Hi contest fans!
I need your help!
I started to write a story but could not finish it.
All I need from you is the last line.
The most imaginative and meaningful of you will win the gold and 300 points.
No rules apart from?
This is not a humour contest.
I want a line that a real novelist would think up.
To make you think and wonder perhaps.
Something of the genius gender OK?
So read the story below and then think up your line and post it.
I will be very interested to see what you can come up with.
The Doctor invited the man to sit.
He noticed much to his distaste, that this patient stank of old sweat,
And looked as though he had not washed for days.
On closer observation he made up his mind to get this over with as quickly as possible, and examine him.
He noticed the blood stains, clotted around the patient’s forehead.
And asked the patient his name?
But the man did not speak.
He just looked back with big sad lost eyes, almost tearful.
The man adorned a long shaggy beard, and his hair was unkempt and bedraggled.
The doctor now aware of the gross poverty that was sat before him, asked the patient to remove his ragged clothes?
The patient stood and undressed himself until he was naked.
On seeing the sight which was now bared before him, the Doctor was silent in fear and disbelief for a moment.
For the mans back plainly visible from where he was now standing he observed, had deep lesions!
Welts of such ferocity to strike into the bone, and bare them so cruel, for his eyes to now see, yet not to believe?
The doctor felt the bile rise within his gut and excused himself for a moment as he rushed to vomit in the examination room sink.
On his return, the man still naked had sat down again and now turned his head, seemingly in no pain or distress at all.
Still not a word came from the mans lips, as the doctor telephoned through to the reception area, to ring the emergency services and acquire an ambulance as soon as possible.
Replacing the receiver the doctor spoke saying
“The Ambulance is on its way, I will just give you an injection for the pain you must be suffering. And a sedative to calm you.”
The man opened his mouth to speak, but instead stood up again, revealing his torso to the doctor’s gaze.
A wound in his side open and bleeding, was clearly visible. And the blood which ran copiously from it, streamed down the mans right leg forming a dark pool upon the white tiled floor.
Clearly even more distressed now and trying not to show it, the Doctor raced to the mans aid and tried to stem the flow of blood with a wad of lint.
He could not lay the man down to rest because of the wounds upon his back, and neither could he lay him on his front because of the wound in his torso..
So he told him to sit.
The patient wide eyed and seemingly oblivious to his surroundings or his dilemma, did as he was asked?
The Doctor compressed the wadding to stem the flow of blood and it was then, that he noticed the holes, within the man’s hands and feet.
And in shock! He blurted out
“JESUS! What the hell happened to you?”
The patient looked long and hard within the Doctors eyes and said?
Contest is Over
- Contest was judged on June 2, 2007
- Rewards: Gold: 300, Silver: 100, Bronze: 50, Honorable mention: 3 people
- Final notes: Thankyou all so much for your wonderful descriptive writings, from you poetic,hearts in their beliefs. And conceptions.
I had to think long and hard at who the winners should be, but in the end I wanted something that might shock and you would not expect.
It had to be something that made you think.To give the story real meaning and body.
Thankyou for the wonderful inspiration you all have collectively given to me to actually think up a last line for this tale.
I have posted the finished story on my site and would be glad to see what you think of the ending.
http://allpoetry.com/poem/show/3031390
Thank you all again!
Contest Winners
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" You wondered all your life if I loved you, these wounds are for you my son."• Viewed by judge. [remove]
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- Error: Unable to find finalist item 2983596, it seems to have been deleted :( [remove]
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My brother, you know my name, my torture has not been in vain.• Viewed by judge. [remove]
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Well, the short answer is; "I gave my body over to the ravishes of sin's delight, and sin gave to me it's best"• Viewed by judge. [remove]
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“You man of little faith. These are the result of yours and the world's sin. Now get up and go into the city, and you will be told what you must do."by writer-of -poems 1 lines, 2 comments, on May 28 12:30 PM 2007• Viewed by judge. [remove]
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"The ark, again. For the seventh time...You must build it." / But then a fire raged through the man's pupils, aflame went his soul. He seized the doctors arms and they began to wrestle, blood cascading over the doctor'by Looking 6 lines, 1 comment, on May 28 1:51 PM 2007• Viewed by judge. [remove]
- Error: Unable to find finalist item 3014744, it seems to have been deleted :( [remove]
- Error: Unable to find finalist item 2970279, it seems to have been deleted :( [remove]
Gold trophy winner
Silver trophy winner
Bronze trophy winner
Honorable mention
Entries [20]
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The beginning and the end.by Poet4theSpirit 0 lines, 1 comment, on May 15 10:20 PM 2007• Viewed by judge.
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"My Son, I hung around the Cross a bit too long, Bless You"• Viewed by judge.
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[ "It is true, you are him, the one who cannot be controled, the one with choice", touching the doct"It is true, you are him, the one who cannot be controled, the one with choice", touching the doctors face with his bloody palm / "You passed....... You win" the man screamed into the skyby Looking 1 lines, on May 28 1:59 PM 2007• Viewed by judge.
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"You are him" / "This is him," he screamed into the sky.by Looking 1 lines, on May 28 2:04 PM 2007• Viewed by judge.
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Comments
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thank you kindly for the HM, my best to all
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congrats all it seems comments to each entry are a non event
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thanks keith. good luck with your story
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