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As Moist As Any Dawn

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Summer's afternoon, soft as rose petals,

throws light across her eyes; cool blue jewels,

and conversation sparkles while the night,

inches quietly towards our respite.

Tomorrow's contemplation shall not sigh

as here we capture the present's wild cry,

fold it into warm sheets of harmony,

then wander gorgeous laughter, bold and free.

 

Soon, we'll leave behind this romantic place,

but first, I feel the urge to kiss her face,

such lips, as moist as any blossomed dawn,

speak silently while we enjoy this lawn.

And wondrous time's fine flow sets us aglow,

cheese and wine devoured, it's time to go,

a beautiful day has been bright with love,

we've breathed in scents whilst Heaven danced above.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

i n d i v i d u a l i t y http://stores.lulu.com/chasingtheday

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Comments

100 - 184 of 184     < previous  1 2

  • appleey
    June 28

    Edit | Reply

    wow

    how do you do this.. this would take a year for me to write a poem like this.. is just perfect i belive!!


  • Net
    June 28

    Edit | Reply
    Agree with Bleeding rain a few comments down. Why is it that romantic writing from a male makes so much more of an impact? Beautiful poem, I saw, I felt. Your choice of words worked well. I enjoyed reading this.

  • LoveEverlasting
    June 28
    Edit | Reply
    A nice soft love poem. I quite like it.


  • valefor gold member
    June 28
    Edit | Reply

    Wow!

    Great poem, reading it over and over!


  • i-me-myself
    June 28

    Edit | Reply

    WOW!!

    I love it!!The words used are so beutiful like jewels...i feel likeeveryword is in place and no other word could have been used in place of it.


  • luckyv1303
    June 28

    Edit | Reply

    unbelievable

    i used to read poems like these and think they were people just throwing deep words together that make no sense...trying to be poetic and dwise. i see that it is much more than that and i can feel every emotion spilling from every word. an amazing job.


  • Ami
    June 28

    Edit | Reply
    Wow this is really good great imaginary also
    Amazing write like all of yours that I've read so far
    -♥Amy♥
    oh and you deserve more then 3 claps for this
    But 3 is all I can give so here you go
    I'm happy I added you as a favorite


  • BleedingRain
    June 28

    Edit | Reply

    Appealing Imagery

    Why is it that when I read romance written by a man, it always seems so much more romantic than stuff written by women? Not attacking women writers or anything...but Shakespeare wrote better stuff than Danielle Steele. Anyway, another great write..."cool blue jewels" was my favourite part of this one. Amazing imagery to connect to someone's eyeballs. Nicely done.


  • Rend the Veil gold member
    June 27

    Edit | Reply
    I just so love the feeling when i read this,
    makes me believe your words to be true
    Beautiful!! lovely writing!!

    Blessings

    Rend


  • myrataal silver member
    June 27

    Edit | Reply

    Timeless Perfection ...

    written in a soft and gentle pen, unforced, flowing, free in its silence of tenderness expressed.

    Well done, Ian! Congratulations on the response, too. The poets are impressed!
    Love
    Myra


  • white stone
    June 27
    Edit | Reply
    soft and sweeping rhyme here, delicate with love. good write.


  • PassionsPromise gold member
    June 27

    Edit | Reply
    Now this was a most passionate piece. Impressive actually. Kept me sighing. Lovely, lovely
    piece

    Love
    Passions


  • LadyLavender gold member
    June 27
    Edit | Reply
    I love this side of you...

  • indisciplined
    June 27
    Edit | Reply
    Nice writing

    Ian


  • Swan song gold member
    June 27
    Edit | Reply
    there u go

  • Swan song gold member
    June 27

    Edit | Reply
    THERE IS IS REASON WHY THIS IS POPULAR because it is dam good This is a poem to read more then once Kudos to you!!!!!


  • Dancing Moonbeam
    June 27

    Edit | Reply
    a soft flow of magic as a wonderful outing unfolds...breath taking beauty from a masters pen...thank you kind sir for sharing...


  • Night Hope gold member
    June 27

    Edit | Reply

     
    Sighs, indeed, Scribe. A lovely rhyme, in spite of what you said.
     
     
     

  • A big ail
    June 27

    Edit | Reply

    Pretty and Classic

    It flows very well, but sounds just like the sort of love poem from the Elizabethan era. Meaning it takes too much thought.


  • Bigal369
    June 27

    Edit | Reply

    Intriguing

    I enjoyed this poem so much that I'm going to choose this one to recite for my english class. I'll be double-sure to give you credit for this poem. Truly amazing! Wonderful job!


  • malmadre gold member
    June 27

    Edit | Reply
    You have a romantic side after all, I have seen brief glimpses now and then, but this one captures a perfect evening with cheese and wine, without a cloud on the horizon. Englishmen know, how best to speak of love.

  • shattered.love
    June 27

    Edit | Reply
    This is amazing, i like this a lot, great job, i really liked taking the time to read this, you did something great here, keep writing and i will be sure to keep my eye on you in the future because i loved this a lot, i can't say it enough, once again, great great job

    shattered.love


  • xoboriquababy234
    June 27
    Edit | Reply
    this poem was really good. it had alot of depth in it. well written. flowed nicely.


  • Karen Layne
    June 27
    Edit | Reply
    sweet! a nice interlude


  • Roaddog Wolf
    June 27

    Edit | Reply

    Beautiful

    What a great poem to read, I can realate to the depth of the romance in what you have expressed so eloquently. Been some time since I have been able to visit the group and this being the first poem I have had the chance to read, and a pleasure it was to read.
    Thank you for sharing such a mastery of feelings, great write!!


  • Jaded Lily gold member
    June 27

    Edit | Reply
    Stunningly beautiful work here, Ian! I think this is one of my favorite love poems from you to date. I would have to quote the entire piece if I needed to put down what part I liked. Very well done, as usual, from our one and only individuality who is far and away one of the best poets of the decade.
    BK
    Love,
    Lily ♥


  • TwiztidMaggot
    June 27

    Edit | Reply
    this is really good. I liked it. Keep up your great work!

    TwiztidMaggot


  • Overcast
    June 27
    Edit | Reply
    Beautifully penned.


  • krupty
    June 27
    Edit | Reply
    this is really nice


  • MyMudPies
    June 27

    Edit | Reply
    Very beautiful. The passion you have painted of a lovers getaway. At times the words feel almost sad and it pushes a sense of loneliness to the reader. some of the rhyme feels a bit forced and the words seem a bit much for the spirit of the write but it is your work and it is what you feel. It was very nicely done I am pleased you featured this and gave me a chance to read these beautiful words. Great write through and through,
    Stephanie

  • Macsword
    June 27

    Edit | Reply

    Man!

    That love bug has hit you square between the eyes and then when you weren't looking, again between your buttocks. Of course it hasn't affected your mastery with words, poetic device or rhyme. Well done poet.


  • Andre ben-YEHU
    June 26

    Edit | Reply

    Beautiful...

    I like this poem, except the rhyme of "petals with jewels" and "harmony with free". The second stanza is a shining jewel.

    Much gratitude to the author of "As Moist As Any Dawn" for sharing this scented flower.

    In respect and admiration,

    Andre Emmanuel Bendavi ben-YEHU


  • Twilit Wolf Era
    June 26

    Edit | Reply
    I could've sworn I felt dampness somewhere over here, where? I have no idea! I guess it was how GRAND this poem was! The wording flows right off the page! Great write poet!


  • KimberlyKramer
    June 26
    Edit | Reply
    loved the wander gorgeous laughter bold and free

  • good2bfree
    June 26
    Edit | Reply

    Wow..

    That poem is amazing and just shows people what love really is!!


  • fatizeh
    June 26
    Edit | Reply
    omg!! this is tooo good!!truly romantic!just loved it woah!

  • hiddengoth
    June 26
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    i just got the idea 4 wut me n danielle r doin 2nite wonderfully inspiring


  • 2lullabyhaven
    June 26
    Edit | Reply
    Romance, Ian's style...smile...I like your style


  • Daizee silver member
    June 25

    Edit | Reply
    No better words can possibly describe the beauty of living in the moment...


  • Sacred Ground
    June 25
    Edit | Reply
    I can see this, but more importantly, I feel it. A wonderfully passionate write, Very well done!


  • Antebellum
    June 25
    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful imagery.
    I love the rhyme you have going.

    thanks for sharing.

  • Laly gold member
    June 25

    Edit | Reply

    Nice!

    I don't normally go in for rhyme but here it's unobtrusive and adds to the intimate romance with which this poem bubbles. Good one


  • darell
    June 25

    Edit | Reply

    Yessss!

    cool and passionate and romantic.
    you caught the wave and road it
    to infinity my friend.
    I could feel and imagine everything
    as your words cruised inside the
    intrigue of my mind and captivated me.
    Exquisite!! Bravo


  • KariiB89
    June 25
    Edit | Reply
    beautiful imagery!
    keep it up!


  • Swan song gold member
    June 25
    Edit | Reply
    one hell of a pic in my head and a lovely spun poem to boot right in sybc with the season


  • Fox.
    June 25
    Edit | Reply
    nicely done.


  • Melodies
    June 25

    Edit | Reply
    Just checking in to see what you're up to and I must warn you about going out into the countryside for a romp in the wilds. That fragrance you have experienced was put there by a cow and the moistness is something else the cow did and the wild cry you mention is your lady love stepping into what the cow did. I am sorry. Forgive me but I could not help myself and I am... well... forgive me again but I am not ashamed, even. Your poem is beautiful, though, and I am not spamming so do not report me, please.


  • Aun Ali
    June 25

    Edit | Reply
    A good piece of romantic seems to have been shared here. I am not into remantic literature though, but this one is really a good one to read. Good Work my friend.


  • Emerald Lass
    June 25

    Edit | Reply

    Just so you know...

    I don't usually comment on poems that seem like they might be romantic because they lead to romance and that leads to love and that leads to craziness. I put a cake there in case you might be hungry and that is your reward for writing this poem. It is a good poem but I read only every other word, backward, in case it was about romance. AND I might add that the last line read backward, every other word is about romance, too, so you really fooled me.


  • PinkPony
    June 25

    Edit | Reply
    You might think twice about kissing her face because if you do, you will find out the truth... that she is really a robot and she will smack you a good one. I do hope you write a lot more poems like this one, using the same words, only in a different order.


  • Girl in Red
    June 25

    Edit | Reply

    Ah... warm sheets... sigh...

    Warm sheets, right off the clothesline... right? You stole them as you walked to the place you describe. Then you returned them on your way back with grass stains, I am SURE! Oh well, you have a fine memory of whatever you did in the woods. Luscious lines that lock the reader's mind on YES!


  • Blossom Fairy
    June 25

    Edit | Reply
    If you don't mind, I ate the cheese but left the wine for you, which means I will have to be the designated driver and that is good because I want to swing by the shops and look at silver rings. You always make me glad when I read your poems and you did it AGAIN!


  • Lucy in the Sky
    June 25

    Edit | Reply

    Ah, a wild cry...

    If ever I go out to a wooded place I think there might be a snake and if you heard a wild cry, that would be me, Sir. As for romance, I guess I will take a bag full to dream on sometime when the mood hits me. An extremely lovely poem.


  • Periwinkle Blue
    June 25

    Edit | Reply
    Happiness is a beautiful day and a picnic. You describe it in such a lovely way, it is making me hungry for a barbecued hamburger and if you don't have those, I will take a tomato sandwich.


  • FaerieNWonderland
    June 25

    Edit | Reply
    this is a great piece i love the imagery and the romantic feelimg burning in every word and line
    thank you so much for sharing such talent

    Your Faerie


  • Eric Marsh
    June 25

    Edit | Reply

    oh man

    this yet again a superb, beautifully written poem, touching the reader on both intellectual and emotional levels, i got nothing else to say (thinking to myself "twat")
    cheers and good health lol.....keep cool my mate


  • rainbows. gold member
    June 25

    Edit | Reply
    This is very beautiful, it is filled to the brim and more with love. The rhyming flowed nicely together, and it all went very well. Awesome poem, good write. ;D


  • AliceinPoetryLand gold member
    June 25

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    Oh my such beautiful imagery indeed. Have I mentioned before how well you do love poemsAnd your flow is always flawless


  • frownsnfreckles
    June 25

    Edit | Reply
    beautifully descriptive with the perfection of rhyme that moves so gently you hardly notice how carefully each line has been crafted. There is a soft feel of the breeze while the sun warms throughout. Aaah the whiper of love.


  • rainbowbunniie
    June 25
    Edit | Reply
    I think you have a good style but I do agree with another said about limiting your flow and imagery with this particular rhyming. I do feel like the poem started off rather romantic and talking about a woman "light across her eyes" and then continues "I feel the urge to kiss her face" which was good but I feel like it felt kind of sidetracked and was cut short at the end of the poem.


  • Bones
    June 25

    Edit | Reply
    this is the epitome of a perfect summer day, i really love this. i usually don't appreciate rhyme... but wow. paired with your word choice, it's incredible. every line was like opening a Christmas present.


  • WarpedAndTwisted
    June 25
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    Wow! this poem gives me goosebumps!


  • Scar Symphony
    June 25
    Edit | Reply
    sounds to me that this couple or group are very close to death and yet they are celebrating, having a glorious time as the dark creeps closer, and together hand in hand they will fall into the night's sweet embrace...that's just how i see it...but an absolutely wonderful work of art


  • stef-witt gold member
    June 24
    Edit | Reply
    I think this is a really beautiful image, and that the language and structure is strong.

    If I were to offer some advice, I would say that you are limiting your imagery and flow with the rhyme. It's good, but personally I think that you could have filled it with more emotion and beauty if it wasn't fitting to a specific rhythm.

    But I really enjoyed it as it is - thank you!


  • Unbreakable3
    June 24

    Edit | Reply
    Oh My god, I've never read anything Like this, I wnat to say that this is incredible, I'm usually noyt a fan of this, but This is an exception! Beautiful, solid subtle rhyming and such great tastfulness. Incredible, simply mindblowing!


  • PurpleAraucana
    June 24
    Edit | Reply
    a summer afternoon's romance 'neath Heaven; what a golden time.

    a lovely poem.


  • adolescente
    June 24
    Edit | Reply
    a beautiful day has been bright with love,

    we've breathed in scents whilst Heaven danced above.

    LOVE IT> absolutely heavenly. your writing is the true definition of individuality. I am again, in awe. i love everything you do and how you do it.

    thank you for blessing the world with this beautiful write.


  • No Quarter
    June 24

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    again, you command figures of speech like its only natural to you...which it probably is. beautiful imagery and words.


  • Rose Angel gold member
    June 24

    Edit | Reply
    Delightful write in rhyme and flow...Romance blooms and sweetly retires for the night... penning...

  • seay49 gold member
    June 24

    Edit | Reply

    very nice!

    i like the very intense images of this poem. The second stanza is alive with the way your words flow. this is my best read of the day! -Jeff


  • dutch2lips gold member
    June 24

    Edit | Reply
    oh, i was reading this, expecting some bitter twist in the end, you bowled me over with this dainty and love filled write ( nothing new I know)
    kudos my dear, again!


  • csjswimgirl
    June 24
    Edit | Reply
    I loved it! I like the seriousness and the lightness, perfect balance!


  • Lucian Valcor
    June 24

    Edit | Reply
    huh i didnt think i was going to like it but it really takes you for a ride and some how brings you imges of a better time wonderfull i truly enjoyed

    thanks for your entry

    Lucian Valcor


  • Midnight Raeven
    June 24
    Edit | Reply
    This was so elegantly written that I was amazed at the simplicity in your love. You showered your loved one with such a beautiful essence of yourself!

    Wonderfully written! I loved how you kept the background clean and the white on black fits perfectly with this poem!

    Thanks for entering,

    Midnight Raeven


  • Uniquely-Scarred
    June 24

    Edit | Reply
    some beautiful language used here i enjoyed the read, take care and the best of luck in the contest


  • Mariana gold member
    June 24

    Edit | Reply
    This made my spirit soar. So beautiful my love

    Mariana  


  • Discoveria
    June 24

    Edit | Reply
    Some beautiful imagery in this piece - I especially like "the night / inches quietly towards our respite" and "blossomed dawn". It has a contented mood to it at the end - perfectly capturing the evening of a long and warm summer day.

    One minor suggestion - "we've took" seems a little clumsy to me.


  • poetryality silver member
    June 24

    Edit | Reply
    I saw the scene played out in words. What a wonderfully romantic story of love that truly never has to end as long as we hold on to the memories. You’ve written a beauteous work of words dear poet! You always leave me with a gentle sigh! I wish you well in the challenge.


    Much Love Always ♥

    Renee


  • cookie-monster
    June 24

    Edit | Reply
    This was really an excelent love poem. The last line was prolly my favorite It was well written and had great structure


  • enlightenedatheist
    June 24

    Edit | Reply
    i really enjoyed reading this piece. All of the descriptive words and even flow made me feel like i was watching a narrated play in front of me. Great work and even flow for this poem.


  • Joe Savage
    June 24

    Edit | Reply
    a little hard to fallow. couldn't find a specific scene to focus on. but i liked the way it read. it kept me reading which isn't the easiest thing for me. but i liked it mainly for the context and the stance. three claps!!

  • kevinryan3
    June 24

    Edit | Reply

    Very well done

    Normally I shy away from love poems; however this is excellent very discriptive and flows well.  I enjoyed reading this, Your line of thought held together very well.

  • sleepinglion
    June 24
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    You paint a lovely picture here Ian of magical times


  • Badass Brea
    June 24

    Edit | Reply
    This was elegant & beautiful! I loved all the imagery! If I had closed my eyes I could feel a summer night warm & young. I really enjoyed reading this!


  • Carolina Moon gold member
    June 24

    Edit | Reply
    So deeply beautiful. You always write with such fantastic imagery..it leaves one breathless. Stunning my friend..simply stunning.

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