I'm so confused. I don't even know what to think. I'm so scared about being pregnant, that I don't even know what to think. I can never tell him, he'll ruin both of our lives. I just can't let that happen. I refuse to let that happen. He ruined my life enough, he'll never touch my child.
I love Andrew so much, he means everything to me right now. The part of my heart that Brandi doesn't already own are all his. I'm scared though, I'm scared that he'll get sick of me, realize how much of a fuck up that I am and leave me. I don't deserve someone so amazing, so perfect. I don't deserve to be loved. I know that I don't, not with how much I screwed up in the past.
I miss it sometimes, the sheer bliss of being able to forget my problems. I dont know what's keeping me away, my love for brandi, andrew, my baby that has to be it I know that, I just hope its enough.
Cause i've never been enough,.
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i went through a very similar situation. and i wish you the best of luck and a hapier ending than i had.
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Just writing that all out shows how much strength you have. Obviously, a stranger like me has no idea of your circumstances, but I know what it is to love someone who seems too good for you, and what it is to feel hopeless... So many people out there admire you, even people like me who you've never met, don't even know the name of.
Keep strong darling, for your own sake, your baby's sake, and your friend's sakes.
Things have a habit of turning out right, if only you can give them enough time. I know that's how it will be for someone as beautiful as you.
All my love and hope for you,
Cat xx -
you've always been more than enough for me love. And If he does do all of those things you mention up there then he's not worth it and that makes him just like mike. And the only way mike will touch your child (our child) is if hell freezes over, thaws, and then freezes over again. You're going to be just fine, you're so much stronger than you give yourself credit for, i know, i observe it all the time.
love love love,
B
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