A Dying Art

Enter this contest!

Hello, all! In case you haven't noticed, I'm hosting a contest and I'd love for you to enter it. I have always been a fan of satires. I absolutely love them, but one day I stumbled across a quote from The Devil's Dictionary by Ambrose Bierce. This is how he defined satire:

SATIRE, n.
An obsolete kind of literary composition in which the vices and follies of the author's enemies were expounded with imperfect tenderness. In this country satire never had more than a sickly and uncertain existence, for the soul of it is wit, wherein we are dolefully deficient, the humor that we mistake for it, like all humor, being tolerant and sympathetic. Moreover, although Americans are "endowed by their Creator" with abundant vice and folly, it is not generally known that these are reprehensible qualities, wherefore the satirist is popularly regarded as a soul-spirited knave, and his ever victim's outcry for codefendants evokes a national assent.

Long, I know, but blame him for that not me. The word that concerned me was 'obsolete'. So here's what I want: prove him wrong. Write me a satire.

~Rules~
1. It can be poetry or prose, I don't care, just make it good.
2. I AM allowing bad grammar and spelling, as well as chat speak, sticky caps, and other such nonsense. Why? So you can write a satire over such things, if your satire has nothing to do with these things then don't use any of the above, got it.
3. Sorry, no erotica or highly adult material. If you want to write a satire about sexuality, find another way to do it. I don't like erotica and have blocked it.
4. Profanity is allowed only if you're writing a satire about it.
5. No prewrites.

I think that's about it. Satire is a big topic, allowing for almost anything. I'm hoping for a lot of entries. You will be notified if you are in violation of any of the rules and given a chance to correct the problem, if you don't you will be DQed. Editting is allowed until the contest closes, but don't think that means you're allowed to slack off until the day before. I think that's everything. If you have any questions or need more time, then message me or my co-host, SweetXDestiny who I like to thank for donating a truckload (a large truckload at that) of points and for helping with the contest. Good luck.

I am now allowing prewrites due to persistent pleading (meaning one person asked me politely and gave me a good reason to). So, prewrites! Also, I didn't mention it earlier, but you can enter as many time as you want. I won't let you win more than one trophy though.