Can poems be torture? YES! I am sure of it because when I recite poetry, my family screams, "NO NO NO! STOP!" And if I do NOT stop, they get REALLY mad and run out of the room. 
This contest is inspired by yesterday's news in which we are informed that the U.S. government uses music to torture terrorist prisoners. The prison people play mad music over and over with the promise that the music will stop if the prisoners confess. Some of the bands that created the music are angry that their music is used this way, but others are very flattered.
No, I am not condoning torture. Get that?
Your job is to write a poem that is so annoying, it could be considered torture to listen to it. I think rhyming poetry does this best, judging from how my family reacts. Even without drums or bass, I am convinced that poetry can be torture.
So do your part, OK? Maybe your poem could be put to good use, such as recorded and played in a room where high school students are having detention.
RULES:
Nothing erotic or with awful words that will make my computer bleep. 
Contest is Over
- Contest was judged on December 12, 2008
- Rewards: Gold: 400, Silver: 150, Bronze: 100
- Final notes: I have HUGE admiration to all of you who came to this contest! Your torture poems are fabulous. The judging that I did proves that life is not fair because so many poets deserved the GOLD! I want to thank you for displaying your sense of humor and not telling me that I am evil for wanting poems that torture. lol You caught the spirit of crazy fun and ran with it.
Contest Winners
Gold trophy winner
Silver trophy winner
Entries [11]
1 - 11 of 11
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You, my bunch, are the peach of my tree,
The nut in my Snickers™,by BlancetNoir 17 lines, 7 comments, on Dec 11 11:33 AM 2008• Commented on by judge. -
So you think you know
you're so full of snow• Commented on by judge. -
by Black Narcissus 18 lines, 5 comments, on Dec 11 12:21 PM 2008. In Contest• Commented on by judge.
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Under duress you will confess,
my rhyme can go on a long time.• Commented on by judge. -
They are happy here on Earth!
Some of them are giving birth!• Commented on by judge. Prewrite -
I'm banished to the Land of Rippers!
There's nothing much around these parts...• Commented on by judge. Prewrite -
by SoldierOfTheCross 60 lines, 2 comments, on Dec 11 11:26 PM 2008• Commented on by judge.
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Every sort of underwear is mandated in the rules! Boys must wear their underwear to any sort of schools!by Blossom Fairy 10 lines, 4 comments, on Sep 28 11:21 PM 2007. In Humor• Commented on by judge. Prewrite
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Comments
1 - 23 of 23
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lol...very hitchhikers' guide to the galaxy
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That piece of news is really funny.
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I think the criterion applies to ALL of my poems, particularly my imitation of Lisa Jarnot!
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How 'bout another poem in Latin?
Great contest!
Annie
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Sure, a poem in Latin would be especially maddening.
BUT, it should have lots of wild repetition that drives you nuts to listen to, I think. 
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Hmmmmm, I am no good at rhyme, but I think this is a fine idea for a contest! May have to try to think on it, and see what I can come up with.
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so have corporate composers to the public for years. Djs being the gastapo
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You did this once before didn't you? I was going to enter my entry for the last one you don't allow prewrites. =[ Can I PLEASE enter my last entry? lol
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I think this is sick.
Suggesting, even in jest, that torture be used on another human being is disgusting and should disturb anyone who has any sense of right and wrong.
I don't think this is at all appropriate. -
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You are taking this far too serious. Yes, torture is a horrendous thing. But we aren't here to torture anyone, nor are we jesting about torture. It is simply a poetry contest on a poetry website.
The contest isn't a sick or inappropriate thing. If someone wrote a poem that was gruesomely horrendous defining actual torture more than the concept if the contests point, THAT MIGHT be a little over the edge.
Either way, it's just a poetry contest on a poetry website. This isn't promoting torture and it's not trying to downplay how bad it truly is. It's just a contest on a website.
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Relax. This is torture in jest. Children think they are being tortured when they have to pick up their toys. Did you not catch on that I was joking about how my poetry is torture to my family when they have to listen to it being recited? My contest is for writing poems that would drive you nuts to listen to. That's all.
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I love your crazy contests, my rhyme is definitely a crime! The news feature that prompted this contest is not funny. The " mad music" is played at so many decibels that the pain is excruciating. Along with all the other sadistic methods of torture it makes one wonder how many prisoners are tried on the basis of breaking under torture and confessing hoping for respite when innocent. The eardrums can burst and bleed and partial loss of hearing can be permanent. Enough seriousness, I especially like that from the darkness of those deeds you add light and ask for tortuous poetry for lighthearted lampooning. I simply must write the worst rhyme in the world, it is not easy on the eye let alone given breath to. Though I am almost tempted to enter it would be so wrong to find in the future that those poets sent to detention were nearly demented by the crime rhyme fermented!
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lol.
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Vanilla ice did it better than I ever could.
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I find it rather disgusting that they would use art to abuse
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kibo no hikari...
On the face of it, it is rather disgusting to use art to abuse, yet the irony for me here is that we may have become so desensitised to the word abuse, to hearing about torture and the various weapons of choice that perhaps the shock factor here is some see the mirror reflecting the abuse of art and others see torture by whatever means as abuse as shocking. It's such a thought provoking concept and I am glad the contest holder isn't promoting it per se nor making light of it.
Enough of my babbling like a brook, hope you didn't mind my responding to your thoughts
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Art is constantly used for abuse. Art shows are full of crap. It's all how you look at it. I see this contest as promoting poems that are so silly, they'd drive you nuts to listen to them.
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so hitchhikers guide!
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Thank you! I love Hitchhiker's Guide. lol
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I think this contest could've been done without the reference to the newspaper article. That's where the problem lies. Silly poems to drive people mad, is in itself not a problem and can be a fun idea for a contest. But, why the need to allign it with this headline? The headline does not add anything to the nature of the contest. Perhaps you could remove this unecessary reference seeing as a number of people have found it disturbing and offensive.
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I work for a newspaper, so the news is a big part of my life. My newspaper columns (I am a well-known newspaper columnist in the West) probably offend some people, too, so I'm used to it.
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Melodies...
Thankyou very much indeed for the Silver and for hosting the crazy contest! Congratulations to Artis for Gold and regal777 for Bronze and to everyone else, I smiled at all the entries I read and laughed so much at one that it actually hurt!
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Aye, the entries spun out laughs aplenty! Amazing talent on display in this mad contest. Thank you for supporting the laughing that was my intention here.
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