You may submit your favorite poem on AllPoetry.
The Catches:
You must be willing to submit to intense criticism and heavy poetic critiquing. If your poem is in any way mediocre, I will tell you how and why it is so.
Rules:
No poems outside the realm of Allpoetry. (How can I give Edgar Allen Poe points if he is DEAD?)
No one under 18 may enter this contest. I do not particularly care for minors, nor their hyper-sensitive poems or delicate sensibilities. Additionally, Adult/Erotica poems will be permitted.
No Crying. I don't want sissies in my contest who are unable to endure my advice/ or critiquing.
No Lovey-Dovey Mushy Poems. Many of these poems are sensitive in nature and are often dear to the poet who wrote it, so I don't want to offend anybody...
No Intensely Sad Poems.
No "The World Hates Me and I Cut Myself to Ease the Pain" poems or any derivatives of "Emo" poetry. Sarah MacLaughlan (I don't know the correct spelling of her name, I should die) type poems are acceptable, but Hawthorn Heights-type poems are NOT.
Actually, I don't care for those poems or the poets who write them at all. Unless you are absolutely convinced the poem has any merit, DO NOT waste my time by submitting them. I will have to kill you...slowly.
No Humorous Poems. Please.
My Promises and Obligations to YOU, the Contestant:
I promise to give you an insightful, deep critique of your poem. I will not give you anything less than 75 words of criticism.
I promise to be fair. If your poem is mediocre, I will not (immediately) disqualify you from the contest. I will even give you ONE chance to submit another poem.
I promise not to waste my time or yours on bullshit.
Yes, I am an asshole. What gives me the right to invite people to submit their favorite poems except the ones that I don't want? What gives me the authority to critique and criticize other poets' work?
God. God and the points I earned to start this contest.
The Catches:
You must be willing to submit to intense criticism and heavy poetic critiquing. If your poem is in any way mediocre, I will tell you how and why it is so.
Rules:
No poems outside the realm of Allpoetry. (How can I give Edgar Allen Poe points if he is DEAD?)
No one under 18 may enter this contest. I do not particularly care for minors, nor their hyper-sensitive poems or delicate sensibilities. Additionally, Adult/Erotica poems will be permitted.
No Crying. I don't want sissies in my contest who are unable to endure my advice/ or critiquing.
No Lovey-Dovey Mushy Poems. Many of these poems are sensitive in nature and are often dear to the poet who wrote it, so I don't want to offend anybody...
No Intensely Sad Poems.
No "The World Hates Me and I Cut Myself to Ease the Pain" poems or any derivatives of "Emo" poetry. Sarah MacLaughlan (I don't know the correct spelling of her name, I should die) type poems are acceptable, but Hawthorn Heights-type poems are NOT.
Actually, I don't care for those poems or the poets who write them at all. Unless you are absolutely convinced the poem has any merit, DO NOT waste my time by submitting them. I will have to kill you...slowly.
No Humorous Poems. Please.
My Promises and Obligations to YOU, the Contestant:
I promise to give you an insightful, deep critique of your poem. I will not give you anything less than 75 words of criticism.
I promise to be fair. If your poem is mediocre, I will not (immediately) disqualify you from the contest. I will even give you ONE chance to submit another poem.
I promise not to waste my time or yours on bullshit.
Yes, I am an asshole. What gives me the right to invite people to submit their favorite poems except the ones that I don't want? What gives me the authority to critique and criticize other poets' work?
God. God and the points I earned to start this contest.
Contest is Over
- Contest was judged on December 27, 2007
- Rewards: Gold: 400
- Final notes: I sincerely apologize for the long wait in judging this contest. I read all the poems that met criteria at least twice and commented on all of them. If you want a more in depth critique and analysis, then message me and I will be happy to do so.
I had a hard time judging this contest, referring to all my textbooks on poetry, poesis, and analysis. I decided on the poem that sounded and read like it belonged in a scholarly poetry anthology.
Good job you. CONGRATULATIONS.
I found meritous and worthwhile reading in all the finalists work. Thank you for not making this contest as unbearable as it could have been with your absence. I invite you all to my next contests, but please give me new stuff I haven't seen before, even if they are prewrites.
Contest Winners
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And you compare my hair to almonds as it runs through• Commented on by judge. Prewrite [remove]
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Common sense
(now cordoned offby Floorboards 20 lines, 34 comments, on Aug 4 9:11 AM 2007. In Society, Thoughts
Silver trophy winner
• Commented on by judge. Prewrite [remove] -
• Viewed by judge. Prewrite [remove]
Gold trophy winner
Bronze trophy winner
Entries [23]
1 - 23 of 23
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Gallivanting past
jade thicketsby Salt Therapy 22 lines, 16 comments, on Oct 20 2:43 PM 2007• Commented on by judge. Prewrite -
The forest is so dark today
The sun cannot get through• Commented on by judge. Prewrite -
Brilliant and amazing,
she brings life and love wherever she goes.by BeautifulFlame 33 lines, 19 comments, on Jun 20 12:05 AM 2007. In Love, Life, Personal, Friendship, Inspirational, Teen issues• Commented on by judge. Prewrite -
Many times I'd made this trip
My emotions would hold me backby Pollycheck 59 lines, 75 comments, on Apr 30 4:34 AM 2006. In Personal• Commented on by judge. Prewrite -
Desires long held secret unfurl glorious revelation• Commented on by judge. Prewrite
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by tigress3737 27 lines, 6 comments, on Oct 2 10:04 PM 2007• Commented on by judge. Prewrite
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Her dress trails down a thousand stairs
Marbled, ice to her soft skin• Commented on by judge. Prewrite -
• Commented on by judge. Prewrite
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What to say? / staring at a blank page before me / ideas begin to fill my brain. / One says to write about love, / another other drags me dby Dazed N Life 33 lines, 18 comments, on May 31 5:04 AM 2007. In Expirement, Thoughts, Freewrite, Abstract• Commented on by judge. Prewrite
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Let's go away Stroll along• Commented on by judge. Prewrite
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I remember you from long ago
My snow white queenby sociaL IntollErance 19 lines, 6 comments, on Nov 28 8:33 PM 2007• Commented on by judge. Prewrite -
by Blooming Poet 17 lines, 5 comments, on Dec 1 8:03 PM 2007. In Love• Commented on by judge.
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Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Your angry rules made me so ridiculously happy I just might have to find something to enter for this.
No bullshit.
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I can't wait for a critique!
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Oh bite me
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'ello
I like the rules well enough; I'm a little "saddened" by no one over eighteen. Seventeen myself and chose to ignore that on the basis that my mental capacity is within range of eighteen the vast majority of the time. If you do reject it, though; just ensure to write a comment with enough characters for the filter to let me give you a five; Criticism is as welcomed as praise so long as the quality behind it is the same. Contest or no contest. -
Thanks a lot for the silver, much appreciated.
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