"In the movie of your life, who would play you?"1
I am not me. My heart beats, just like yours, but it does not mean the same thing. You cannot compare yourself to me, your life to mine. I am not you, and I do not wish to be. I have walked this line, invisible, for almost all of my life. You can’t see me. How can you when I can barely see myself?2
I use to fling myself into everything I found that gave me pleasure. Music, pain, friends, love, but none of it calmed my soul. Can you feel this? Can you feel the heat coming from this fire inside me? I close my eyes, I close them and I see so many things, yet I see nothing at all. The beauty and the darkness are one. They will always be one, right? Everything is ok in the dark, like when you sleep and when you die and when you wake up in the morning each day. This can’t always be the same…3
Today, through this all, I can still feel. Your arms have healed this, for a moment, but I will smile for as long as my body will let me. I am me, suspended just like this kiss, just like this feeling of skin against skin. Love against love… I don’t want this to go away. I don’t want to fade, be invisible. Can I ever stay like this? Your smile tells me all I need to know. You will remember me. 4
I’ve found these lights in the dark. They are blurred together and gorgeous, every color. Take hold of me. Whenever I want to, I can ignite, if I only try. I can leave this all behind; I can fly just like in my dreams. All this time it has been here, blinding me. Just look. I’ve heard this in the back of my head for so long and now it’s time to face the music. No one else will ever feel this. 5
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Comments
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This is good.
Writing and music is like a therapy to you, to get everything out. And I think its helping you some.
I love you<3
I want to hold you<3
I can't wait to see you
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