Further update: 13.v.2008
I have now checked the various comments made by competitors on fellow-competitors entries. Since these comments are, in my opinion, a major part of the competition, I thought it might be appropriate to provide some feedback on them, Hence the following notes:
There was a good response during the commenting period on this competition - i.e. the period AFTER the competition had been judged. Unfortunately, there was some misunderstanding about this and a few people began commenting on the poems immediately after the competition had closed. This was doubtless partly my fault for not making things 100% clear – and the fact that I could not complete judging before going into hospital and was rather unwell afterwards, which delayed things further. However, it did mean that a few people seem to have revised their work in response to the said comments before I had had a chance to complete the judging. Which, I fear, rather undercuts the principle that a competition should be for the entrants’ own unaided work! Luckily, on this occasion, I had in fact made copies of the original submissions (in case I found myself detained in hospital longer than I had supposed) – and I was therefore still able to judge the poems AS SUBMITTED! One poet – alas- withdrew her entry before the commenting period was over – on the grounds that some other entrants had her on their “ignore” lists and would not therefore have commented on her work anyway.!The fact that this could have meant other people losing points for comments on her work did not seem to bother her. Well, as I warned, she loses her additional “place” points, plus points due to her for the commenting she did! As to the comments themselves – most of them were pertinent and (as requested) in good English, avoiding the slang and jargon that mars so much of the Allpoetry discourse. There were, alas, a few lapses: PLEASE remember that “write” is NOT normally considered to be a noun… If you think that something does not deserve the term “poem”, then call it a “piece of writing” or an “entry” – rather than a “write”. For if poets and would-be poets do not cherish the language, then who will? Likewise, doubtless due to haste, there were a few grammatical slips in the comments. In particular, some people seem to have trouble in remembering the difference between (and correct usage of) “like” and “as”. And PLEASE – try to avoid the expression “sharing” poetry. This has acquired rather negative overtones – suggesting the kind of cosy little ego-boosting groups of “writers” who have no wish to expose their work to the real (but sometimes harsh!) world of publishing, but simply to read it to each other, and luxuriate in each other’s praises… Some comments on the winning pair of poems revealed a certain confusion between “free verse” and “sprung rhythm” – a confusion which apparently extended to the author himself. (Well, that is no detriment to him – some of the greatest poets have achieved their effects without being aware of the “rules” of what they were writing – even, according to Aristotle, the greatest of Greek tragedians – Aeschylus! And St Thomas Aquinas “accidentally” wrote the first known limerick in the middle of one of his prayers!). So, please note, the winning pair are in SPRUNG RHYTHM - in which STRESS, not syllable count is the determining factor. If you are confused about “sprung rhythm”, it might help to look up the writing of Gerard Manley Hopkins, in an edition which has a preface explaining his technique. PENGUIN brought out a very good one some years ago! Others queried whether the second-placed pair were sufficiently celebratory. To me – at least – they belonged here – at least in the sense of the recital of Burns’ “Grace” before a banquet, or the old custom of the “poor-folks’ platter” on the banquet table. (For further comment see my reply under the entry itself). The “gloom and doom” I wanted people to avoid was the kind of subjective self-pity that pervades so much of the Allpoetry output. I have allotted 25 points for each valid comment (i.e. grammatically written, relevant, meaningful – and made at the proper time).
I shall comment on all entries that fulfilled the basic requirements of the competition in due course…. Provided that they remain on the competition site. But it may take a little time.
Thank you for entering this competition!
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I have had two books published virtually simultaneously - translations of 19th century classic poets, one from Belarusian and one from Ukrainian.
It is some time since I have had two books appear so close together (the last occasion was in July, 1971.. so I felt I should celebrate this fact with you.
Belarus and Ukraine are contiguous countries, their languages are - more or less - mutually intelligible - though there ARE one or two traps (e.g. the Ukrainian word "blahyi" is a high-style word for "very good", while in Belarusian "blahy" means "bad"!), and have much (but not all) of their history in common.
The poet Volodymyr Sosyura compared them to two sisters - one dark-eyed, one blue-eyed.
Hence the title of this competition.
RULES:
1. SUBJECT AND FORM.
What I require is a pair of poems on two related themes. The poems must be in the same verse-form (if you write free verse, the length and stressing of each line in poem "A" must be replicated in poem "B".)Each of the pair must be able to stand alone - but at the same time, the two together must together form an entity.
Hence the two should be submitted in the same entry - not, repeat NOT, separately.
If you are interested in form, you might like to try a "dyad" - which is a pair of poems as described above, with the additional refinement that the end words of corresponding lines must be identical.
And, do remember, that this is a celebration - so avoid "gloom and doom" themes.
2. LENGTH:
No restrictions, provided that your entry coincides with rule 1.
3. PREWRITTEN work. I do not suppose that many people will have a suitable pair of poems in stock - but it you DO have, then they are more than welcome... and you will receive bonus points.
Likewise, anyone who recycles a prewrtten poem by writing a new "sister" poem for it will receive a bonus. (Put in your pair of poems as a new entry - but state in the Author's Notes box which of them is "prewritten")
4. NUMBER OF ENTRIES.
As many as you wish.
5. FORMAT.
My sight is NOT good at present. So, PLEASE: black typing on a PLAIN white or at the worst pale pastel background. No fancy background designs, and PLEASE no sparklers or flashing lights.
Likewise, no illustrations, nor fancy borders. (These, as far as I am concerned, signal that the writer does not have sufficient confidence in his/her work to allow it to stand on its own merits).
6. AUTHOR'S NOTES. Apart from the information requested in Rule 3, this box should if possible be left empty. If you feel you MUST use it, e.g. to explain a dialect word or an obscure historical reference, then -, well, use it! But do remember that a poem should as far as possible be autonomous and self-explanatory.
7. "NO PEEKING" convention. As usual, I ask request entrants NOT to read entries by other poets (and a fortiori NOT to comment on them) until the competition is over and judged. There will be a "commenting period" after the results are announced, during which entrants can gain bonus points by commenting on other people's work.
8. CLOSING DATE.
This was originally 5 March. However, I really do find it miserable having to judge competitions with very few entries. I should like there to be at least 100 - but realize that this may be over optimistic. Hence I have extended the closing date, and will continue to do so in the hope of getting at least 50 entries. It will now close on 24 April...
9. POINTS. At present I am putting in only the minimum 300 points to launch the competition. Other points will be decided on merit - but I hope that at least entries 2 - 9 will be of a standard to merit them.
And as this is a celebratory competition, there will be a "glass of virtual champagne" (50 points) for each poet who enters an eligible pair of poems formatted as per rule 5. (NB. for each POET, not each ENTRY).
And a further 50 points for anyone who manages a dyad!
PLEASE NOTE THAT I SHALL NOT BE OPENING ANY ENTRIES UNTIL AFTER THE COMPETITION CLOSES. And , PLEASE - I do not want to see any "preview" lines from your entry - as I may from time to time be checking the page to see how many people have entered - and I find that find seeing isolated lines in advance spoil their impact when I come to read the poem itself. PLEASE use the option that eliminates these - i.e. by typing '.' in the relevant box.
I look forward to receiving your entries.
Contest is Over
- Contest was judged on May 2
- Rewards: Gold: 300, Silver: 75, Bronze: 50, Honorable mention: 20 people
- Final notes: This has been a very difficult competition to judge - apart from a "tail" of entries that showed a total misunderstanding of the rules - most of the poems submitted had much to commend them...
At the same time, many that were fine work in the absolute sense did not really fit the format of the competition - sometimes the two poems were so closely linked that the second was not really able to stand alone without the first, or, conversely, although the two poems had related themes, there was no sense of complementarity so that the pair became something greater than the sum of its individual parts. And then, how was one to balance the greater technical perfection of some entries against others which, though less polished, nevertheless evoked more profoundly that icy finger at the base of the skull which is the frisson of true poetry?
Well - I have done my best... and the placings are as follows:
And the points will be awarded as follows...
However... except for the minimum to make the "system" work, you will NOT get your points now. For NOW comes the period for commenting on other people's entries.
There will be additional points for every meaningful (and grammatical!) comment made on one of the "placed" entries beween now and next Thursday/Friday midnight (8/9 May). However, in the past, some people have spoiled other contestants chances of points by removing their poems prematurely. So what you will get NOW is only 300 points for first place.75 for 2nd, 50 for 3rd...and whatever the minimum is for a "green trophy" - and the rest will be distributed AFTER the commenting period closes - to all those people who have left their poems available for comment. I am sorry if this seems a bit schoolmarmish - but I really am tired of a few people spoiling things for others!
Anyway, here is the list...
1: Lyndon: All in the Bronzed Evening/All in the Bitter Cold: 1000 points
2.Keith: Two Sisters: 500 points
3. Hoodoo Lover: On the edge 300 points...
Commended: Summa Cum Laude 200 points apiece:
Mairi Bheag: Seasonal II
Sprite: Under the stars
Commended: Magna Cum Laude 100 points apiece
Angel Seeker: Within the darkness
Bazza: Aussie Pipers
Cricketjeff: Two ladies one idea:
Individuality: Day and Night
Mairi Bheag: In my house you'll find
Mairi Bheag:Seasonal
Mairi Bheag: The song of girls
MargaretG Comparing Apples and Oranges
Peteskid: Fragrance
Sprite: Repast in the afternoon
Waydownuponjoy: Two sisters
Commended: Cum Laude 75 points each
AngelSeeker: To Erato and Erato's reply
Darianna: Mother and Child'
Deer-catcher: Reflections and Sanctuary
Peteskid: Forever
Honourable Mention:50 points each:
Gray Fairy: Writing a Poem:
Lozfan03: Time and Walking to Futility,
Slavekitten: Prewritten poems
Contest Winners
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by Keith 32 lines, 15 comments, on Mar 11 2:52 PM. In Life, Society, Contemporary
Silver trophy winner
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• Commented on by judge. Prewrite [remove]
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Entered in Vera Rich's "Two Sisters" contestby AngelSeeker 43 lines, 9 comments, on Dec 31 11:14 AM 2006. In Life, Spiritual, Personal
Honorable winner• Commented on by judge. Prewrite [remove] -
• Viewed by judge. Prewrite [remove]
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• Commented on by judge. [remove]
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• Viewed by judge. [remove]
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NB if you intend to enter Vera Rich's "Two Sisters" please do not read until after the judging.• Commented on by judge. [remove]
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Vera Rich contest poem• Commented on by judge. Prewrite [remove]
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REFLECTIONS and SANCTUARY by deercatcher on March 3, 2006. © All rights reservedby deercatcher 47 lines, 9 comments, on May 1 8:59 PM
Honorable winner• Commented on by judge. [remove] -
by Peteskid 40 lines, 10 comments, on Apr 22 9:14 PM. In Form: free verse - paired theme.
Honorable winner• Commented on by judge. [remove] -
Prayer to the Goddess ((Which one to choose)) (sister 1) Love Sent from aboveby Slavekitten 67 lines, 2 comments, on Apr 25 12:07 AM
Honorable winner• Commented on by judge. [remove] -
I don't want to write a poem about you• Commented on by judge. [remove]
Gold trophy winner
Bronze trophy winner
Entries [36]
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The Question. The Answer.by antoinettedarling 39 lines, 4 comments, on Apr 5 5:18 AM• Commented on by judge.
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by Jade Andrea 35 lines, 4 comments, on Oct 23 11:16 PM 2007• Viewed by judge. Prewrite
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Philip was a quiet boy who didn’t have much to say
He was told he was adopted on his twenty first birthdayby judmc 24 lines, 20 comments, on Apr 20 5:17 PM• Commented on by judge. Prewrite -
As a child wer’e taught to treat the animals as friends Then we find to our dismay that the friendship all dependsby judmc 24 lines, 4 comments, on Apr 7 11:23 AM• Commented on by judge. Prewrite
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NONEby LanguishedLad 43 lines, 3 comments, on Feb 15 11:44 PM. In Abuse, Sad, Sadness, Depression, Message, Freewrite, Dark, Pain• Commented on by judge. Prewrite
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by LanguishedLad 45 lines, 3 comments, on Feb 15 11:46 PM. In Suicide, Depressed, Death, Sadness, lost innocence• Viewed by judge. Prewrite
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by Jade Andrea 38 lines, 1 comment, on Apr 23 5:57 AM• Viewed by judge. Prewrite
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I’m an ordinary rat Who lives undergroundby judmc 47 lines, 16 comments, on Apr 9 6:54 AM• Viewed by judge. Prewrite
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O! for those autumn days of fun
When jack frost came upon the sceneby judmc 16 lines, 7 comments, on Apr 23 7:45 AM• Viewed by judge. -
a magic smile as a reverie
Oh!a life full of revelry• Viewed by judge. Prewrite -
SMILE-ONCE MORE
smile caressing your lips• Viewed by judge. Prewrite
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Comments
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Intriguing concept. I shall give this some thought.
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I wrote a pair of sonnets that go together, but two different types of sonnets. I wouldn't suppose that is what you are looking for right? Anyway this is a really neat contest. Have fun. I don't know how you draw people into your contests so well but I am impressed. All the best! Duana
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I don't want
to do this -
i have poems reposted, done in the ivan franko continantal sonnet style, are these acceptable for this contest?
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Thank you for the honor of the bronze placement, and for hosting a great contest, I shall begin commenting soon...
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Thank you for the opportunity to stretch our skills and to be measured against the finest at AP.
Congratulations to Ron, Keith and hoodoolover, and all the poets who placed for mention.
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An entry eliminated in error and returned.
Sincere apologies.
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