Admit it, it's all about you! Now's your chance to express it. Crack open your angst filled teen diaries and "I hate you mommy" memories and tell me about you; Your hopes, your dreams, your pain, what makes you an interesting person...In other words, lie!
Poetry or prose of no more than 24 lines...yes I know, you could write all day about your favorite subject but quite frankly, what you write is about you...and well, in my little cubbyhole it is all about me, so I'll get bored fast!
Truth is a wonderful (though elusive) trait in humans, but it isn't exciting...I'd prefer to hear white lies, still if "truth" is all you can muster...well, I'll feign an interest.
If you don't want to write about you, write about the person you love second best...no wait...we only love ourselves...just write about you.
One entry per self-absorbed AP member.
500 points to the most self-centered individual
101 to the second most egocentric author.
100 to the poor sap who comes in third.
This contest is subject to closing at any time after I get three entries.
And this is meant as humor, so don't get your feathers ruffled...no wait, do get them ruffled...it could make for fun reading!
Poetry or prose of no more than 24 lines...yes I know, you could write all day about your favorite subject but quite frankly, what you write is about you...and well, in my little cubbyhole it is all about me, so I'll get bored fast!
Truth is a wonderful (though elusive) trait in humans, but it isn't exciting...I'd prefer to hear white lies, still if "truth" is all you can muster...well, I'll feign an interest.
If you don't want to write about you, write about the person you love second best...no wait...we only love ourselves...just write about you.
One entry per self-absorbed AP member.
500 points to the most self-centered individual
101 to the second most egocentric author.
100 to the poor sap who comes in third.
This contest is subject to closing at any time after I get three entries.
And this is meant as humor, so don't get your feathers ruffled...no wait, do get them ruffled...it could make for fun reading!
Contest is Over
- Contest was judged on August 17, 2005
- Rewards: Gold: 500
- Final notes: This contest was hard...not for the usual reason, a plethora of good entries (though there were) but, because the entries were about each of you...and I conly care about me! ;P
The first two winners were newbies to the world of Yem, the third was the venerable MargaretG.
Most of my contests are judged with some intangible in mind...thus superbly written poems (like Margaret's) often lose to poems that reach that undefinable quality. In this one, I was looking for two things (besides creativity): An ability to tell a tall tale but make it seem natural, and a tale so far out, it made me fall over in my chair. The former I found, the latter sadly is a Yemish Holy Grail.
Thanks everyone, and please come again.
Entries [19]
1 - 19 of 19
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don't know what to think of this one yetby ShatteredSilverStar 11 lines, 5 comments, on Aug 11 10:35 AM 2005. In Personal• Commented on by judge.
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I can hear you in a whisper,
but can you hear me screaming?• Commented on by judge. -
Step aside,
can't you see I'm walking the line.• Commented on by judge. -
Don't ask me.... ask Yem• Commented on by judge.
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i've got a hot bod, and a nineteen-inch rod,
and i'm loaded with fabulous riches.by picklesheep 12 lines, 11 comments, on Aug 11 2:36 PM 2005. In Humor• Commented on by judge. -
My wife’s convinced I’m brilliant (She’s extremely erudite.)
Her opinions are intelligent (we hardly ever fight!).• Commented on by judge. -
i eat minestrone because i have poetry in me
and it squeals when i don't feed it properly• Commented on by judge. -
come and adore me like I do ;)• Commented on by judge.
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To write a poem which is about
Oneself, is hard, there is no doubt• Commented on by judge. -
by g r e y i s m 22 lines, 11 comments, on Aug 12 5:04 PM 2005. In Humor• Commented on by judge.
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When I was
fourteen,• Commented on by judge. -
Me name is Joan, though I waz christened Beatrice by me Dad
"I'll call her Joan!" me Mum insisted "That name she won't be had!"• Commented on by judge. -
• Commented on by judge.
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• Commented on by judge.
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Even if my job sucks,
I like monster trucks• Commented on by judge. -
I am the supreme of the supreme tacos
and there shall not be another after me.• Commented on by judge. -
Being the youngest
I guess you'd call me the brat• Commented on by judge. -
• Commented on by judge.
Gold trophy winner
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Comments
1 - 22 of 22
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Aha! This sounds like fun, Yem'n'Ima, the wheels are turning!
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YAY. Now my brain is happy
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If I entered that I'm a beauty queen and mother of the powerpuff girls, would I stand a chance
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Leander- if it were my contest and you were to enter that you're a beauty queen and teh mother of powerpuff girls, you would get first second and third place!!
Anyways, Ill think about entering this one, not sure yet.
Malzy -
It depends...is that all you are going to say? It's a bit short, lol. I don't even know how I'm going to judge this thing, so yes, you'd stand a chance.
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Oh if I could I would! Which means of course, this will close before I do since Murphy is usually in charge of these things, and he is always much more efficient than I am. Self-centered:
I'm just your average country song,
mixed up with some blues,
my dog done died when I was two,
and now I have no shoes....
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"i cut myself today,
it felt mmm mmm good
the blood red bleeds down my arm,
a slice
a gash
more than a papercut,
almost deadly,
how i long to meet my master
satan"
Now even that's better written than teen angst. The spelling isn't atrocious.
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Oh wow, was I ever a teen angst junkie?? RIGHT NOW WOULD BE A GOOD TIME TO GIVE ME SOME PUDDING BEFORE I RUIN THIS PAGE WITH MY TEARS FOR PAUL WHO...yeah.
There I go again...but I won't cry anymore.
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Very cool contest. I actually enjoyed reading this contest page as much as some of the poetry I've read lately LOL. Very cute. I'll see if I can come up with something.
~Lyrical
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If you write it I'll keep it open for you. And I'll toss in 200 points as an entry incentive.
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Ah who am I to pass up such subtle incentive... GRIN.. deal I'll write it..
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Cool uncle.. infact a new sort of contest from ur side.. I know ur expecting humour in here.. in that case.. lemme see.. if i can write White lies or Purple Truthz..
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You actually only need the one entry to close.
Who's counting?
I like writing about myself. -
Oh my goodness.
Yemster.
I'm so perfect and I have lived a perfect life. I have perfect children. An axe murderer. I have a perfect husband. Now six feet under. I have a perfect mother. Who flies a broom.
EVERYTHING IS JUSSSST "PERFECT."@#&&@##@#!Hahahahaha
My new name should be
Fruit of the Loom. -
Nah.. can't describe myself.. not a very good idea
Some wonderfully-crazy-adorably-mentally-abnormal- enteries
Good luck with your contest.
Hugs,
Eeyores Buddy
Edited on Aug 16, 10:24 because ''. -
Oh Uncle Yem, I will try to write something but as of lately, my muse is ignoring my calls. She turned off her answering machine it seems too. But I'll try very hard!
Love
Jess -
I had a reely good one written so i thought then my computer got mad and froze up... grrr... u may never know the truth of OP now... I'll try my best
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this is an awesome contest idea Uncle Yem (and Ima...)... I don't think I can write about myself but good luck!!!
Hugs,
Beth -
Congratulations to the winners..this was fun!!
Sam
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Dear Yem, thank you very much for the bronze trophy. You say it is one among many, but each one from you has a special place. Thanks for points too!
Congratulations to the other participants and winners.
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today is my birthday and the shiny gold was a very nice birthday present. Us Leos definatly are good at being self-centered and concieted arent we?
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Where is my piece of cake?
Edited on Aug 17, 3:25 p.m. because ''.
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