The ten commandments - by stewie griffin [well myself, on his behalf, he cannot write yet].
1. Thou shalt kill your mother at all costs.
2. Thou shalt worship only Stewie. If you do any of the following another baby: hug, kiss, adore or obey, the ultimate one (Stewie) is in authority to KICK YOUR ASS.
3. Thou shalt abuse the family pet and mock it whenever possible. If there is no pet, thou shalt treat the family member most like an animal in the same manner.
4. Thou shalt recite 'victory shall be stewies' at least 3 times a day without fail, or prices will be paid!
5. Thou shalt set at least 2 weeks per year dedicating loyalty to the mighty stewie's plan for world domination! If no money, toys, games or compliments are sent the SSS (Stewie's Secret Society) will be whippin' yo ass.
6. Thou shalt not insult Stewie or use his name in vain. No 'Stewie-poo' or 'Oh for Stewie's sake!' this is punishable by DEATH! You shall all DIE!
7. Thou shalt not show love to your mother or father. Fake love is accepted, if it is obvious that you intend to terminate them in the end.
8. Thou shalt read the book of Stewie at least once a day, at least a page! 3776-4342-342487 (item code on Amazon! BUY!) called Stewie's Plans For World Domination, Destruction and Demolition.
9. Thou shalt not sing songs for children. This angers the Stewie the superior. Instead, 'I Like Big Butts' is a kind suggestion.
10. Thou shalt watch Stewie being an evil infant at least once a week. Failing to do so involves your eyes getting gouged out!
Signed by Stewie - VICTORY SHALL BE MINE!
You know you're obsessed with family guy when...
1. You swore you caught your dog drinking something a little stronger than the water you left out last night.
2. You always start your sentence with 'yeah' in a drawn out tone. 'yeaaah'.
3. You've prepared yourself for a trip to Rhode Island.
4. ... And mapped out the whole area, including pub, school, the griffin/swanson/quagmire/cleveland houses.
5. You have Betty White 'bookmarked' on amazon just incase they release some new Peterotica.
6.
---updating---
Adding your comment:
Very, very funny. I love Family Guy.
