I need to laugh, yes I said NEED to laugh. It has been a very long time since I have anything worth laughing about in my life and I am having humor withdrawals.
So this is what I want... I am going to give you a phrase and I want you to complete it in a humorous poem. You must start your poem out with this phrase but can take any direction from there as long as it makes me laugh. Only those that make me laugh out loud will have the chance to move forward into the finalist positions. I will be awarding points for gold, silver, bronze and honorable mentions so put on those laugh caps and see what you can do to bring me out of this melancholy mood.
Rules:
No erotica
No chat lingo or sticky caps
No overuse of foul language ( I am not a fan of it...hint, hint)
you must use this phrase to open your poem's first line:
If ever there was _________
Note: I will read and comment on every entry, however I may not comment on entries until contest closes and I certainly won't move any entry into the finalist positions until I have begun my final judging ( I think it discourages those yet to enter). I am judging blindly and I will judge fairly. If you make me laugh harder then any other then you will win my contest regardless of who you are.
Best of luck in the contest and have fun everyone.
Gold - 300 pts and trophy
Silver - 200 pts and trophy
Bronze - 100 pts and trophy
HM's - 30 pts and trophy ( there will be at least 2 Hm's given out )
*hug*
Suzi
Update : I have been unable to make this contest a "blind" contest and have been informed by a moderator that it is a glitch in the system right now. I apologize for any inconvenience this might cause any of you, but I assure you that it will not change the fact that this contest will be judged fairly.... give me the greatest laugh and you win!
Contest is Over
- Contest was judged on January 19, 2007
- Rewards: Gold: 300, Silver: 200, Bronze: 100, Honorable mention: 2 people
- Final notes: My apologies to you all for the short comments and the length of time to judge. I have been stricken with a severe migraine for days now as well as swollen fingers from arthritis. I wish to thank you all for your patience and for the time you took to read and follow the rules. Thank you all for entering as you put smiles upon my face!
God Bless,
Suzi
Contest Winners
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If there ever was just one day
when things would just go smooth• Commented on by judge. [remove] -
If ever there was a clean man
Who picked up after himself• Commented on by judge. [remove] - Error: Unable to find finalist item 2476847, it seems to have been deleted :( [remove]
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If ever there was AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOOOOOO OH GOD NOOOOOO, PLEASE, I HAVE A WIFE, A CAT, A THREE...OTHER CATS.• Commented on by judge. [remove]
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As soon as it was quiet, I began to read that verse
but then, when only half way through, I began to think the worst.• Commented on by judge. [remove] - Error: Unable to find finalist item 2476461, it seems to have been deleted :( [remove]
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If ever there was a time, that I felt full of shame
It was when I got a visit from this gentleman and his dame• Commented on by judge. [remove] - Error: Unable to find finalist item 2478449, it seems to have been deleted :( [remove]
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If ever there was finer clearer joy,
Than simply being fur-clad pampered me,by EvilKate 14 lines, 1 comment, on Jan 15 10:17 AM 2007. In Humour; Nature; Animal; Pets• Commented on by judge. [remove]
Gold trophy winner
Silver trophy winner
Honorable mention
Entries [18]
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If ever there was a blue monkey
more lifely and spunky,• Commented on by judge. -
I had my brother laughing with tears in his eyes -pentibabeby PentiBabe 24 lines, 4 comments, on Jan 4 2:17 AM 2007• Commented on by judge.
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Making sure he didn't become
a mathematician.by dillpickle62 64 lines, 5 comments, on Jan 5 10:23 PM 2007• Commented on by judge. -
Dell the Dolphin
pirouettes and leaps
across the stage• Commented on by judge. -
Oh my...Its alice in wonderland...with me n a fwoggy toad.• Commented on by judge.
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• Commented on by judge.
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if there ever was a flash light
i would go down there• Commented on by judge.
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Comments
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Will work on this one, not sure though, me and humor, hmmmmm, sounds hard. LOL. will book mark it, Have fun with it.anyways.
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shmexy kitty
if ever there was a time to masterbate...
it would be now, that kitty looks pretty hot if you know what i mean... -
Suzi, I'm glad you enjoyed your contest and I hope you are feeling better (soon)!
Congrats to the winners!
Annie 
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well done and congrats all winners and I hope we all cheered you
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thanks so much for silver! I'm so happy it placed! Congrats to everyone!
PoeticThunder*
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