not after you
By SweetZsKuLLy on August 12th 2008, early morning.on topic I'm not repairable
bruises and cuts
blood comes out
a punch and a kick
i can't be fixed
a smile or a frown
still on a sad face
a laugh or a tear
now numbed by fear
myself i lost when i let you in
my heart you stole and kept me hanging
on the edge i was, wishing for an exit
away you were, controlling me like a puppet
my eyes lost that shine they had
the days i spent wishing to be dead
my mind i lost in the fire of your words
my life i gave away while playing with swords
all you did was push me away from you
as a fool, i offered a love so true
your name, your career, both had more value
i'm not repairable, any more, not after you
blood comes out
a punch and a kick
i can't be fixed
a smile or a frown
still on a sad face
a laugh or a tear
now numbed by fear
myself i lost when i let you in
my heart you stole and kept me hanging
on the edge i was, wishing for an exit
away you were, controlling me like a puppet
my eyes lost that shine they had
the days i spent wishing to be dead
my mind i lost in the fire of your words
my life i gave away while playing with swords
all you did was push me away from you
as a fool, i offered a love so true
your name, your career, both had more value
i'm not repairable, any more, not after you
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lie in my arms
By SweetZsKuLLy on July 2nd 2008, terribly early in the morning.on topic Lie in my arms and just forget
lie in my arms and just forget
the bad times others forced you to have
lie in my arms and be sure to be safe
for i'd give anything to see you smile
lie in my arms and let yourself go
trust me in my arms, you won't be taken advantage of
lie in my arms and let time pass
for tomorrow you'll still have me by your side
lie in my arms and let me love you
i'll spoil you and treat you the way you deserve to be
lie in my arms and just smile at me
it'll make all my worries fade into the sky
lie in my arms today
lie in my arms tonight
put your head on my chest
and your arms around my waste
lie in my arms tomorrow
lie in my arms forever
the bad times others forced you to have
lie in my arms and be sure to be safe
for i'd give anything to see you smile
lie in my arms and let yourself go
trust me in my arms, you won't be taken advantage of
lie in my arms and let time pass
for tomorrow you'll still have me by your side
lie in my arms and let me love you
i'll spoil you and treat you the way you deserve to be
lie in my arms and just smile at me
it'll make all my worries fade into the sky
lie in my arms today
lie in my arms tonight
put your head on my chest
and your arms around my waste
lie in my arms tomorrow
lie in my arms forever
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the more..
By SweetZsKuLLy on July 2nd 2008, terribly early in the morning.on topic Whats wrong with being gay?
we can't walk hand in hand
if we do, torture we might have to stand
strangers looking strangely
do i care? no, but my baby i want in safety
we can't kiss on the street
we can't shout our love beyond our heartbeat
shouting is my last intention
by whispering, my feelings i mention
our home is our world
yet the world is not our home
between walls we're free
and beyond, we're prisoners trying to flee
we speak love on our lips
passion and care on our fingertips
the more they try to pull us apart
the more love grows, deep in our heart
if we do, torture we might have to stand
strangers looking strangely
do i care? no, but my baby i want in safety
we can't kiss on the street
we can't shout our love beyond our heartbeat
shouting is my last intention
by whispering, my feelings i mention
our home is our world
yet the world is not our home
between walls we're free
and beyond, we're prisoners trying to flee
we speak love on our lips
passion and care on our fingertips
the more they try to pull us apart
the more love grows, deep in our heart
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yes you, black beauty
By SweetZsKuLLy on June 7th 2008, late afternoon.on topic I Want To Cry
the train passed and didn't wait
i missed my chance, you've set a date
and it makes me cry
you've cut my air supply
i can't breath without you
i'm already suffocating, wishing death
every word rushes to my last breath
i can't look forward for life without you
my heart's not only skipping a beat
it's fading on the sidewalk on the street
and my eyes have become red
call the angels, for it i'd be glad
yes you, black beauty
you've left a hole inside of me
when you ripped my heart out
but never noticed how hard i used to shout
yes you, black beauty
you're the reason my eyes are teary
why my life is empty
for you've spelled love to rain on me
why i can't be merry
for you've ran with another to marry
i missed my chance, you've set a date
and it makes me cry
you've cut my air supply
i can't breath without you
i'm already suffocating, wishing death
every word rushes to my last breath
i can't look forward for life without you
my heart's not only skipping a beat
it's fading on the sidewalk on the street
and my eyes have become red
call the angels, for it i'd be glad
yes you, black beauty
you've left a hole inside of me
when you ripped my heart out
but never noticed how hard i used to shout
yes you, black beauty
you're the reason my eyes are teary
why my life is empty
for you've spelled love to rain on me
why i can't be merry
for you've ran with another to marry
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for i still love you
By SweetZsKuLLy on June 7th 2008, mid-afternoon.on topic I Still Love You
the most secure place, the house of God
has become the place from which i run
in my head, there's a picture of a bride
walking to the alter, so proud
and that bride is you
only steps away
he awaits
to take you
and wed you
and i stay at the door
with the perfect image on display
a love celebrated with friends and family
i can't move, i can't speak
my heart, once again, skips a beat
you look beautiful, in the arms of someone else
you mock perfection
you outdo perfection
and that's now become your husband
as you've both said your "i do"s
and there i am, staring blankly..
...
.
...
that's the woman that occupies my day
the woman i adore
that's you, the one i love
you're the woman who makes me smile
the woman who makes me write
it's you, who i'm walking away from
cuz you've asked me to
and your choice i respect, for i still love you
has become the place from which i run
in my head, there's a picture of a bride
walking to the alter, so proud
and that bride is you
only steps away
he awaits
to take you
and wed you
and i stay at the door
with the perfect image on display
a love celebrated with friends and family
i can't move, i can't speak
my heart, once again, skips a beat
you look beautiful, in the arms of someone else
you mock perfection
you outdo perfection
and that's now become your husband
as you've both said your "i do"s
and there i am, staring blankly..
...
.
...
that's the woman that occupies my day
the woman i adore
that's you, the one i love
you're the woman who makes me smile
the woman who makes me write
it's you, who i'm walking away from
cuz you've asked me to
and your choice i respect, for i still love you
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leaving, you behind
By SweetZsKuLLy on June 6th 2008, mid-morning.on topic The hardness of Leaving
there you are
soon to wed
and here i am
can't be mad
crazy in love in fact
your face i cannot forget
alwayz something rings a bell
i'm burning in the flames of hell
i look at the world and i see you
the stars don't have the shine they used to
so which is harder for you dear?
to leave me?
or to know you're soon left behind?
cuz for me, it couldn't be more clear
none is easy
i'm leaving and leaving you behind
soon to wed
and here i am
can't be mad
crazy in love in fact
your face i cannot forget
alwayz something rings a bell
i'm burning in the flames of hell
i look at the world and i see you
the stars don't have the shine they used to
so which is harder for you dear?
to leave me?
or to know you're soon left behind?
cuz for me, it couldn't be more clear
none is easy
i'm leaving and leaving you behind
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letting go
By SweetZsKuLLy on June 1st 2008, terribly early in the morning.on topic letting go
i'm letting go of the one i'm crazy about
love is pain, first hand i found it out
i can stand on rooftops and still cannot shout
after the storm, silence, now, feels so loud
i'm letting go of the true gurl i used to be
believing love could set a soul free
i will not hide and i will not flee
love has smashed all the little pieces of me
i'm letting go of a stoned heart gone soft
i'm letting go of a person who has beautifully loved
i'm letting go
it's so hard you know
it takes bravery and heart full of will
give it up? no, i'm trying still
i'm letting go
oh well, i'm convincing myself that i'm doing so
love is pain, first hand i found it out
i can stand on rooftops and still cannot shout
after the storm, silence, now, feels so loud
i'm letting go of the true gurl i used to be
believing love could set a soul free
i will not hide and i will not flee
love has smashed all the little pieces of me
i'm letting go of a stoned heart gone soft
i'm letting go of a person who has beautifully loved
i'm letting go
it's so hard you know
it takes bravery and heart full of will
give it up? no, i'm trying still
i'm letting go
oh well, i'm convincing myself that i'm doing so
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to be a crime
By SweetZsKuLLy on May 31st 2008, early morning.on topic Taken before her time
time is just a number we say
and as we do, everything we delay
i have to give it to you
it's just a number, true
but a number that controls it all
this number sets the day from the night
this number forces love to lower its light
this number tells me when i've become legal
just a number, so simple
and we don't care about numbers
for they make no difference
yet it all changes
and we refuse acceptance
when a young friend shines for the last time
when it's time for a painful goodbye
the number becomes what makes us cry
for time was too short, for now we see death to be a crime
and as we do, everything we delay
i have to give it to you
it's just a number, true
but a number that controls it all
this number sets the day from the night
this number forces love to lower its light
this number tells me when i've become legal
just a number, so simple
and we don't care about numbers
for they make no difference
yet it all changes
and we refuse acceptance
when a young friend shines for the last time
when it's time for a painful goodbye
the number becomes what makes us cry
for time was too short, for now we see death to be a crime
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god is love
By SweetZsKuLLy on May 29th 2008, late afternoon.on topic the bible says being gay is wrong(who gives a crap)
so being gay is wrong
you claim it is by the words of a holly book
can your words stay strong
if i tell you that's not the opinion professionals took?
i respect god
and his words
but the bible says nothing about being gay
it talks of cheat
and talks of lust
ask around, a lot would agree
and at the end of the day
if you still equalize a sin with a person who's gay
who are you to judge?
i thought the bible said don't judge
it said love your brother
all mankind is your brother
if you insist on it being a sin
i thought god was forgiving
why would he refuse to forgive a gay?
yet forgive you for your judgmental harsh words?
why?
that's the god you believe in?
that's not the god i believe in
god is love
you claim it is by the words of a holly book
can your words stay strong
if i tell you that's not the opinion professionals took?
i respect god
and his words
but the bible says nothing about being gay
it talks of cheat
and talks of lust
ask around, a lot would agree
and at the end of the day
if you still equalize a sin with a person who's gay
who are you to judge?
i thought the bible said don't judge
it said love your brother
all mankind is your brother
if you insist on it being a sin
i thought god was forgiving
why would he refuse to forgive a gay?
yet forgive you for your judgmental harsh words?
why?
that's the god you believe in?
that's not the god i believe in
god is love
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i ask of you
By SweetZsKuLLy on May 29th 2008, late afternoon.on topic baby, take me to the edge again
baby, take me to the edge and watch
wait and watch me breathe for the first time
i'm not asking you to push me off the edge
don't worry, you won't be carrying that guilt
but know there's only one reason for this course of action i'm taking
and the answer is in the eyes that stare back at you in your mirror
everyday how can you live with yourself?
or don't you see under your nose? don't you realize
that everything you say and do has already killed me?
and words keep on piling and piling up
until my heart meets a stop
that is when i ask of you:
baby, take me to the edge again
and this time plz let me fall
i need to end the misery that you've caused
wait and watch me breathe for the first time
i'm not asking you to push me off the edge
don't worry, you won't be carrying that guilt
but know there's only one reason for this course of action i'm taking
and the answer is in the eyes that stare back at you in your mirror
everyday how can you live with yourself?
or don't you see under your nose? don't you realize
that everything you say and do has already killed me?
and words keep on piling and piling up
until my heart meets a stop
that is when i ask of you:
baby, take me to the edge again
and this time plz let me fall
i need to end the misery that you've caused
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