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Gathering Bone Fragments with Chopsticks

November is here and in Japan, when there has been a death in the family, notices are sent out at this time of year to say that no New Year's card will be coming...

I am looking for narratives about your own experiences with a death in the family or someone very close to you and the customs you observed.

Thank you.

Contest is Over

  • Contest was judged on November 18
  • Rewards: Gold: 500, Silver: 200, Bronze: 100, Honorable mention: 1 people
  • Final notes:
    Thank you and best wishes for 2010. The winning narratives were all fascinating and quirky in their own ways; I had a hard time deciding the order.

    And now if you'd like, you can join me in the heavens: http://allpoetry.com/contest/2466987

Entries [12]

1 - 12 of 12
  • She told me her granddaughter
    now a convert to Islam came down
    by fanniesson 46 lines, 6 comments, on Nov 6 7:06 AM
    Silver trophy winner
    • Commented on by judge.
  • Said when a kid,
    they laid the dead out
    by fanniesson 46 lines, 4 comments, on Nov 9 12:47 AM
    • Commented on by judge.
  • The coffin by the altar waits
    for all who knew him to attend
    by ea 18 lines, 4 comments, on Nov 9 2:15 AM
    • Viewed by judge.
  • You slipped away from me over the phone
    telling me you were going; I let you go
    by ea 35 lines, 8 comments, on Nov 10 1:57 AM
    • Viewed by judge.
  • I have a bone to pick with you,
    But I am not irreverent.
    by hendiadys 21 lines, 3 comments, on Nov 10 5:14 AM
    • Commented on by judge.
  • She moistens her lips in the age old custom of
    Matsugo-no-mizu. The shrine near her bed is
    by redmoonnrizing 50 lines, 8 comments, on Sep 22 4:21 PM
    • Commented on by judge. Prewrite
  • "Come on, let's go and look
    at all these old graves."
    by Judith Chandler 24 lines, 7 comments, on Nov 11 12:26 PM
    Honorable mention
    • Commented on by judge.
  • We were a family
    Of few traditions
    by Budart 64 lines, 3 comments, on Nov 12 3:15 PM. In Life, death, memory
    Gold trophy winner
    • Commented on by judge.
  • The incense was burning and
    I could not bear the smell and the chants
    by glazecovered 40 lines, 2 comments, on Nov 12 8:24 AM
    • Commented on by judge.
  • by Starswhispers 61 lines, 6 comments, on Nov 15 9:05 PM. In Thoughts, Spiritual, Life, Personal, Pain, Contest
    Bronze trophy winner
    • Commented on by judge.
  • That boy who I love most found a bone in the forest.
    They took it home and it sat on their shelf.
    by Mortal 7 lines, 2 comments, on Nov 17 11:30 AM
    • Commented on by judge.
  • I felt the lurk of tair,
    that whispered melodies that became vibrant and envious
    by AzraelSeraphiel 58 lines, 1 comment, on Nov 17 3:15 PM
    • Commented on by judge.

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Comments

1 - 11 of 11
  • Asabouros.
    November 4
    Edit | Reply
    That was a very informative read, I'm glad I took the time to check it out. I wish you the best of luck with your contest, it's very interesting. :]


  • The Dark Writer
    November 4
    Edit | Reply

    hi

    I found this very interesting to read too, thanks for sharing and hope your contest goes well. All the best


  • redmoonnrizing silver member
    November 5
    Edit | Reply
    Interesting that I wrote a poem on this same subject about a month or so ago. I read that burial plots are at a premium in Japan. Some companies have communal grave sites for their employees so that they can have a place to spread the ashes of their loved ones.

    Many now choose to be cremated. The burning takes about 2 hours and when it is done they wait for the remains to cool and the family members use chopsticks to remove any bone fragments that are left and put them in a type of urn. The ashes are also put into an urn and taken to wherever the family wishes to release them.

    I found my research very interesting on this subject.

    • ea silver member
      November 5
      Edit | Reply
      The chopstick detail really struck me but so did some of the other customs mentioned here, like the wearing of a white patch at the back of your neck to keep the spirit of the deceased from seeing you and wanting to take you with.

      We are not allowed to spread the ashes where I live in Germany. And I was surprised to learn that the gravestones generally get dug up in a matter of 20-30 years and the gravesite, reused, except in cases where they are protected for historical reasons. A woman whose funeral we attended was not buried next to her husband because he had died over 35 years ago and his gravestone was gone.


  • bird-mad girl
    November 5
    Edit | Reply
    wow that's interesting. I'll see what I can do, but it'll be hard. my family is kind of blank when it comes to death. these past two years when I told my mom about two of my friends dying she didn't say anything to me so I didn't bother telling her about the other two.

    • ea silver member
      November 6
      Edit | Reply
      If you went to the funerals, I would like to hear details about that, exactly what was done, said, how it was handled, either a straightforward telling in prose or with more poetic imput in free verse. You can talk about how you felt about it all, too, of course. I remember going to a suicide's funeral in the East Village once and was surprised how formal it was, nothing funky, though it was a young artist. I think sometimes people just give it all over to the funeral director when it's someone young, because they haven't left any wishes on how to handle it.


  • Nickelspring gold member
    November 13
    Edit | Reply
    How did I miss this one? I hope to be able to enter before it closes, great contest.
    Kris

    • ea silver member
      November 15
      Edit | Reply
      Let me know if you need more time.

  • Judith Chandler
    November 18
    Edit | Reply
    thank you for the HM.

1 - 11 of 11