Okay, this is going to be a challenge. I want bad poetry. I want cliched, hackneyed, unoriginal poetry. I want overused images and tired concepts. I want cheap sentiments and dogmatic tracts. Don't just stoop to stupidity of the "roses are red/violets are blue" variety. Really reach for your inner cheeseball.
Here's some inspiration.
I've noticed that much of the bad poetry I read groups into the following categories:
* sappy, sentimental love poems
* gothic/pseudo-Victorian poems about vampires,
haunted castles, etc.
* poems that rehash the most vapid, sentimental
aspects of "Christianity" or "patriotism"
* cutsie-wootsie poems about babies, flowers,
springtime, etc. in which the poem is less lovely
than the thing being considered.
* "erotic" poetry that is actually just pornographic
Your poem does not have to fit into one of these categories, I just listed them to get you started. In fact, if you manage to write a poem that doesn't fit into a standard "bad poem" category, it might earn you extra points.
300 points for Gold, 100 points for Silver. I won't necessarily comment on every entry, just the ones that really make me cringe.
Of course, the challenge here is to make the poem REALLY bad. Can you strive for badness without irony? How do you innovate unoriginality? It's a paradox! So I expect the best poets to enter...and the idiot savants too.
Have fun! Don't take it personally!
Here's some inspiration.
I've noticed that much of the bad poetry I read groups into the following categories:
* sappy, sentimental love poems
* gothic/pseudo-Victorian poems about vampires,
haunted castles, etc.
* poems that rehash the most vapid, sentimental
aspects of "Christianity" or "patriotism"
* cutsie-wootsie poems about babies, flowers,
springtime, etc. in which the poem is less lovely
than the thing being considered.
* "erotic" poetry that is actually just pornographic
Your poem does not have to fit into one of these categories, I just listed them to get you started. In fact, if you manage to write a poem that doesn't fit into a standard "bad poem" category, it might earn you extra points.
300 points for Gold, 100 points for Silver. I won't necessarily comment on every entry, just the ones that really make me cringe.
Of course, the challenge here is to make the poem REALLY bad. Can you strive for badness without irony? How do you innovate unoriginality? It's a paradox! So I expect the best poets to enter...and the idiot savants too.
Have fun! Don't take it personally!
Contest is Over
- Contest was judged on June 20, 2007
- Rewards: Gold: 300, Silver: 100
- Final notes: Pathetic.
Contest Winners
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by pozo 63 lines, 4 comments, on May 26 7:16 AM 2007. In Shit poetry, Adult, Dark, Hope, Spiritual, Patriotic, Olden days
Silver trophy winner
• Commented on by judge. [remove] -
• Commented on by judge. Prewrite [remove]
- Error: Unable to find finalist item 3004616, it seems to have been deleted :( [remove]
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by kaida-nariko 23 lines, 5 comments, on May 15 4:26 PM 2007. In Erotica, Life, Adult, Romance, Dedication• Commented on by judge. Prewrite [remove]
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'Tis but no blur, thus a reality / Lest we find a cruel existance- / This is but a whim, a ghastly stench.. / Oh! how dothe it find my heart. / It hath scathed and dulled my senses / Aye! I hath a lust soby Quest for Thought 7 lines, 2 comments, on May 26 2:05 PM 2007. In Weird• Commented on by judge. [remove]
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The moonlight
Wakes my every dream at night• Commented on by judge. Prewrite [remove] -
A song about still being in love with your dickhead ex-boyfreind.Or being in love with your new one too soon.by Lady Nightshade 46 lines, 1 comment, on Dec 12 7:35 AM 2006. In Lyrics• Commented on by judge. Prewrite [remove]
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• Commented on by judge. [remove]
- Error: Unable to find finalist item 3008160, it seems to have been deleted :( [remove]
Gold trophy winner
Bronze trophy winner
Entries [19]
1 - 19 of 19
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Revere in kindnessPick apart your bloodA gift to godFine SoothingMovingChoosing Your weaponClouds remainDraby Angel w o Wings 36 lines, 62 comments, on Apr 25 12:57 AM 2006. In Dark• Commented on by judge. Prewrite
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by Porcelain Princess 45 lines, 25 comments, on Apr 10 7:54 PM 2007• Commented on by judge. Prewrite
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• Viewed by judge. Prewrite
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She once was a princess
long blonde hair and a perfect nose• Viewed by judge. Prewrite -
I set out to write you the best darn love poem, and this is what I came up with, becuase I love you SOOOOOOO much and because our love is better than everyone elses, and I think that flowers are almost as beautiful as you!by BlueNote27 103 lines, 2 comments, on Jun 5 10:00 AM 2007. In Humor, Bad poetry, emo, patriotism, love• Viewed by judge.
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You trust them with your secrets
You think they'll never hurt you• Viewed by judge. Prewrite -
Here's a story about a boy
he wasn't real, he was just a toyby Ashaq 57 lines, 10 comments, on May 27 11:50 AM 2006. In Adult humor• Viewed by judge. Prewrite
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Comments
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ALL of mine are jacked up - I wouldn't know which one to enter.
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Mistake
Hey, I told someone who entered that they had entered too much and should leave room for others. I did that because, well, because I'm an idiot. I didn't realize that the submissions all show up as anonymous, and that "System" isn't someone's username! Doh! So, whoever I messaged that to, I'm sorry, your entry was much appreciated. -
Thanks for the silver... uh I think
Hopefully not all my poetry is that bad lol
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