How Line Breaks Affect Perception and Emotion

 

 

 

Consider this stanza:

 

 

While those stumbling down the lowly roads
have but up to see, and when they fall,
and they inevitably will, will survive,
having seen the despair, having lived the horror,
and having little of the answer.

 

 

Now this layout imparts the poem's meter and rhythm,

but it is a big block of words that may scare away those looking for a light read.

 

The challenge is to lighten it up

without changing the meaning, perceptions, and emotions;

and if they are changed differently by different  variations,

then you must choose which to use...

 

 Here is one solution:

 

 

While those stumbling down the lowly roads
have but up to see,

and when they fall,
and they inevitably will, will survive,
having seen the despair, having lived the horror,

and having little of the answer.

 

 

Where we break up the second line, giving it a lighter feel.

This solution does little to the overall perception and emotion of the stanza.

 

What if we break up another line instead:

 

 

While those stumbling down the lowly roads
have but up to see, and when they fall,
and they inevitably will,

will survive,
having seen the despair, having lived the horror,
and having little of the answer.

 

 

This variation now places a strong emphasis on 'survive',

and alters the perception and emotion of the piece.

 

If we try another variation:

 

 

While those stumbling down the lowly roads
have but up to see, and when they fall,
and they inevitably will, will survive,
having seen the despair,

having lived the horror,
and having little of the answer. 

 

 

Now the reader is thrust into the despair and horror,

each elevated, each having their own lines.

This makes the piece heavier emotionally,

which may not be what you want if your audience is light.

 

If we really lighten it up, and try breaking up more lines,

 

 

While those stumbling

down the lowly roads
have but up to see,

and when they fall,
and they inevitably will,

will survive,
having seen the despair,

having lived the horror,
and having little of the answer. 

 

 

Although cute,

we end up with a hard to read piece, having too many line breaks,

meaning too many different concepts being emphasized,

each having their own lines,

and they all blur together in the end, with little meaning imparted-

in other words, the reader will 'read' it, but little will sink in.

 

 

Here is another variation to consider:

 

 

While those

stumbling down the lowly roads
have but up to see,

and when they fall,
and they inevitably will,

will survive,
having seen the despair, having lived the horror,
and having little of the answer. 

 

 

This version offers no improvements,

and the first two lines may obscure the rhythm,

making it read like prose in the beginning.

When the reader reacquires the rhythm later

confusion will set in as to how to read the piece,

and you will lose your light reader.

 

 

 

Conclusion: make judicious use of line breaks.

 

You may do it for beautification, clarification, or emphasis;

but remember- too much of anything and the piece may become a blur;

and being a blur is only useful when you are imparting beautiful verbiage

and hiding it's shallow contents!

 

So, select smartly that which you wish to beautify or emphasize

through experimenting and testing variations.

 

 

 

 

If you go back to the first version above,

punctuation comes into play, as with the comma after 'survive',

but that is another column...!