Thoughts and Notes so far...
Please reload the page to view comments.
- by Shadowy Embrace
- © All rights reserved.
"The challenge of leadership is to be strong, but not rude; be kind, but not weak; be bold, but not bully; be thoughtful, but not lazy; be humble, but not timid; be proud, but not arrogant; have humor, but without folly." ~ Jim Rohn
The truest mark of leadership is not found in who will listen to you; rather it is found in who will follow you because of their trust in you.
It is through the realities of life that one learns about either going with the flow, which is the easy way, or battling against the status quo. Having been in the military, I was often looked at as the insubordinate airman, when all I was wanting was a simple answer that no one wanted to give. I had no problems in fighting the powers that be, even though I was but a peon with no power to speak of. But I did have a voice, which has gotten only stronger since then. And my fight is still the same.
This isn’t to say that a leader will go against the grain, or will even challenge the perceived rights of the time, this is to say that a true leader won’t care whose toes are stepped on as he cares for those under his charge in wisdom and truth.
Wisdom and truth. These are forlorn words anymore with great meaning but seemingly little value in our current society, should one care to notice. Let’s start with truth, which should be synonymous with honesty. To know all the facts, to search the truth before passing judgment, to not keep anything from those in your care, this is what I mean when I speak of truth. In this is a word no one likes anymore… integrity. Integrity, in a nutshell, means doing the right thing/making the best choice at all times with what you’re given regardless of who’s watching or the situation. In other words, we must not be justifying an action simply because the situation allowed for us to take advantage of something we shouldn’t have. If there is question as to it’s being right or wrong, we shouldn’t do it.
As for wisdom, this is born of truth. It is often said that experience will lead to wisdom, but this is only true if the individual learns from said experience. The definition of a hypocrite is not merely saying one thing and doing another (this is the watered down and very misleading definition), but rather not learning from doing the one thing that shouldn’t have been done. There are consequences to every action taken, no matter the choice made, and for someone to not learn from having made the same mistake more than once, that person is then a hypocrite (and to many of us, seemingly quite dumb). To know better, yet still choose the same path doesn’t seem to make any sense, does it? Yet that is exactly what we do. Wisdom is turning from the hypocritical stranglehold on society, taking a stand, and keeping our head above the din of the crowd below. Not arrogance, wisdom. A man of wisdom is like a lighthouse in the dead of night. When the darkness surrounding doesn’t allow for sight, it is the place of the lighthouse to show those at sea the way home. Wisdom is this light. A true leader is this man.
Since the beginning of written history, mankind has faced the same problems over and over again; they simply appear in different forms as we’ve progressed as a race. The issue then, is not the problems we’re facing from day to day, but how we are handling them. There is a saying, “if you are facing an issue right now, welcome to the club; if you aren’t, brace yourself, because it’s coming.” In this alone, leadership takes on a different role altogether. Leadership here takes on not only his/her own issues, but the issues of those in their charge as well; and not because they have to, but because they care. A leader is alone in his place, but he/she cares for those under them, and as such, carries their burdens with them all the way through the storm they’re facing.
The men and women I’ve surrounded myself with throughout the course of my life is a testament to the man I was and have become. You see, I have taken immense amount of pride in the fact that I’ve always been intelligent enough to surround myself with those who are more intelligent or wiser than I am. I have allowed myself to trust a select few and they have been chosen not only as friends, but as confidants, brothers, and accountability partners. Men I can turn to when I’ve done something stupid and who are not afraid to hit me upside the head and tell me how stupid I was. Sometimes, this is needed in life; friendly, trusted reminders that we are still human, still completely fallible.
Not one of us is perfect, and failure, though we should never get accustomed to it, is not meant to petrify us but is actually meant to help us grow. Again, there comes that learning curve we all seem so eager to miss out on so often in our lives. I keep these men and women close to me in my love for them, and their love for me. As such, we are able to face anything that comes our way, as one voice. Each of these men and women are leaders in their own way, and though I may not necessarily need to, I’ll turn to them for wisdom from time to time in an effort to hopefully see something I’d not noticed before. A fresh set of eyes never hurt, and neither did asking for help. Yet we are so arrogant, aren’t we? We seem to have this mentality as a culture that asking for help is a sign of weakness; well, let’s set the record straight right now; if you are so arrogant as to NOT ask for help, then you are weak. My strength is often found in my fallibility and more importantly, in my admittance of my fallibility and, in turn, my reliance upon those who are not weak in those areas. In other words, it is completely okay to not be perfect. It is okay to make mistakes. As a matter of fact, what kind of leader would you be if you didn’t make mistakes?
However, here comes the tricky part. To make mistakes is a part of life, and as such we should be willing to accept the responsibility of every mistake we make. First rule of leadership, everything is your fault. Accept it, learn from it, and press on. Simple. If you keep it simple, and learn well how to pick yourself up when you fall, then you will go far.
Balance. The quintessential problem facing most in western society. All work and no play is just as detrimental as all play and no work. As is no time spent with family. Working full-time takes up 40+ hours a week, for some careers, some will work upwards of 80 – 90 hours a week. Tiredness, irritability, these and more will lead to problems at home which will then bleed back over to work. One problem usually begets another. Long hours at work, no time spent at home with spouse and kids, frustrations will rage, and not just from the one working. But from the spouse, which adds more stress, all the while you’re missing your children growing up and they’re begging for time to be spent with you. Divorce is already at an all-time high; do we really need to add to the issues we already face? I don’t think so either. So, the question that comes from that is simple: what actions are we going to take to find that balance and stick with it.
I’ll never chastise hard work, as I have found it essential to good living, but to leave behind those we proclaim to love and relegating them to the back burner, so to speak, is not fair to them. I’d guarantee, under most circumstances, they’d rather have you than the money. A true leader is not just a leader in the workplace, but a leader at home, at church, and in every facet of his/her life. Always living in the way of his/her wisdom and integrity, throughout every aspect, every thought and every action taken in day to day life; this is why balance is so important. Money is important for the essentials such as a roof over your head, food on the table, bills paid, etc., but it is not life, nor should it ever become life. I’ll never presume to tell you how to raise your children, but do you seriously want to become one of those who end up cutting their children from your will because they’re nothing but irresponsible morons waiting like vultures for your death? Nope, didn’t think so. I’ve yet to meet a person who wishes their children to be anything but independent…
The truest mark of leadership is not found in who will listen to you; rather it is found in who will follow you because of their trust in you.
It is through the realities of life that one learns about either going with the flow, which is the easy way, or battling against the status quo. Having been in the military, I was often looked at as the insubordinate airman, when all I was wanting was a simple answer that no one wanted to give. I had no problems in fighting the powers that be, even though I was but a peon with no power to speak of. But I did have a voice, which has gotten only stronger since then. And my fight is still the same.
This isn’t to say that a leader will go against the grain, or will even challenge the perceived rights of the time, this is to say that a true leader won’t care whose toes are stepped on as he cares for those under his charge in wisdom and truth.
Wisdom and truth. These are forlorn words anymore with great meaning but seemingly little value in our current society, should one care to notice. Let’s start with truth, which should be synonymous with honesty. To know all the facts, to search the truth before passing judgment, to not keep anything from those in your care, this is what I mean when I speak of truth. In this is a word no one likes anymore… integrity. Integrity, in a nutshell, means doing the right thing/making the best choice at all times with what you’re given regardless of who’s watching or the situation. In other words, we must not be justifying an action simply because the situation allowed for us to take advantage of something we shouldn’t have. If there is question as to it’s being right or wrong, we shouldn’t do it.
As for wisdom, this is born of truth. It is often said that experience will lead to wisdom, but this is only true if the individual learns from said experience. The definition of a hypocrite is not merely saying one thing and doing another (this is the watered down and very misleading definition), but rather not learning from doing the one thing that shouldn’t have been done. There are consequences to every action taken, no matter the choice made, and for someone to not learn from having made the same mistake more than once, that person is then a hypocrite (and to many of us, seemingly quite dumb). To know better, yet still choose the same path doesn’t seem to make any sense, does it? Yet that is exactly what we do. Wisdom is turning from the hypocritical stranglehold on society, taking a stand, and keeping our head above the din of the crowd below. Not arrogance, wisdom. A man of wisdom is like a lighthouse in the dead of night. When the darkness surrounding doesn’t allow for sight, it is the place of the lighthouse to show those at sea the way home. Wisdom is this light. A true leader is this man.
Since the beginning of written history, mankind has faced the same problems over and over again; they simply appear in different forms as we’ve progressed as a race. The issue then, is not the problems we’re facing from day to day, but how we are handling them. There is a saying, “if you are facing an issue right now, welcome to the club; if you aren’t, brace yourself, because it’s coming.” In this alone, leadership takes on a different role altogether. Leadership here takes on not only his/her own issues, but the issues of those in their charge as well; and not because they have to, but because they care. A leader is alone in his place, but he/she cares for those under them, and as such, carries their burdens with them all the way through the storm they’re facing.
The men and women I’ve surrounded myself with throughout the course of my life is a testament to the man I was and have become. You see, I have taken immense amount of pride in the fact that I’ve always been intelligent enough to surround myself with those who are more intelligent or wiser than I am. I have allowed myself to trust a select few and they have been chosen not only as friends, but as confidants, brothers, and accountability partners. Men I can turn to when I’ve done something stupid and who are not afraid to hit me upside the head and tell me how stupid I was. Sometimes, this is needed in life; friendly, trusted reminders that we are still human, still completely fallible.
Not one of us is perfect, and failure, though we should never get accustomed to it, is not meant to petrify us but is actually meant to help us grow. Again, there comes that learning curve we all seem so eager to miss out on so often in our lives. I keep these men and women close to me in my love for them, and their love for me. As such, we are able to face anything that comes our way, as one voice. Each of these men and women are leaders in their own way, and though I may not necessarily need to, I’ll turn to them for wisdom from time to time in an effort to hopefully see something I’d not noticed before. A fresh set of eyes never hurt, and neither did asking for help. Yet we are so arrogant, aren’t we? We seem to have this mentality as a culture that asking for help is a sign of weakness; well, let’s set the record straight right now; if you are so arrogant as to NOT ask for help, then you are weak. My strength is often found in my fallibility and more importantly, in my admittance of my fallibility and, in turn, my reliance upon those who are not weak in those areas. In other words, it is completely okay to not be perfect. It is okay to make mistakes. As a matter of fact, what kind of leader would you be if you didn’t make mistakes?
However, here comes the tricky part. To make mistakes is a part of life, and as such we should be willing to accept the responsibility of every mistake we make. First rule of leadership, everything is your fault. Accept it, learn from it, and press on. Simple. If you keep it simple, and learn well how to pick yourself up when you fall, then you will go far.
Balance. The quintessential problem facing most in western society. All work and no play is just as detrimental as all play and no work. As is no time spent with family. Working full-time takes up 40+ hours a week, for some careers, some will work upwards of 80 – 90 hours a week. Tiredness, irritability, these and more will lead to problems at home which will then bleed back over to work. One problem usually begets another. Long hours at work, no time spent at home with spouse and kids, frustrations will rage, and not just from the one working. But from the spouse, which adds more stress, all the while you’re missing your children growing up and they’re begging for time to be spent with you. Divorce is already at an all-time high; do we really need to add to the issues we already face? I don’t think so either. So, the question that comes from that is simple: what actions are we going to take to find that balance and stick with it.
I’ll never chastise hard work, as I have found it essential to good living, but to leave behind those we proclaim to love and relegating them to the back burner, so to speak, is not fair to them. I’d guarantee, under most circumstances, they’d rather have you than the money. A true leader is not just a leader in the workplace, but a leader at home, at church, and in every facet of his/her life. Always living in the way of his/her wisdom and integrity, throughout every aspect, every thought and every action taken in day to day life; this is why balance is so important. Money is important for the essentials such as a roof over your head, food on the table, bills paid, etc., but it is not life, nor should it ever become life. I’ll never presume to tell you how to raise your children, but do you seriously want to become one of those who end up cutting their children from your will because they’re nothing but irresponsible morons waiting like vultures for your death? Nope, didn’t think so. I’ve yet to meet a person who wishes their children to be anything but independent…