Nothing Special... Nothing Special At All...

So I just needed a place to put down a few feelings I have been having that I cannot find a way to work into a poem. So I figured here could be one of the best places to do that.

For a while now, I have been feeling rather numb. My relationships were shitty and I could barely hold a stable one. Tony was just a dumbass who knew nothing. Though it was my fault that I inflated his ego. Sorry to all. But he was my longest relationship, standing at thirteen months. I did everything that could be done within a relationship. And it was went down the tubes.

Then there was Carmine. Now... I thought things might go different. He was a grade older than me and we had a lot in common. He shared my love for strawberries and my obsession for penguins. He majored in English and I thought he was perfect. But, of course, as life begins, life ends. As do relationships. Within the sixth month of our relationship, he called it quits. Then again, it didn't really help that he was in Canada and me, in Mass.

After a month or two, I found myself falling again. My heart wretching into a trillion pieces from the last two losses. This one was another across the country. Georgia. Another online relationship. Another heartbreak waiting to happen. But... this time, I had broken it off. Though, not completely. While with him, I was asked out by a guy my age. Younger, actually. Whereas all the others have been older.

I love him. As I found out myself just a few days ago. He's an angel and I wouldn't trade anything in the world for him. I told him about my dilemma. He understood. I needed to make sure. Just a few days ago, I didn't know what to feel and now, I feel amazing. Like my life has turned around in a complete 360*. I just hope it's not like any of the others. Where I'm with him and then just lose him randomly. My heart has been through enough.

If you read this, thank you for reading it. Though I do believe you just wasted ten minutes of your life that you cannot get back.

<3 Lullaby.