  Deep in the jungle there is an unusual tribe,
  Their customs and beliefs are hard to describe.

  24 lines, 29 comments, on Feb 7 7:20 PM 2004. In Other, Humor
• My Happy Place

  Disneyland always puts a smile on my face,
  It truly is a magical, happy place.

  37 lines, 38 comments, on Mar 3 1:46 PM 2004. In Humor
• Riding Shotgun **

  Today we finished making our whiskey mash,
  Now we are making a run for a sack full of cash.

  23 lines, 25 comments, on Mar 23 10:59 PM 2004. In Other, Humor
• Growing old *

  Your elbow grinds and so does your knees,
  You are not so old when compared to a tree.

  16 lines, 7 comments, on Apr 5 10:21 PM 2004. In Humor
• Margaritaville ***

  Some days I just want to go to Margarita ville,
  Put my feet up, let my hair down, and just chill.

  20 lines, 19 comments, on Apr 12 12:41 PM 2004. In Personal
• Random Cavity Search **

  Random cavity search, you are the one they pick,
  Into the back room, you learn a whole new bag of tricks.

  25 lines, 25 comments, on Apr 21 11:13 PM 2004. In Humor
• Pedal to the metal

  Out on the highway, my truck is running so good,
  I got a 400 cummins stuffed under the hood.

  17 lines, 16 comments, on Apr 26 3:59 PM 2004. In Personal
• Bigfoot his name is Bert

  Bigfoot lives in my backyard,
  He likes to play scrabble and is good at cards.

  25 lines, 11 comments, on Apr 29 3:34 PM 2004. In Humor
• Queenie

  Quietly going about the business of life
  Understanding, listening to everyones strife

  11 lines, 14 comments, on May 4 12:49 PM 2004. In Love
• I have a pet pig, his name is Earl,

  I have a pet pig, his name is Earl,
  He weighs 1200lbs and has a tail that curls.

  21 lines, 13 comments, on May 13 3:35 PM 2004. In Humor
• Giggling

  Giggling
  Jiggling

  4 lines, 12 comments, on May 17 4:41 PM 2004. In Humor
• A cows life

  Walking around on a slab eating all day,
  Chewing their cud of premium hay.

  25 lines, 52 comments, on May 19 6:59 PM 2004. In Humor
• Wiener Roast

  We lit the bonfire under the evening sky,
  Wieners awaited their fate, prepared to die.

  30 lines, 62 comments, on May 23 10:33 AM 2004. In Society, Humor
• Crazy for chocolate

  Crazy for chocolate, its just my state of mind.

  2 lines, 19 comments, on May 24 10:31 PM 2004. In Humor
• Fin

  Put that thing away, quit waving your fin,
  My patience is getting short, wearing a little thin.

  22 lines, 24 comments, on May 25 9:59 AM 2004. In Humor
• Dynamic Duo

  I want to be Wonder woman, you can be Superman,
  We'll be a dynamic duo, If anyone can.

  26 lines, 17 comments, on May 25 7:32 PM 2004. In Humor
• Chasingtheday

  23 lines, 12 comments, on May 29 9:45 AM 2004. In Humor
• My pet peeve

  Here is my pet peeve, I think you will agree,
  Women that use the toilet, and they stand up to pee.

  20 lines, 14 comments, on May 30 11:20 PM 2004. In Humor
• Fin Fued

  You are just a baby goldfish, with an itty bitty brain,
  Your mouth is too big and you swim with a cane.

  21 lines, 11 comments, on Jun 2 3:14 PM 2004. In Humor
• Eat Desert First

  I want a brownie, no make it a chocolate bar,
  No I think I want peanut butter, I'm going to eat it out of the jar.

  29 lines, 15 comments, on Jun 2 5:56 PM 2004. In Humor
• Well Trained

  Make sure your man is well trained, before you say I do,
  Does he understand he's supposed to cater to you?

  30 lines, 86 comments, on Jun 7 9:06 AM 2004. In Humor
• Cat is delicious, the other white meat, **

  Cat is delicious, the other white meat,
  If you can get it, it's quite a treat.

  20 lines, 27 comments, on Jun 9 3:50 PM 2004. In Humor
• Cabana Boy

  I'm going to get my very own cabana boy,
  He'll do what I say a real boy toy.

  27 lines, 33 comments, on Jul 11 10:52 AM 2004. In Adult humor
• Modern Day Hippies

  Peace sign on my car, one tattooed on my arm,
  I know I smell, I've been working on the farm.

  31 lines, 28 comments, on Jul 12 7:40 PM 2004. In Humor
• Capt 'n Jane *

  I be sailin the Caribbean, you kin call me Capt'n Jane,
  I rule me ship with an iron hand, me crew thinks I be insane.

  26 lines, 29 comments, on Jul 16 3:20 PM 2004. In Humor
• Robin Hood is Hot

  Robin Hood looks so good in tights,
  It grips his everything just right.

  26 lines, 2 comments, on Jul 21 12:12 PM 2004. In Humor
• Scat Master

  The most important job in the circus, I clean up poop,
  I take it seriously, I have my own custom made scoop.

  21 lines, 28 comments, on Aug 26 9:32 PM 2004. In Humor
• Just a little too tight ***

  My panties are stretched a little to tight
  They are riding high, something ain't right.

  16 lines, 46 comments, on Aug 31 10:28 PM 2004. In Humor
• Pet human

  My wiener dog holds a grudge,
  Makes up his mind, he won't budge.

  19 lines, 37 comments, on Sep 12 5:42 PM 2004. In Humor
• Speedo man

  A speedo is essential as part of your swim gear,
  It makes a statement, "Hey look I'm over here."

  20 lines, 28 comments, on Sep 27 10:41 AM 2004. In Humor
• Pumpkin Head

  Bottom of the river I carved my pumpkins face,
  It was really quite a trick just holding it in place.

  20 lines, 27 comments, on Oct 12 4:11 PM 2004. In Humor
• Wrangle your man

  Lessons on how to wrangle your man, please take note,
  Let him watch t.v. but you control the remote.

  27 lines, 32 comments, on Nov 29 11:41 AM 2004. In Humor
• Man Candy

  coconut oil
  pina coladas

  1 lines, 29 comments, on Mar 28 10:31 PM 2005. In Humor
• Tarzans Golden Years

  Tarzan may be the king, but the one in charge is Jane,
  It's a well guarded secret, Tarzan has went insane.

  31 lines, 16 comments, on Apr 12 10:50 AM 2005. In Humor
• Eat Dirt

  Hey you whiny crack whore, you best step back,
  Don't give me no lip, I'll give you a whack.

  23 lines, 26 comments, on Apr 22 8:42 PM 2005. In Adult humor
• Trailer Trash Barbie *

  Barbie you think you're all that and a bag of chips,
  You ain't nothing special, please just get a grip.

  19 lines, 34 comments, on May 8 11:49 AM 2005. In Humor
• Gleam In My Eye

  When I am an old woman, I vow to be hip,
  My false teeth tight and secure, with some denture grip.

  33 lines, 23 comments, on May 29 9:27 PM 2005. In Humor
• Man Whore

  Your man boobs straining against your shirt,
  They are screaming my name, begging to flirt.

  22 lines, 25 comments, on Jun 9 9:22 PM 2005. In Adult humor
• Soggy Bottom *

  Once upon a time there was a tired old hag,
  She could drink wine all day out of a mylar bag.

  24 lines, 16 comments, on Jun 27 9:26 PM 2005. In Humor
• All He Is Worth

  Favorite bodily function, I like to spit,
  My husbands favorite is taking a shit.

  20 lines, 26 comments, on Jul 2 10:47 PM 2005. In Humor
• When Choosing Your Man

  When choosing your man, look at his teeth,
  Check under his hood, look underneath.

  26 lines, 68 comments, on Jul 11 9:28 PM 2005. In Humor
• An Old Hippy

  Went into a little store, I was dying of thirst,
  There was an old hippy in there, the smell was the worst.

  20 lines, 18 comments, on Jul 28 11:01 PM 2005. In Humor
• Chocolate Covered Cherries ***

  Chocolate covered cherries, I could eat them all day,
  Sweetness dripping down my chin, delicious, what can I say.

  24 lines, 24 comments, on Sep 13 7:02 PM 2005. In Humor
• My Own Cabana Boy

  I would like
  To have my

  3 lines, 12 comments, on Nov 4 10:46 AM 2005. In Humor
• Perfect Heist

  I had the perfect heist to the last detail,
  Thought of everything, no way I could fail.

  28 lines, 17 comments, on Nov 7 10:02 AM 2005. In Humor
• Like A Drum *

  Ate too much turkey dinner, I think I'm sick,
  My belly is bloated, I feel like a tick.

  23 lines, 15 comments, on Nov 18 11:07 AM 2005. In Humor
• Please Mr. Farmer *

  I'm begging you Mr. Farmer don't pick me,
  I'm blind in one eye, I can barely see.

  15 lines, 6 comments, on Nov 19 7:08 PM 2005. In Humor
• Shadow

  Yesterday my shadow took me out for a walk,
  Following me around, saying we need to talk.

  19 lines, 11 comments, on Nov 20 8:54 PM 2005. In Humor
• Eating Beast *

  I'm bringing my sweat pants to the Thanksgiving feast,
  Taking no prisoners, I'll be a eating beast.

  20 lines, 21 comments, on Nov 23 10:31 PM 2005. In Humor
• Greasing Up Her Heels

  What did I do to deserve this living hell?
  Knock me down dead, its such a horrible smell.

  19 lines, 19 comments, on Nov 25 8:43 PM 2005. In Adult humor
• Aunt Edna

  Aunt Edna just arrived must be holy Christmas eve,
  Already been a year, I was hoping for a reprieve.

  29 lines, 18 comments, on Dec 24 1:57 PM 2005. In Humor
• Greener Pastures ***

  Hitched to this stage, I'm the lead horse,
  Like the back of my hoof, I know this course.

  23 lines, 17 comments, on Jan 16 9:39 PM 2006. In Adult humor
• Family Tradition

  Family tradition, drinkin homemade shine,
  Burns going down, but it sure makes you feel fine.

  27 lines, 16 comments, on Feb 25 12:02 PM 2006. In Humor
• Do These Tights Make Me Look Fat **

  I think today I will
  Wear new red shoes

  23 lines, 9 comments, on Mar 14 3:17 PM 2006. In Humor
• Eighteen Wheels

  Rolling down the pavement, I got smokey on my ass,
  Eating up the road, my driver pulls out to pass.

  19 lines, 12 comments, on Apr 11 5:00 PM 2006. In Humor
• High Into The Sky

  
  I am invisible every day for three hours,

  22 lines, 9 comments, on Apr 15 11:02 PM 2006. In Humor
• Marking Their Territory

  If women ruled the world, men would sit down to pee,
  Seriously, why do they hose it down for all to see.

  18 lines, 11 comments, on Apr 18 1:26 PM 2006. In Humor
• Smores

  I slipped on my best sausage skin, and started to think,

  27 lines, 15 comments, on Aug 12 11:27 PM 2006. In Humor
• Even Up The Score **

  I am going to wear camo, so the farmer won't find me,
  Every Thanksgiving he goes crazy, goes on a killing spree.

  17 lines, 13 comments, on Nov 2 11:22 AM 2006. In Humor
• Sideways Smile **

  Like a full moon guiding stolen midnight hours,

  41 lines, 15 comments, on Nov 4 10:36 PM 2006. In contest winner
• Velvet Thong *

  Santa likes to relax wearing his velvet thong,
  Makes him feel sexy, even though it looks so wrong.

  30 lines, 1 comment, on Dec 15 11:53 PM 2006. In Humor, contest winner
• Jolly Bloke **

  39 lines, 2 comments, on Dec 18 3:57 PM 2006. In adult humor, contest winner
• Spare The Whip

  20 lines, 4 comments, on Mar 8 11:41 PM 2007. In humor, weird, personal, adult

• By me, right now

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