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A Dog's Life

Sixteen years, now almost seventeen,
I've played at stick and ball, stayed seldom still
until good master's call would whistle shrill
to lead me back - no need to smack.  Sight keen.

Sixteen years tail's wagged as faithful friend,
as boon companion, running round fun years.
His mother passed away, I shared the tears
that fountained forth and never seemed to end.

Sixteen years round each revolving moon
from hearth and home I pick up slightest sound,
ears prick, eyes bright, in sight I'm always found
to hold my ground, though often play buffoon.

Sixteen years, come rain or shine, we walk
twice, sometimes thrice a day, I sense each smell
around the house, know friends and rascals well,
and after dinner hear the table talk.

Sixteen years from pet to family,
from playful pat to priceless kith and kin,
I vet as threat who'd twins' affections win,
can smell a rat or chase cat up a tree.

Sixteen years I've watched the children grow,
suffered unruly hands that now caress,
I guard them still, still at the same address,
as I will willing till my turn to go.

Sixteen years saw summers shedding hair,
saw autumns' colours charm birds from the trees,
saw winter whiteness whose bare branches' frieze
prepared for springs unbounded, weather fair.

Sixteen years, milk - nap - home-made pap brew,
from toothless start, heart full, until depart,
toothless, heart filled beyond all man may chart,
life's cycle spins till ready to renew.

Sixteen years that gambolled life away,
with water, beef and bone, I’ve played at will.
Scents seem less sharp today, and soon I will
make my last bow, - still in thrill dreams I play !


Author notes

Puppy pic
http://flickr.com/photos/tswill/2443146360/



Old age pic
http://flickr.com/photos/aileenfotografie/1468196900/


-----------

Definition : gambol as opposed to gamble
gay or light-hearted recreational activity for diversion or amusement, play boisterously

Definition : frieze as opposed to freeze
horizontal band of sculpted or painted decoration

Definition : vet - wordplay implying 'case the joint' or oversee more than in the sense of animal doctor

-----------

In terms of life expectancy 1 'dog year' is considered to be the equivalent of between 6 and 7 human years. 16 is thus an approximate equivalent of between 100 and 110

Stanza 3 : John Dryden Absalom and Achitophel, pt. 1, l. 545-50 (1681) Zimri, as George Villiers, 2nd Duke of Buckingham

...so various, that he seemed to be
Not one, but all mankind’s epitome.
./.
But in the course of one revolving moon
Was chemist, fiddler, statesman and buffoon.


______

The initial poem wrote itself, drawn through and by a 16 year old labrador that joined four people in a small car for a long trip from Paris to St. Tropez for New Year 1991/1992 ...
... 'and thereon hangs a tail's tale'




In a list

A contest entry

Courtesy welcome and extended [Reward: double points]

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression? Line numbers
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?) (Line numbers)

Comments

199 - 297 of 825     < previous  1 2 3 4 5 6  next >  (show all)

  • SilverButterfly gold member
    January 1

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    this reminds me of my lab! he was just like this. he was a part of our family...like a person.
    I love how you wrote this poem. It's simply beautiful. full of joyous times with that labrador!!


    GBY
    SilverButterfly

  • frownsnfreckles
    January 1
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    This is a lovely idea for a poem, you can feel the joyfulness of a devoted dog with it's family. Interesting to offer it from the dogs point of view but I felt the 7th stanza didn't fit because the emotions and observations are too humanised while the rest is totally relevant to the dog's experiences

    . Rewarded 6


  • Melodies silver member
    December 27, 2007
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    HA!! One of my fav pet poems!

    I am honored to receive your fine dog poem, Sir Poet, and I am giving you this gift today, for bringing it to my contest: And that is not all! You also get this: AND TA DA... This cookie: Your poem is truly magnificent and one of my favorite poems.

    lol

    Melodies

  • Lily otv
    December 24, 2007

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    I really can’t remember whether I have commented on this poem before or not and if I didn’t then I should have and if I did then I am back to say that this piece of craftsmanship has truly withstood the test of time shown through the flawless addition of four extra stanzas, which I think add greatly to the piece.

    Having read some of the comments below I see it has for the most part been appreciated for its content. Of course not everyone likes animals or may not see the value of having a pet, the love and companionship that they bring to all ages including children and the elderly who may otherwise live alone, but in disregarding the content of the piece it appears some have completely overlooked the rhyme, metre and dexterity that this poem so clearly possesses. The poem may be considered long by some but it is written in short stanzas that do not tax the mind, unlike tax forms that most adults have to fill out. It is no wonder the government owes so much tax to so many people if they won’t read anything longer than 10 lines.

    In response to comments made, most dog owners responsibly clean up after their pets (in many countries including here in the UK it is an offence not to do so) and I survived the billions of germs from the dogs I grew up with plus the extra billions that having children also brought into the house. (Perhaps we should forgo foul mouthed children who grow up into foul mouthed adults too?)

    My 17 year old pet came from an animal charity when she was 6 months old, and though she isn’t a dog, I recognise that many other people love or rely on them for company or assistance. If any one wishes to donate to animal charities in the UK, here are a few links:

    Guide dogs for the blind: http://www.guidedogs.org.uk/
    Hearing dogs for the deaf: http://www.hearingdogs.org.uk/
    Dogs for the disabled: http://www.dogsforthedisabled.org/
    Blue Cross pet charity: http://www.bluecross.org.uk/web/site/home/home.asp
    Battersea dogs and cats home: http://www.dogshome.org/rehome/our_dogs/

    I sincerely hope that one of these beautiful, loving, clever and well trained animals never has to rely on some cold hearted people for its welfare.


  • Birchwood
    December 20, 2007

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    You certainly discourage any conceivable misunderstanding with your author's comment. Nicely formed poem.

  • daisy the cow
    December 20, 2007

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    "This composition was not inspired by a personal experience/relationship. The initial poem wrote itself, drawn through and by a 16 year old labrador whose owner without advance warning insisted that he be added as an uninvited guest to join four people in a small car for a long trip from Paris to St. Tropez for New Year 1991/1992"

    My sympathy for having been forced to have a dog in your car. The dog's owner should have been thrown out into the gutter, along with his pooch.

  • Professor Klosett
    December 20, 2007

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    Just think how much crap a dog must pump out on the pavements in sixteen years...............the mind boggles. Think of all the germs spread by the filthy brutes. Yucch Yucch Yucch!

  • England Awaken
    December 20, 2007

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    This so-called poem is long-winded sentimental slop. People should give money to charity rather than waste it on feeding slobbering ugly greedy mutts.

  • FindinSoundInSilence
    December 20, 2007

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    wow! this is a really beautiful poem! your rhyming flow so nicly, one doesn't even notice it's aa rhyme! I usualy don't like repetaion inpoem, but it fit very well here ("sixteen years")!
    interesting how you used those diffrent words (frieze/gambol).
    wonderful right! good luck in the contest!
  • Papagallo
    December 20, 2007
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    10

    What a beautiful way to honor man's best friend. It brought a tear to my eye as I read your work.

  • BellaD
    December 20, 2007
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    Great poem!

    Love the point of view and your apt descriptive language and sensory detail. There was only one line that did not read smoothly for me "I vet as threat who'd twins' affection win" but otherwise it flowed well.

    . Rewarded 4

  • oldpoets
    December 20, 2007
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    As a avid dog lover I enjoyed your write very much. You do write very well. My little man is now eleven andI dread the day that will come. Thank you for the wonderful poem.

  • flowerystone0
    December 20, 2007
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    This is beautiful. I wanted to cry throughout it.


  • xorandomxo
    December 20, 2007
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    wow this was just truly amazing.

    ♥ steph


    • xxpurpleluverxx
      December 20, 2007

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      idk how to comment a new comment so yeah. btw the little profile thing is sorda raciest in a way

      x3 sister x3

  • malmadre gold member
    December 20, 2007

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    My 14 year old friend is in her last days and I am grieving for her before she is gone, I expect each night to be her last. I have given her the best life that I could. Your poem is so touching.

    . Rewarded 4


  • DolphinLass silver member
    December 18, 2007
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    good luck
  • Voulpe
    December 18, 2007

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    10

    a tribute to man's best friend. my dog comforts me in sickness and health. Makes me laugh when ineed it most. He is indeed the best pal I ever had. Your work made me smile. Dogs are great!

    . Rewarded 4

  • mmook
    December 18, 2007
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    i love it well written and expxpress and even flow.. i also am avid dog lover.. thanks for sharing
  • montez gold member
    December 18, 2007
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    Er....

    .......nice. I prefer the original one BTW.
    Not so sure I appreciate the "stilted" grammar in places ; the dropping of the definite article etc. Dunno if it's a style, or a cop-out to better flow.
    Anyway, sentimental but good, and worth a little clap.
    Robin.
  • Justusdreams
    December 18, 2007

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    I thought I could handle this poem but I lost it at 'sixteen years saw summers shedding hair' I just lost my boy, a shepard/timber wolf mix. I relate to every word. It's good, the frame of mind you have here. It's so strange not having him around. This took me back to so so so many happy moments and made me weep like a baby.

    . Rewarded 6


  • CinfullyDelicious
    December 18, 2007
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    As an aivd dog lover, I really felt this coming from the angle of the dog
    Which to me is so interesting within itself, to give the dog a voice, who would have thought

    It is very well written with strong lanugauge and a good flow

    Thank you for using your voice for this one, I appreciated the read and it reminded me to love my dog always

    . Rewarded 6


  • Seraph
    December 17, 2007

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    Aww, I love this poem. Very sweet! Reminds me of my lab. I'm a fan of short poems, so the simple fact that yours kept my attention to the very end is worth kudos!

    . Rewarded 4


  • PsychoticallyInsane
    December 17, 2007

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    This was a brilliant poem! Well written and very vivid! The words work well together! BRAVO! Keep up the great work! This is fantabulous indeed!

  • cquinne
    December 17, 2007

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    Awesome

    Aaw, I teared up a little bit reading this. I'm really scared of dogs, but I still love them and find myself trying to eliminate my fear just to be closer to them. This poem is the perfect picture of "a dog's life." It makes me want to hug every dog I see, if you know what I mean.
    Besides that, it's beautifully written and engaging.
    =)

    . Rewarded 6


  • zackky.Monster
    December 17, 2007

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    Emotional

    It show's the dogs everday life .. It really opens your mind and show's you how repetitive a dog's life is. Laughing Keep up the Great Work !! I would love to read more of your poems. Tongue out

  • zackky.Monster
    December 17, 2007
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    Inspiring

    Lovley ... Its very despcriptive !!! Great Work

  • Princess Peach
    December 17, 2007
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    very good! i liked it, since i own a dog i could relate.

  • Titus gold member
    December 17, 2007
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    A chronology you must be very proud of and you've taken us on aneventful journey here. Nice job!


  • amilicious
    December 17, 2007
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    i like this

    it really describes a dog's life


  • Gypsie Ink silver member
    December 17, 2007
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    Wonderful!

    he loved and was loved well! Thank you for telling his story.

  • PhantomsAngel87 Greeters member
    December 10, 2007

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    G'Day Jonathan ROBIN

    Very wonderful write that held me in it's mist from beginning to end.

    Thank you very much for your entry and putting the option in the authors notes.
    Best of luck
    Stay safe
    ~Manda

  • Shining eyes
    December 6, 2007

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    Ok, this is hard. First, this is a beautiful poem. I've read it three times and each time it just seemed better. There is so much craft and skill, and not a word out of place. Each line is a joy to read. But it's not personification, which is the theme of the contest. It's a dogs thoughts from a dog, not human thoughts for an object. I considered leaving this in the contest, because I love it so much, but I don't think I could justify that. I'm sorry and I hope it wins one of the other contests it's in, it deserves it.


  • pugsforlyfe
    December 5, 2007

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    omg

    omg that was very beautiful! I love how it starts of was sixteen years! wondeful job, good luck in my contest!

  • RedwingSpirit silver member
    December 1, 2007
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    Very Lovely Poem


  • LittleAnn
    December 1, 2007

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    Jonathan, I have read this poem many times before, but I had to come back to read it again because it was still on my mind... And now, after reading it again, I love it even more than before...
    You are truly a poetic genius, you wrote something that is impossible to forget.
    The meter, rhymes and alliterations flow so naturally, this makes the poem seem like you wrote it without trying hard... Everything fits together so beautifully...

    I am so glad you are sharing your excellent writing on here for everyone to read!

    Annie

  • Bob Fox
    November 28, 2007

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    Special

    Absolutey a wonderful write. Animals, Dogs especially can bond with a family in a great way. 16 years of love. wow a tear here
  • mmook
    November 28, 2007
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    thanks for sharing

  • Marshall013004
    November 28, 2007
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    awww this was a lovely poem dear !!! life through a pups eye . very sweet!!!!

  • psychiatrists dream
    November 27, 2007
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    a lovely poem, thanks for entering and good luck!

  • QueenOftheJunglegym
    November 21, 2007

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    such a brilliant, sentimental, well thought poem! I can really sympiphise as i to love dogs and my dogh is my best and most faithful friend
    Very well written

    Congrats!

  • Gone-Lost-soul
    November 19, 2007

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    Awesome poem.Very good write.I love dogs so i love the way you put your poem!!
    So like yea Awsome!!!!!

    . Rewarded 4


  • Night Hope gold member
    November 13, 2007

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    "Sixteen years tail's wagged as faithful friend,
    as boon companion, running round fun years.
    His mother passed away, I shared the tears
    that fountained forth and never seemed to end."

    An exceptional penning, Scribe. I had a golden retriever once...a Lhasa Apso, an Irish Setter & a dog that was half~German Shepherd & half~Cocker Spaniel. I've also had numerous cats over the years. Growing up, we had a domesticated rabbit, as well as hand~raising wild cottontail bunnies...& others along the way. To me, a house is not really a home unless there's a loving companion there to share your joys & sorrows...& one that enjoys a good bone now & again. Good luck in the contest, my Friend. Wanda

  • ajocean
    November 12, 2007
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    dogs rule

    i love dog specifically german shepherds. it is moving and very well written. great work.

  • cryingwolf28
    November 12, 2007

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    wow

    what a poem this was great job i like the way you used diffrent words i mean wow great poem good luck in the contest.


  • Poetdontknowit
    November 12, 2007
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    WELL.............

    I am a dog lover! I have had chocolate labs, yellow ones, black, etc. Best kid dogs in the world. They are as important as my kids. I now have a jack russel terrier, a fawn female boxer, and her son, a MASSIVE white boxer named lug. her name is roxie. DOGS RULE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    POETDONTKNOWIT

  • Prison of Lyme
    November 12, 2007

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    Love it!

    I love my animals sooo much. I hate to think they won't be here for long. I don't have kids, so mine are my babies.

    . Rewarded 4


  • Gods-Artgal
    November 12, 2007
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    This is a great poem. What was your inspiration for writing this poem.
  • rakesh123
    November 12, 2007

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    Very nice read. I especially loved the play with sounds, the assonance-laced internal rhymes. The best part, though, was that to me, the poem captured the heart of a faithful canine: there, uncomplaining, playing, knowing, forgiving, and yet seeing. Great work
  • bhoward664
    November 12, 2007

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    I enjoyed both versions of the poem. Although the revised version is truly the most sophisticated of the two I prefer the pure sweetness of the original.

    . Rewarded 4

  • fanniesson
    November 12, 2007

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    Just want you to know I enjoyed this poem
    might’ve gotten a little sappy
    but you have to expect that with these types of works
    p/s at least the dog didn’t die
  • NeferMaatNetjer silver member
    November 12, 2007

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    My parents had two dachshunds that both lived to be 16. those are years i wouldn't trade for anything. they were both fiesty brats right up to the end. dogs and cats both have personalities, and for that reason relate better to humans than other animals.i think thats why were take so well to them.
  • ljstuntz
    November 11, 2007

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    Really moving poem. I love the anaphora in each stanza. It's amazing that you could write such a good poem with out experiencing the relationship yourself. Great job!
  • Peter Grimley
    November 11, 2007

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    Sorry, not really very appealling. One thing you used the word till, this is an object used for collecting money in shops, did you mean 'til short for until?
  • Enola Faith
    November 11, 2007

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    sad but true

    I have one dog who is a bit younger than yours but still very old. He doesnt see well or hear well and I think its sad our pets dont live as long as we do. I will miss him when he is gone but I also have two who are three years old so they overlap and I will not be dogless!This poem so strikes my heart.

    . Rewarded 6


  • Maribel
    November 10, 2007

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    Very moving!

    Reading this poem left me with a lump in my throat! I have a dog who is old and faithfull, not quite 16 but getting there. I dread the thoughts of losing him, we've shared so many wonderful years together. He's been a real part of our family, just as you described so well in your beautiful poem. I loved it!

    . Rewarded 6

  • chrysanthemuse
    November 10, 2007
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    Aww, this is so sweet! the repetition of each first line works well.

  • Stormraven
    November 10, 2007

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    I love this poem , I have an old dog who never leaves my side , so I know just where yyour coming from , Storm

    . Rewarded 4


  • Bleep7
    November 10, 2007

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    They truly become a part of the family, don't they? We have 4 dogs ourselves and we love every one of them. Blessings!

    . Rewarded 4


  • ArtFullyMe gold member
    November 10, 2007

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    In August of this year, my companion of 12 years reached that final place..
    This manages to capture so much of what he was.. the dedication, the free spirit, the life ..

    and it's perhaps more amazing ....that it was not drawn from personal experience... but then ..not all things must be.. for some of us..


  • renaissance
    November 9, 2007

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    a nice Ode on the man's best friend... loved the way you have gotten yourself into your pet's mind and spoke out through him. lovely poem

  • thelordreigns gold member
    November 9, 2007

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    I enjoyed the reread more than the first read. What a wonderful poem you have here. It is worth all the promotion!

    - joanne

  • Tam gold member
    November 9, 2007
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    lovely!

    great write!


  • Little Blue Bird
    November 8, 2007
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    Precious

    Animals can quickly become a part of the family. I love the whole thing! Good luck in the contest.


  • Mystical-Gardenia
    November 7, 2007

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    Exquisite!

    Your skill and tallent beautifully embroider the truth of your loyal friend and companion~ it never ceases to amaze me how the depth of truth in writing seems to be the hidden factor - the ribbon to complete the content when applied with the care and skill as you have becomes a vibrant beautiful writing The added notions are a wonderful consideration to those who would question

    Wishing you much success in all of your endeavors May your VIP (very important pooch) continue to have a long healthy life

    . Rewarded 8


  • Mandy Pants
    November 7, 2007

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    this was great. i kept hoping that the dog didnt die, as i have lost my own pet and did not want to relive the pain. i admired that your inspiration (from reading your comments) was from a poem not a companion of your own.

    . Rewarded 4


  • gcpirelli
    November 7, 2007
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    Beautiful, a fitting choice of words for kindly companions. Thank you for a great piece of work.


  • fireymoondancer
    November 7, 2007

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    applaud this poem

    I know you must have loved him like a family member and that is what i see and with so much love. I know the feeling, for my own four pawed best friend has gone and is very missed but remembering her as though she will always be with me and I love the tribute to the love you have for him. greatly written

    . Rewarded 6


  • shzoosyQ gold member
    November 7, 2007

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    this was an awesome tribute to our four pawed friends. They love unconditionally and should never be abused( in my humble opinion) I treat my three pets as family... and they've earned their spots in my heart. My life would not be complete without them ...lovely rhythm and scheme here. Peace and harmony...desi

  • zilbermann silver member
    November 6, 2007

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    Bow wow!

    We have read all the comments and agree with the ones praising this poem. What can we say that hasn't already been said? In the last stanza you rhyme "will" with itself, which is contrary to the standard rules, not that we consider that very important. Otherwise the rhymes work very well. Rory the Wheaten Terrier likes the poem a lot and hopes he lives a very long time too.

    . Rewarded 8


  • Miss Kristy
    November 5, 2007
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    GORGEOUS!

    beautiful
    x x x

  • PureRomance
    November 5, 2007

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    I Love This!

    This is a very beautiful poem. I love it. I'm an animal lover so This really caught my eye. Awesome job. I hope you win this contest. This is an amazing poem. The rhyming scheme, the picture it paints. The depth of emotion and truth that you've managed to captivate in this poem is absolutely amazing. Keep up the excellent work. I know sometimes absolute flawless beauty could be considered to be a masterpiece and this a magnificent masterpiece of art. I love it. Good job with this.

  • CrystalFlower
    November 5, 2007
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    Such a sweet poem, you described dogs so well. Since I love dogs so much! You did a wonderful job!

  • womania
    November 5, 2007
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    A*!

    Just to follow up... Don't listen to some of the strange comments people make on here. People have strange agenda(s) and sometimes clearly don't understand things one is saying and get annoyed! - (not realising they should be annoyed with themselves!) Good luck!
  • womania
    November 5, 2007

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    Best poem yet

    Ok so I'm just a bit of a sucker for puppies but this is a really beaitiful poem and my own dogs couldn't have put it better themselves!

    . Rewarded 4


  • account disabled
    November 5, 2007