9-2-2005
Got the results yesterday, seems that the trouble may be in the lymph nodes.
Anyway it means more X-rays, Bone density scan. Then it looks like back to chemotherapy
They tried to control the pain with some new patches but as usual Freda pumped up as soon as they kicked in so she has had to dump them.
Every thing seems to make her sick. They said the may have to put her out for a week while they do the Chemo,
I guess if they want to do the treatment then they will have to, as I remember only to well the last lot she had
. Just a sip of water made her sick,
Her brother was in the hospital on Monday to have the cancer cut out of his leg,
He is now at home resting for a week then its check to see if everything is OK with him Here’s hoping.
Oh well I have her at home for another month, She can't wait to get back to work, but she has to
20/1/2006
Seems like the little Bastard has not finished with us yet.
Just before Christmas Freda was having some pain in her back.. She had gone back to work in August after finishing her chemo. and the first check up all was going well. the blood markers were right down
The second check up showed that the were raising once again, but nothing showed on the MRI scan so they set the next date for Feb, as I said the pain returned before Christmas.
Then it moved to her arm. She took some time off sick.
Then Jan 9th the pain was such that I called out the emergency doctor and insisted that she be admitted to hospital as she had not slept for 4 days and was not eating or drinking.
We got her into hospital right away. where after 9 hrs they gave her something to kill the pain.(9 fucking hours, WHY)
Seems like the cancer may have moved into the area between the shoulders. this was causing the pain and numbness in her arm.
It also affected her left eye, and they thought it may have moved to her brain. but a scan of that seems to show all is OK
The next step is some biopsy's on the swelling in her back, to see if the cancer has moved into the muscle.. if so it is more Chemo for her I think.
She is still in hospital while they get the pain under control which it is not yet but its getting better
Seems like the little Bastard has more fun with us.
Freda's sister ( who died with breast cancer) her eldest daughter was diagnosed on Monday 10th as having Breast cancer, and is to enter hospital for a mastectomy. she is 32 one year younger than my eldest girl Rebecca.
We are all waiting with baited breath to get the results from test they had last year to find out if they carry the gene that is responsible for this.
Oh well we are still laughing at it , but the smiles are getting a little faded.
2/2/2006
Freda had 18 days in hospital while they sorted the pain out
They finally managed to get everything under control and she is now home
The medication means that she is tired all the time so looks like I’m head cook and bottle washer, but at least the pain is now being managed
They did a Biopsy on the muscle between her shoulders and it seem that the cancer has decided it needed a move ,so set up home there.
The out come is more Chemo. beginning as soon as the can set up a line to receive it , as her veins are no good after all the needles she’s has had
She had just good a nice head of curly hair after her last lot of Chemo ( that finished July last year)
So looks like I will have a bald head along side me in bed again.
Ruth my niece goes in for a double mastectomy in two weeks .Then she will probably be on chemo so they may be side by side while having it.
She is taking it really well, She has three young children under 9 so it is going to be a upheaval for her house. But we have told her that if she looks on it the same way as we do she will be able to cope
well that’s about it for the time being
I will up date my journey when time permits
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Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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I have been reading many of your pages and just want to say that I feel so sorry for what you have been through with your family. I hope life will bring ray of light and the good memories will stay with you, you have a lot of strength. My thought are with you and your family.
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I just realised i hadn't breathed in a while. My throught is dry and so are my eyes. You cought my attention. That really hasn't ever been done before.
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Thank you so much for your comments. Please start breathing again I should hate to be responsible for your demise
Take Care
Richard
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Ohhh my...dear Legend as painful as this expereince was for you
& to see each member in the family go through this, I don't think
I can read the next entry..it makes me emotionally sick as well as
depressed...sorry. But I must say you & your family must have
had lots of courage as well as a strong hold of love to see you
through..take care. -
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Hi Meena so sorry to hear about your mother going through this journey.I always thought it was harder to be a loved one going through this than the person with the illness.
I can say no more than be positive That will be the best anyone can do for themselves as well as the one suffering.
It is after all not something that one can alter so fretting and worrying only adds to the pain felt
That you feel you can not read further is understandable.The final entry is both sad and happy though i hope that it shows that despite everything, it was the life lived, and not the final outcome that was the most important message in this journal
Take care
my thoughts are with you and your family
Richard
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Richard, I really don't think I can find the right words to express my emotions at the moment, but one thing is clear from reading this journal and that is the fortitude, fight and love that you, Freda and your family have.
I feel very honoured to be reading this and also a little humbled as it puts my condition in it's rightful place.
Take care
Sue x
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Thank you dear Sue I am sure it was the love that saw us through, and not any such thing as courage perhaps stubbornness is a better word.
As for feeling your condition is any less than what Freda's was, forget it each illness has its own problems and solutions , sometimes not always the ones you want.
In some instances a fatal illness is easier to deal with, as one knows that the suffering will soon come to a close
Whereas some illnesses can seem never ending and take far more out of the sufferer and their loved ones.
Take care
Richard
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Pictures paint a thousand words...so here goes. These are my emotions reading your journal entires at the moment:
I couldn't find the words...
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Thank you Lou the one image you forgot was
I am sure you managed to do this a couple of time when reading As we did so many times while living it
Take care
Richard
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Richard, I don't know what to say. The words seem too little for the amount of the onslaught in your family. I've never understood why they say it is genetic. With the poisons in our food and atmosphere, and the number of people in this battle, there are truths not being acknowleged. How we fare does not seem to be the bottom lline.
Also, I can't begin to tell you the admiration I have for your character and heart.
KLassy
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Thank you Klassy for your comments, we do seem to have had a little aggravation form this disease but i guess some have suffered more, some less.one can only deal with what one is given.
As to the genetic side of breast cancer there is evidence that there is a gene that carries the disease (i think this is bared out with those of my wifes side of the family.This does not mean that if you carry the gene that you will contract the cancer, nor if you do not carry the gene that you will It just means that you could be more susceptible if you do. My wife was the carrier,my girls have yet to get results of their tests
No doubt there are many other factors, such as life style and environment
Take care
Richard
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. 8/11/2007 I see that I last wrote in my journal in February 2006 Much has happened since then. Not all good I am afraid If the year started of bad, it only got worse Early in the year (March ) my mother ( who was 89) had a huge stroke (something she always feared as my father had, had one) she, likon Apr 21 6:04 PM, In Personal. 900 words. → 16 comments, Add one?
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> Oh well been back to the hospital again this morning , to get the results of the last MRI scan and blood tests. The MRI showed little change , but the blood count has risen again, this isn't a good sign, as we were hoping that the change in medication would have brought it down. Next thing is a body MRI son Apr 19 1:43 AM, In Personal. 800 words. → 11 comments, Add one?
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. May 12 2004 Well not a lot to report what’s that they say no news is good news, here hoping it stays that way. The new medication had the effect of making her sick, but we soon got that sorted The anti sickness pills did the trick, and once her system got used to it she knocked the sickness tablets oon Apr 17 7:31 PM, In Personal. 1,000 words. → 6 comments, Add one?
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