Had two sexual encounters on Wednesday with guys I didn't really know. Cut myself again last night, it was worse than last time. But, it was a release. I just want to be held and told everything will be okay! But, I know it's not going to happen. I'm lost, I don't know who I even am anymore.
I feel like one of these days I'm just going to quit caring and I'm going to let go of all the control I have fought so hard to maintain. If that happens, I know someone will end up hurt.
