Destructiaplecuta• Show poetry

Ok . . . I'm *still* debating whether or not I will continue to write here . . . *shrugs* . . . who knows . . . perhaps we'll see after I return from Romania . . . we'll see how I'm feeling about things then . . . and if I do return, I hopefully do so with a sunnier and brighter disposition. In the meantime I present a list of Pookie-isms . . .  Enjoy.

   * Little is twice as big as big.
   * 9 out of every 10 people are not number 1
   * A sign of a bad rule – “Because I said so!”
   * How come you never hear of a news report saying “Off duty officer killed by on duty criminal”
   * Do you ever wonder what it’s like when you aren’t there?
   * I saw a kid’s shuttle van today and thought - - - wouldn’t it be nice if we were able to have an adult shuttle van without the premonition of retarded passengers?
   * There aren’t many Chinese guys named Rusty
   * At the grocery store I’ve always wanted to walk away with someone else’s cart and see if they actually say “That’s my stuff”
   * What do cats do on their day off?
   * I can’t wait till I’m 90 - - - once again I can have someone changing my diaper and I get to squirt them in the face - - - I miss that.
   * Did you ever notice that the sicker you get the harder it is to remember if you took your medicine?
   * Have you really ever seen a children’s zoo?  I think it would be entertaining.
   * Some see the glass as half full, some see the glass as half empty.  I see the glass as too big.
   * It’s a sad thing to see an Indian wearing a cowboy hat.
   * It’s impossible to know accurately how you look in your sunglasses.
   * When I hear a person talking about political solutions I know I am not listening to a serious person.
   * Eventually there will come a time when everyone is in a band.
   * I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don’t have as many people who believe it.
   * In comic strips the person on the left always speaks first.
   * The reason they call it the American Dream is because you have to be asleep to believe it.
   * A lot of those people who say they keep a gun at home for safety are the same ones who refuse to wear a seat belt.
   * What exactly do you do when the Dalai Lama appears on “60 Minutes” and you’re not satisfied with his answers?
   * Now that we’re grown up we never get to “wave bye-bye” anymore.
   * When I think about all those people who believe Elvis is alive - - I realize that if he were to show up all those people would rush him and end up smothering him to death. - - - - - - I do so love irony.
   * No one can ever know for sure what a deserted area looks like.
   * What goes through a birds mind when he finds himself flying through a fireworks display.
   * “Meow” means “woof” in cat.
   * What year did Jesus think it was?
   * Life is a near death experience.
   * When blowing out your birthday candles, suppose you wish for one candle to stay lit.  Is it possible for your wish to come true?
   * I wonder how different the world would be if Hitler had not been turned down when he applied to art school.
   * If honesty is the best policy, then dishonesty is the second best policy.  Second is not all that bad.
   * We use the sun to make electricity, and then we use the electricity to operate sun lamps and tanning beds.
   * For some reason it’s hard to picture butterflies doing it.