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College is a mundane existence

Ah, the life of a young, bright-eyed student just on the verge of becoming an adult!
College...it's supposed to be filled with exciting new friendships, career opportunities, and just a time to hang with cooler, more intellectual humans crowded in bars or pool tables as we chat about our awesome, independent new lives!
Yeah...real fucking great.
Well, this is someone who barely survived high school and its pointless drama, who skipped the prom, nearly beat a girl to death in the cafeteria, avoided sports like the plague, rarely spoke, and struggled with depression since birth.
That's me: No Name, Weirdo, Reject, Freak, Mute, Ghost, Loser.
I'm the girl in the corner, guitar slung over one broad shoulder, as I sing everyone a sad song about broken dreams and lonely summer nights...
No, that's totally lame and I'd never put you guys through that. >_>
My friends of SW--Prodigious Mirth, Bird-Mad Girl, MsAlee, Much-Dipstick, Friesian, Lady Pixie, Mike Driscoll jnr--you guys are all I've got, so please don't disappear. XOXO
Anyways, on a less sappy note, college ain't what it's cracked up to be. I was expecting parties and cute boyfriends and long, jam-packed nights of study, but I'm bored as ever. X_X
Without my stories or fictional characters to save me, then I'd totally be underground by now. I would be packed like a sardine into some cheap casket covered in red roses with my mother blubbering and wiping her nose while my dad would be all stiff-lipped as he tried not to cry. And my brother...well...he'd just crawl into himself because that's what he does.1

Things will get better, I know they will...but it's all a matter of *when*.
I'm sick of playing the waiting game all my life.
It's not like things can get any worse from here. 2

~ love, Serpentine

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  • Mike Driscoll jnr
    September 10
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    In England, we have high school, til you're 16 and then college or sixth form (til 18, sixth form is the main way of going university) in my experience of sixth form, I never knew what I wanted and never had any friends. I was submitted to abuse daily by other guys and girls who thought they were better than me because they didn't have spots, or because they had lots of money and I never had any. But now look at them! I have a job that many are proud of, I have lots of friends and I like who I am (if not, sometimes I delve into my darker side)

    What I'm saying is...life isn't what it seems. Everything will change when you leave college after graduating (?) and getting into the big wide world. Never lose your morals, outlook on life or sell your soul. For those fuckers will trip up and you'll carry on.

    Keep smiling and perservering, for those who don't, have already given up on life.

    Mike
    xxx

    Love ya


  • bird-mad girl
    September 9
    Edit | Reply
    I was supposed to go to college last year. but, two days before I'm supposed to leave, my mom told me I couldn't. my rents had to file for bankruptcy and couldn't get me a student loan. I cried like my heart was going to crawl up my throat. I got a job to pay for school myself but it's not enough. I have to get a second job.

    honestly, with college, I only wanted to go so I could get the fuck out and go back up to Chicago. now I have to wait till summer to leave. I'm right there with you, it fucking kills me that I have to be caged like a fucking animal. and I'm sorry you have to put up with that shit because your a sweet girl and if people can't see that then they don't deserve to breath.

    As for the waiting game. given the hindsight of my own life, I honestly don't believe things ever get better or easier. Yeah, I have my moments when things are okay and I can say I'm happy but it doesn't continue. You just have to learn how to stand stronger when the waves rush in deeper, and you just have to learn how to survive differently each time. Things may get worse but that doesn't mean you have to be defeated.

    all my love
    xxxx


  • Prodigious.Mirth
    September 9
    Edit | Reply
    I feel the same way sweets, exactly the same way. I always feel a sort of twisted appreciation for the way you are. To me, we are interconnected souls who oftern, more oftern than enough travel through the same sphere ;] Like yesterday ^_^. I am always going to be here for you, no matter what. You are my girl, my sugar plum, my cherry pie. Things have to get worse before they get better. It's just the way with people like us ;]

    <3 You have your friends support and love.
    ^_^
    Blair <3

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