A letter to the deceased
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- by AngelaAnonyMiss
- © All rights reserved.
Dear Zach,
I miss you and everything you were to me. I miss your smile, your odd sayings, your cute gestures, and your unbelievable talent at making me laugh. You were there for me through so much of my life. Even on that last day you were there... asking ME how I was. I remember everything you said to me that day, EVERYTHING. I even remember how happy I was being back in that spot with you back to that closeness from our childhood days.
Zach... when I think about what you did and how you supposedly never planned it, it hurts me. Do you regret it? After you did it, did you think "Oh shit... no!" or was there a sense of relief? Was it really what you wanted or did you just act on anger and hurt?
I should've known. I should have noticed that look on your face and read into it a lot closer. I should have told you how important you were to everyone including me and promised to call you that night.
Your poor brother. What he saw... it will forever be etched into my brain. It's a nightmare that I can't stop living inside my head. And Im sure it's 100 times worse for him. I closemy eyes and instead of seeing that happy smiling face, I see what he saw... and it kills me inside to know that that was you. My Zachariah Micheal Gerald McDougal.
Everyone claims to have a different piece to the puzzle, some new information that nobody else knows... something that will explain to everyone else, what the truth was. But I know you did it on purpose... the shed was short... if you had any second thoughts about the pain, the loss of air, you would've simply placed your feet back onto the ground. And thats what hurts me the most.
I'll never forget you, or the way I felt about you. And your funeral will never be erased from my mind. The enormous ammount of people who loved you... I just wish you would've known that hun.
I love you buddy, and I hope you're having a wonderful time in heaven and/or beyond. You deserve that break you so desperately attempted to get, and I'm sorry you felt that was the only way out. See you on the other side, man.
I miss you and everything you were to me. I miss your smile, your odd sayings, your cute gestures, and your unbelievable talent at making me laugh. You were there for me through so much of my life. Even on that last day you were there... asking ME how I was. I remember everything you said to me that day, EVERYTHING. I even remember how happy I was being back in that spot with you back to that closeness from our childhood days.
Zach... when I think about what you did and how you supposedly never planned it, it hurts me. Do you regret it? After you did it, did you think "Oh shit... no!" or was there a sense of relief? Was it really what you wanted or did you just act on anger and hurt?
I should've known. I should have noticed that look on your face and read into it a lot closer. I should have told you how important you were to everyone including me and promised to call you that night.
Your poor brother. What he saw... it will forever be etched into my brain. It's a nightmare that I can't stop living inside my head. And Im sure it's 100 times worse for him. I closemy eyes and instead of seeing that happy smiling face, I see what he saw... and it kills me inside to know that that was you. My Zachariah Micheal Gerald McDougal.
Everyone claims to have a different piece to the puzzle, some new information that nobody else knows... something that will explain to everyone else, what the truth was. But I know you did it on purpose... the shed was short... if you had any second thoughts about the pain, the loss of air, you would've simply placed your feet back onto the ground. And thats what hurts me the most.
I'll never forget you, or the way I felt about you. And your funeral will never be erased from my mind. The enormous ammount of people who loved you... I just wish you would've known that hun.
I love you buddy, and I hope you're having a wonderful time in heaven and/or beyond. You deserve that break you so desperately attempted to get, and I'm sorry you felt that was the only way out. See you on the other side, man.