okay...rules first:
1) No Prewrites.
2) No outright porn. Erotic is cool, but please label appropriately.
3) Left Align.
4) Please read the rules.
5) No excessive swearing.
6) Nothing over 60 lines. (unless it's truly brilliant)
You may enter more than once, but if you do, please use a different option for each entry.
Please post your name and the option/option number in your Author Notes.
I really like ultra creativity! I really don't like having to get my dictionary out! Go wild (As long as it's within the rules!)!
OPTIONS:
1) People sometimes inquire what form of government is most suitable for an artist to live under. To this question there is only one answer. The form of government that is most suitable to the artist is no government at all.
Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)
"The Soul of Man Under Socialism"
Fortnightly Review
London, February 1891
2) Bullshit is a rare and valuable commodity. The great masters have all been bullshitters. Horseshit, on the other hand, in the common parlance, refers to downright crap. The free, playful entertaining flight of ideas is bullshit; and more often than not will be found afterwards to accord perfectly with universal truth. Horseshit is contrived; derivative, superstitious, ignorant.
Art Kleps (d.1999)
3) Every fight is a food fight when you’re a cannibal.
-- Demetri Martin
4) It kills you to see them grow up. But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't. ~Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams
5) Minor vices lead to major ones, but minor virtues stay put. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966
6) The Anglo-Saxon conscience doesn't keep you from doing what you shouldn't; it just keeps you from enjoying it. ~Salvador de Madariaga
7) The young always have the same problem - how to rebel and conform at the same time. They have now solved this by defying their parents and copying one another. ~Quentin Crisp
8) Adolescence: A stage between infancy and adultery. ~Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911
9) You have ONE advantage over me.....you can kiss my ass and I can't!! - Anon
10) There is a light at the end of every tunnel....just pray it's not a train!. - Anon
11) "Even If It Kills Me, I'm Gonna Smile." - Anon
12) "Money can't buy happiness... But it sure makes misery easier to live with..." - Anon
13) "If you learn from your mistakes, then why ain't I a genius ?!" - Anon
14) "I think they should put a warning label on strawberries: 'Caution: tastes nothing like a strawberry milkshake'." — Ryan Kaplan.
15) "Around here, we put the FUN in dysFUNctional." - Anon
16) "Thank you, but I have other plans."
— Response to "Have a nice day" suggested by Paul Fussel.
17) I like hearing myself talk. It is one of my greatest pleasures. I often have long conversations all by myself and I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying. -- Oscar Wilde
18) "It's best to keep computer nerds away from gun enthusiasts. Sooner or
later they will figure out what they have in common: 'point and click'" - Anon
19) “looks get you through the door, personality keeps you in the room” Shaina
20) Your ingenuity continues to astonish me... I never knew it was possible to achieve such incompetence. - Anon
1) No Prewrites.
2) No outright porn. Erotic is cool, but please label appropriately.
3) Left Align.
4) Please read the rules.
5) No excessive swearing.
6) Nothing over 60 lines. (unless it's truly brilliant)
You may enter more than once, but if you do, please use a different option for each entry.
Please post your name and the option/option number in your Author Notes.
I really like ultra creativity! I really don't like having to get my dictionary out! Go wild (As long as it's within the rules!)!
OPTIONS:
1) People sometimes inquire what form of government is most suitable for an artist to live under. To this question there is only one answer. The form of government that is most suitable to the artist is no government at all.
Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)
"The Soul of Man Under Socialism"
Fortnightly Review
London, February 1891
2) Bullshit is a rare and valuable commodity. The great masters have all been bullshitters. Horseshit, on the other hand, in the common parlance, refers to downright crap. The free, playful entertaining flight of ideas is bullshit; and more often than not will be found afterwards to accord perfectly with universal truth. Horseshit is contrived; derivative, superstitious, ignorant.
Art Kleps (d.1999)
3) Every fight is a food fight when you’re a cannibal.
-- Demetri Martin
4) It kills you to see them grow up. But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't. ~Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams
5) Minor vices lead to major ones, but minor virtues stay put. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966
6) The Anglo-Saxon conscience doesn't keep you from doing what you shouldn't; it just keeps you from enjoying it. ~Salvador de Madariaga
7) The young always have the same problem - how to rebel and conform at the same time. They have now solved this by defying their parents and copying one another. ~Quentin Crisp
8) Adolescence: A stage between infancy and adultery. ~Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911
9) You have ONE advantage over me.....you can kiss my ass and I can't!! - Anon
10) There is a light at the end of every tunnel....just pray it's not a train!. - Anon
11) "Even If It Kills Me, I'm Gonna Smile." - Anon
12) "Money can't buy happiness... But it sure makes misery easier to live with..." - Anon
13) "If you learn from your mistakes, then why ain't I a genius ?!" - Anon
14) "I think they should put a warning label on strawberries: 'Caution: tastes nothing like a strawberry milkshake'." — Ryan Kaplan.
15) "Around here, we put the FUN in dysFUNctional." - Anon
16) "Thank you, but I have other plans."
— Response to "Have a nice day" suggested by Paul Fussel.
17) I like hearing myself talk. It is one of my greatest pleasures. I often have long conversations all by myself and I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying. -- Oscar Wilde
18) "It's best to keep computer nerds away from gun enthusiasts. Sooner or
later they will figure out what they have in common: 'point and click'" - Anon
19) “looks get you through the door, personality keeps you in the room” Shaina
20) Your ingenuity continues to astonish me... I never knew it was possible to achieve such incompetence. - Anon
Contest is Over
- Contest was judged on June 6, 2008
- Rewards: Gold: 364, Silver: 364, Bronze: 364
- Final notes: Hi all, firstly I want to say thank you so much for taking the time to enter my contest. I really appreciate it.
Unfortunately I have been having so many hassles with my internet...although *hopefully* that will be fixed by monday...anyways, due to the lack of response for this contest, I was just going to close it and delete it...BUT I thought, that since you had taken the time to actually write a poem, and enter it, I would just divide the points up equally....so I hope that's okay....I know I haven't commented on your poems, but as soon as my internet is up and running properly again (At the moment it's booting me off at random moments...so annoying!) I will be back, and I will comment on your poems!
Again, a REALLY big thank you!
Luck.
Contest Winners
-
I cried when her first tooth came in And did the same when she lost it.• Viewed by judge. [remove]
-
there's everything to do
and nothing to be done.by WritingWretch 29 lines, 4 comments, on May 24 5:30 PM 2008. In Humor, Life, Sardonic response.
Silver trophy winner
• Viewed by judge. [remove] -
Every time we swear it's just for one more night.
(Harder and harder to breathe)• Viewed by judge. [remove]
Gold trophy winner
Bronze trophy winner
Entries [3]
Add a comment
Comments
-
Uhmm posting your name in the authors notes defeets the anonymity of the contest.
-
-
It's because I'm allowing more than one entry, so I like to know who's entering more than once....
-
-
Thoughts
I think it'll be wise if you were to add the quoter's name(s) to the quote they said..just in case someone might accuse you of plagiarizing when you might not be.
Just thought you'd know that
Adding your comment:
