Jbbrandi• Show poetry

Hey there! I'm 13 and loving it. I just love poetry because it helps me express myself. I hope you like my work! Let me know what you think by commenting! And because I feel like it....
Here are my...

FAVORITE QUOTES: (they're obscure, and you'd have to know me to know what they are)

"FINE! Take your banana! [crying]"

"I don't have a third arm! Silly fans! HAHAHA!!"

"AWKWARD...!"

"I love love!"

"This place smells bad..."

"Or when you're riding your bike, and the tire pops, hold on...to your bike...uh..."

"I'm more of a Limited Too guy, though..."

"Live like you're at the bottom, even if you're at the top."

"I'm Mufasa, I'm the kind of the land! I'll come smack you with the back of my hand!"

"Yeah, I know...it's always good to see me, right?"

"Do WE know the MUFFIN MAN?!'"

"I feel so powerful in my short-shorts.."--Glynis

"Goofy hamburger!"

"I'm AppleBananaPeach Amoeba III!!!"

"I reject your reality and substitute my own!"

"SH-H-H-H-H-H-ODA!!!"

"Mush!..."

"Cue. Dramatic. Music."

(sorry for making you read my insanely stupid quotes! I hope you found at least SOME of them enjoyable! lol)

And now here's a really sweet quote:
"There's no such thing as perfect, but there's a perfect person for you."
*sniff* lol Isn't that a sweet little quote? Warms your heart, right? ♥

And now for the best quote ever known to mankind:
"I hate mankind, for I think myself one of the best of them, and I know how bad I am"--
James Boswell
(1740-1795)

Here's one of my favorite poems (cuz it's funny!!) It's by Shel Silverstein:
Friendship:
I've discovered a way to stay friends forever--
There's really nothing to it.
I simply tell you what to do
And you do it!

Another one by Shel Silverstein:
Fancy Dive:
The fanciest dive that ever was dove
Was done by Melissa of Coconut Grove.
She bounced on the board and flew into the air
With a twist of her head and a twirl of her hair.
She did thirty-four jackknives, backflipped and spun,
Quadruple gainered, and reached for the sun,
And then somersaulted nine times and a quarter--
And looked down and saw that they pool had no water.

And another (Shel Silverstein is one of my faves)
Peckin':
The saddest thing I ever did see
Was a woodpecker peckin' at a plastic tree.
He looks at me, and "Friend," says he,
"Things ain't as sweet as they used to be."

And here are a few people that I recommend:
CheeseNuggets
Celtic Legend
Phoenix-Shadow207
Irishguy001
penman (though I'm sure most of you have read his stuff considering he has so many comments and people that he knows on AP)
Poetic Whisperer (same goes for her as penman)
soccer220 (whether you like their poems or not, you HAVE to laugh at their profile!! I love their little sayings and questions and stuff! just check it out!! XD )
Avalin--AMAZING insight and beautiful poems
Emile--such talent!

And quickly, here's my little AP family:
sisters: Phoenix-Shadow207 & CheeseNuggets
And that's my tiny AP family....


-PLEASE READ THIS-



My name is Sarah I am but three,
My eyes are swollen I cannot see,
I must be stupid I must be bad,
What else could have made My daddy so mad?
I wish I were better I wish I weren't ugly,
Then maybe my mommy would still want to hug me.
I can't speak at all I can't do a wrong
Or else I'm locked up All the day long
When I awake I'm all alone
The house is dark My folks aren't home.
When my mommy does come I'll try and be nice,
So maybe I'll get just One whipping tonight
Don't make a sound! I just heard a car
my daddy is back From Charlie's Bar.
I hear him curse my name he calls
I press myself against the wall.
I try and hide from his evil eyes
I'm so afraid now I'm starting to cry.
He finds me weeping He shouts ugly words;
He says it’s my fault that he suffers at work.
He slaps me and hits me And yells at me more,
I finally get free And I run for the door.
He's already locked it and I start to bawl,
He takes me and throws me against the hard wall.
I fall to the floor with my bones nearly broken,
and my daddy continues with more bad words spoken.
"I'm sorry!” I scream but it’s now much too late
His face has been twisted into unimaginable hate.
The hurt and the pain Again and again
Oh please God, have mercy! Oh please let it end!
And he finally stops and heads for the door,
While I lay there motionless Sprawled on the floor.
My name is Sarah and I am but three,
Tonight my daddy murdered me.

We need to stop child abuse!
Help Support This and Put This in Your Profile

And moving back to something that's not depressing, serious, or meaningful at all...:


96.4% of American teens today would die if Abercrombie & Fitch said it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. If you're part of the 3.6% that would be laughing their butts off, put this in your profile.


(\_/)
(='.'=)
(")_(")
I have a little bunny named Jimmy...


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ROCK ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!


Oh, and ONE LITTLE AFTERTHOUGHT:
Ok, if you're looking for a giant LAUGH, go to www.youtube.com and search for anything Potter Puppet Pals. Literally. That's what you type in!! Then, look for the ones by NeilCicierega, and some of the ones by StuartZX. Neil and Stuart are HILARIOUS!! Especially check out: "Wizard Swears", "The Grand Old Adventure", "Wizard Angst", "Ron's Computer", and also: YOU MUST SEE THESE VIDEOS:
1. Fingertrap
2. No Place Like Home Parts 1, 2, 3, 4, & 5 (if you like the ending credits)
3. Neil Kart 64
4. Neil Saves Christmas Parts 1 & 2
5. Sleepingbag
6. Balthazar the Elephant
7. My Benjamin Franklin
and MANY more!! They're all by NeilCicierega (which is pronounced: Sis-a-ree-guh) and he's AWESOME! I also think he's kind of cute...lol Sorry, random. Anyway, those videos are all HILARIOUS! Some of the best videos on EARTH! You MUST check them out! They always crack me up! XD
UPDATE ON THIS YOUTUBE THING!!!
You must search "Fred on May Day" and click on the one whose username is Fred!!! IT'S SO FUNNY!!!
Any videos from him are HILARIOUS!
you might also wanna check out www.youtube.com/jklproduction

Here are some people I'd like to thank for being amazing rolemodels and people and quite an inspiration:
Joe Jonas
Kevin Jonas II
Nick Jonas
Frankie Jonas
Denise Jonas
Kevin Jonas
I know, a lot of Jonas. I apologize, but not to the Jonases. They are all amazing people and I wish that I could have as wonderful a family as you. (that sounds really lame...I mean, I absolutely LOVE my family!!, but sometimes...well...we just don't get along and I kinda wish we were more like the Jonases in that way...)
Anyway, I love you guys! I hope you're reading this right now!!!
I love your music, and you're all amazing people!!
ROCK ON!!!!


NOW FOR SOME INTERESTING FACTS!!!

* Sloths take two weeks to digest their food...then they'll slowly climb down from their tree home and...well, I think you get the picture.
* Sharks and rays are the only animals known to not get cancer. It is believed that it is because they have cartilage, and not bones.
* A duckbill platypus can store as many as 600 worms in the pouches of its cheeks.
* The only nation whose name begins with an "A" but doesn't end in one, is Afghanistan.
* In Idaho, it is illegal for someone to give another citizen a bag of candy weighing more than 50 pounds
* It is against the law to whale hunt in Oklahoma...
* The combination "ough" can be pronounced in nine different ways. The following sentence contains them all: "A rough-coated, dough-faced, thoughtful plough man strode through the streets of Scarborough; after falling intoa slough, he coughed and hiccoughed."
*The verb "cleave" is the only English word with two synonyms which are antonyms of each other: adhere and separate.
* Approximately 60 circus performers have been shot from cannons. At last report, 31 of these have been killed.
* On the new hundred dollar bill, the time on the clock tower of Independence Hall is 4:10
* In the kingdom on Bhutan, all citizens officially become a year older on New Year's Day.
* On average, there are 333 squares of toilet paper on a roll.
* If you have three quarters, four dimes, and four pennies, you have $1.19. You also have the largest amount of money in coins without being able to make change for a dollar.
* acetwothreefourfivesixseveneightninetenjackqueenking Excluding the joker, if you add up the letters in all the names of the cards in the deck (ace, two...king) the total number of letters is 52, the same number of cards in the deck.
* A recent study conducted by the Shyness Clinic in Menlo Park, CA, revealed that almost 90% of Americans label themselves as shy.

They make you think, don't they? lol I'm not sure how reliable all these facts are, though, so if one of them is wrong, I'll fix it. Anyway, hope you learned something! lol

And finally...


1) Write the name of a person of the opposite sex.
2) Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, green, yellow?
3)your first initial?
4) Your month of birth?
5) Which color do you like more black or white?
6) Name of person of the same sex as you?
7) Your favorite number?
8) Do you like California or Florida more?
9) Do you like the lake or ocean more?
10) Write down a wish (a realistic one)
are you done? if so scroll down!!
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THE ANSWERS
1) You are completely in love with this person.
2) If you chose:
Red- you are alert and your life is full of love.
Black- you are conservative and aggressive.
Green- your soul is relaxed and you are laid back.
Blue- you are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you love.
Yellow- you are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are down.
3) If your initial is:
A-K you have a lot of love and friendships in your life.
L-R you try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is soon to blossom.
S-Z you like to help others and your future love life looks very good.
4) If you were born in:
Jan-Mar The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you will fall in love with someone totally unexpected.
Apr-Jun You will have a strong love relationship that will not last long but the memories will last forever.
July-Sep You will have a great year and experience a major life changing experience for the good.
Oct-Dec Your love life will not be too great but will eventually find your soul mate.
5) If you choose:
Black- your life will take on a different direction, it will seem hard at the time but will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change.
White- you will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do anything for you, but you may not realize it.
6) This person is your best friend.
7) This is how many close friends you have in your life time.
8) If you choose:
California- you like adventure.
Florida- you are a laid back person.
9) If you choose:
Lake- you are loyal to your friends and to your love. And you are very reserved.
Ocean- You are spontaneous and like to please people.
10) This wish will come true only if you RE-POST THIS BULLETIN in one hour

girl facts

When you catch a girl
glancing at you,
she wants you to look
back and smile

When a girl bumps into your arm
while walking with you
she wants
you to hold her hand

When she wants a hug
she will just stand there

When u break a girls heart
she still feels it when
you run into each other 3 years later

When a girl is quiet,
millions of things are running through her
mind

When a girl is not arguing,
she is thinking deeply

When a girl looks at you with eyes full of
questions,
she is wondering how long you will be
around

When a girl answers, "I'm fine," after a
few seconds,
she is not at all fine

When a girl stares at you,
she is wondering why you are playing games

When a girl lays her head on your chest,
she is wishing for you to be hers forever

When a girl says she can't live
without you,
she has made up her mind that you are
her future

When a girl says, "I miss you,"
no one in this world can miss you more
than that

When a girl is mean to you after a break-up
she wants you back, but shes
scared she'll get hurt and knows
you're gone forever

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Guy Facts:

When a guy calls you,
he wants to be with you

When a guy calls you to just say hi or stop by to say hi.. he is thinking of you and can't get you off of his mind...

When you are on the phone with a guy, and no one is talking, he doesn't get bored, the only thing he cares about is the time that you share...

When a guy looks into your eyes, he is looking into you

When a guy is quiet,
He's listening to you...

When a guy is not arguing,
He realizes he's wrong

When a guy says, "I'm fine." after a few
minutes
he means it

When a guy says "you are beautiful," he means it

When a guy stares at you,
he wishes you would care about him and
wonders if you do

When your laying your head on a guy's
chest,
he has the world

When a guy calls/texts/comments you everyday,
he is in love

When a (good) guy tells you he loves you,
he means it

When a guy says he can't live without you,
he's with you til your done

When a guy says, "I miss you,"
he misses you more than you could have ever missed him or anything else

repost this in 10 minutes and your true love will call
you

FUNNIES!!!

What is the speed of dark?

Do coffins have lifetime gaurantees?

Have you ever noticed that if you rearange the letters in mother in law, you get the words, 'Woman Hitler?'

Why do people always tell you not to stand infront of an emergency exit? If there was an emergency, surely you'd run through it?

Why is it when people say "What three things would you take with you on a deserted island?" why does no one ever say "A boat." ?

If mirrors need light to work, what happens if you put on night vision glasses in the dark and look at a mirror?

If you only have one eye, and you close it, are you blinking or winking?

How old are you before it can be said you died of old age?

Why is the show called unsolved mysteries? if they were solved they wouldn't be mysteries.

Why is it said that an alarm clock is going off when really its coming on?

In libraries, do they put the bible in the fiction or non-fiction section?

Why are red buttons always the most important?

Could someone be addicted to counseling? If so, how would you treat them?

Why does it say do not use before work with heavy machinery on the back of childrens tylenol?

How come the Bible is the most stolen book, and one of the ten comandments is "thou shall not steal"?

Why do mattresses have designs on them when they're always covered with sheets?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

Why do they report power outages on TV?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

Where in the nursery rhyme does it say humpty dumpty is an egg?

If there's an exception to every rule, is there an exception to that rule?

If Practice makes perfect, and nobody's perfect, then why practice?

Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?

If Dracula has no reflection, how comes he always had such a straight parting in his hair?

If you decide that you're indecisive, which one are you?

what does the K in K-mart actually stand for?

What do you say when someone says you're in denial, but you're not?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Why is it illegal to put money in other people's parking meters?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why is it that when things get wet they get darker, even though water is clear?

Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning 'many' in Latin, and 'tics' as in 'bloodsucking creatures’?

Are children who act in rated 'R' movies allowed to see them?

When a store has double doors why do they only let you use one of them?

-He who laughs last thinks slowest

-If two wrongs don't make a right, try three

-1 out of every 4 people are insane. Look at your three best friends, if it's not them, it's you.

-One day we're going to look back on this, laugh nervously and then change the subject

-Apparently 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are five people in my family so it must be one of them. Either it's my mom or my dad. Or my older brother Collin. Or my other brother Ho-Chan-Chu. I think it's Collin.

-Evening News is where they begin with "Good Evening" then proceed to tell you why it isn't



I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you, geez!


Don't run in the school hall, gliding is more fun!

Officer, I swear to Drunk I'm not God!

You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder

I'm the kind of who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened...yesterday.

They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.


Ok, you've read this far (maybe) so I'm gonna tell you a little about me! Yay!
Favorite music--almost anything except (some) screaming music and (some) rap.
Favorite colors--almost any color. I like the interesting colors where people argue about what to call them.
Favorite food--anything Mexican or Italian. I'll try some other things occasionally...
Favorite books--Harry Potter 1-7, Pretty Little Liars series, How To Be Popular, Anne Frank: The Diary Of A Young Girl, and anything Shel Silverstein or Edgar Allan Poe.
Favorite poet: Edgar Allan Poe ALL THE WAY! WOOT WOOT!
Favorite author: J.K. Rowling and...all the other authors of my favorite books.
Influences in my own poetry: None...I just wing it and hope people like it! Well, AND I kinda draw inspiration from amazing people. Mostly the really stupid people though.
Other info: I'M JONAS-OBSESSED!
GUESS WHAT? MY WORD (coozapalooza) THAT EVERYONE THOUGHT WAS RETARDED, MADE IT ONTO A RADIO AD! BOOYAH!!!


Does Your Name Fit?

A: hot
B: loves people
C: good kisser
D: makes people laugh
E: Has gorgeous eyes
F: people wild and crazy adore you
G: very outgoing
H: easy to fall in love with
I: loves to laugh and smile
J: is really sweet
K: really silly
L: smile to die for
M: makes dating fun
N: can kick the s*** out of u
O: has one of the best personalities ever
P: popular with all types of people
Q: a hypocrite
R: good boyfriend or girlfriend
S: cute
T: very good kisser
U: is very sexual
V: not judgmental
W: very broad minded
X: never let people tell you what to do
Y: is loved by everyone
Z: can be funny and dumb at times



B: loves people
R: Good GIRLFRIEND hehe
A: hot (BOOYAH!!! lol)
N: Can kick the **** out of you
D: makes people laugh
I: Loves to laugh and smile
^^That's basically me!! AWESOME!! Bahaha

Oh, and one of my favorite things to say?
MY GOSH GOLLY GOODNESS!
That, and KAPLUNKAL!

TEEHEE!!!
(589!!! that's my 589th time saying teehee! GASP 590!!)

---JBBRANDI!!!! ♥♥♥
=|: )}-K  (that's Abraham Lincoln! My friend and I made it up!)

By the way: Meine Pizza gesprungen über Neptun.




Naughty words are not nice!
So shut the !$!@# !@$!@#$ 14!@$!@# up ok??? I mean !@#$!@#$ you @#$!@$ for crying out !@$!@3 loud! GOD! you're such a !@$!@# !@$!# 134@#4141234!@$!@#!@#!@$!@# !@$!#$@#$


I think I've made my point.


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^^My special note to everyone who read this far.