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(I Always Think I'll Cry) The Letter is in His Pocket Now.

I wrote a letter for a boy...he's a boy...not yet a man. But girls become women sooner than boys become men! I hope he grows a pair after he reads my letter.
http://alljournal.com/journal/32144-Hopefully-I-Got-it-Right-Now (This letter)1

And it's in his pocket now.2

I'll add this much more on the subject...cause I saw him today and it was pleasant...we were both meek...but I felt closer to him today than I did last week.3

Ryan, Becky pulled my sorry ass out of bed all week. She made me put on a little black dress and even made me wear my God damn stilettos. Then she made me eat dinner with her, have drinks, and talk about how much you suck. She kept me happy this week. Thank her!4

I always think I’ll cry. Ryan, I stared at you for two hours today. Don’t know if you noticed...maybe not. I think you had trouble looking me in the eye today. If I were you I would have too. I did notice you take a peek, and a sweet one too, because I think you figured out I wasn’t feeling well today. See, I know you still got it. I fainted because of my condition and hit my head earlier this week. You wanted me to go a doctor. You know I’m stubborn! But I promised you I would if my head started to bother me more. And I know I should anyway.5

Class got cancelled so we walked a little instead and did our...uhm, your Italian homework. Well, I wasn’t much help....unless me being pretty helps you concentrate. I don’ think it could. I want to remind you that the first time you said I was pretty I had horrible sun poisoning all over my face, so I wonder how alluring I must have been looking to you ever since the blisters healed and my face stopped peeling!6

We talked, you let me in on probably the most intimate details of your life, and I promise you they’re still and always secrets! So I’m baffled where we are headed. I know you do nothing but joke with our other friends, which is always fun and fine but I seem to be the only one who knows funny and serious you, which is so special to me. I think that means it’s special to you too. So why can’t I stay close? You’re actually letting me closer! CONFUSION!7

We just didn’t kiss today.8

Call me weird for knowing this, but I’ve sat so close to you for so long that your smell is familiar to me...and you don’t even wear cologne. It’s creepy but I know what YOU smell like. I’d never tell you this but I recognize your combination of laundry soap and skin. Sometimes I can even smell it on me...which drives me nuts. Makes me wonder if I make you smell like my perfume. Do you smell like pomegranates after you hug me? Haha.9

I felt it in the back of my throat like a balloon being squeezed between a child’s hands but I didn’t shed a tear. 10

I’ll never cry.11

You hugged me today still. (Hope you smell like pomegranates.) I’m glad you did but I think you’re the only one who participated. It’s not because I’m ungrateful. I’ll always care for you the same. I just couldn’t manage to put my arms around you today because after we hug we would have kissed had it been last week. Then we hug again and I would have buried my giggling face right into you.12

If I hugged you today and got to my face anywhere near you I may have actually cried, so maybe I should have. I think you need to hear it. 13

So before you left I gave you my letter today. You’re so forgetful sometimes so I hope you remember...or I’ll have to remind you tomorrow. I don’t mean to be pushy but it is this important to me. This letter is all I’ve thought and slaved over this week. And if you read it I think you’d be crazy if it didn’t become important to you too.14

After you read it I’ll know where we really stand. Either you’ll feel something and come around or you really are just a loser. (A loser with the most montsterous stress and anxiety problems I've ever seen) I almost feel like, that after you read my letter you should feel inspired enough to put your books down long enough to come beat my door down, grab me at the waist, and kiss me...but...those are just the daydreams. I'd understand if you wanted to talk about it first! Haha.15

And after you turned around from me and went to your next class...I hid my face because that’s when I cried.

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Comments

1 - 6 of 6
  • This is so cute and witty xD what happened next????????


    • Random Goldfish gold member
      November 7
      Edit | Reply
      Well...he told me he has feelings for me and I'm perfect...but I guess in his mind there's still some reason he can't be with me. I have a few more things to say to him and I'm just looking for him to come around...


  • Angel-of-Pain
    November 1
    Edit | Reply
    wow...he better have came and beat ye door down...he should.


    • Random Goldfish gold member
      November 7
      Edit | Reply
      He most definately should. He has no idea what he's missing...either way he's the loser. I win. If it's not him...someone will give their world one day and he'll realize he let me go and how dumb he is for doing it.


      • Angel-of-Pain
        November 9
        Edit | Reply
        awh ye soo true. As the song goes;
        "heres to the men we love, heres to the men who love us, heres to the men we love who dont love us, fuck the men lets toast to us!"


  • SunDew
    October 6
    Edit | Reply
    I hope for the best for both you & your - boyfriend(?). I sincerely hope he beats your door down though!

1 - 6 of 6

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