If someone asks me to analyse each word of a poem, I’m tempted to dig quite deep inside of the emotions that could
If someone asks me to analyse each word of a poem, I’m tempted to dig quite deep inside of the emotions that could possibly be attached on them. Now, with English not being my maternal language, I’m totally aware of the fact that I can easily miss the essence of what was meant - cause it’s quite common that it is hidden between the lines when metaphors are used.
However, I tried my best to complete this assignment, and once again, I’ve chosen the same poem I was inspired about to write ‘Disguised as corpses’ for mission 14.
I have to admit that I had to read this poem a few times, before I understood what you were all saying in it (at least, I think that I understood it, cause for the same amount of money I got a complete wrong picture) but, here it is:
Fist stanza:
Boy, I want to manufacture some artificial blood.
I’m not in the mood for the conventional, stuff.
Lets sprint across the strawberry patch,
and let let the stains do the bleeding for a change.
Roll around, roll around.
It came quite quickly to me, that you were wandering somewhere inside of your wishes or dreams when you wrote this poem. With the first two lines, I think you were stating that you want to get out of this famous box - the norm that is set by society. Where the ‘artificial blood’ you’re talking about, is what you create when you pierce through the maze of the conventional things.
In third and fourth line, you gave me the impression you dug a little bit further, showing that ‘the stains’ are in fact people who hurt other people with their labelling and judging, where you used these ‘strawberry patches’ to cover up the wounds and reflect their prejudices right back at them.
The last line gave me, strangely enough, a vision of you in your bed, dreaming about all these things...
A little side note on this stanza: in fourth line you have two times the word ‘let’ after each other I’m not sure whether this is an error or not. Yet somehow I felt like it’s right, but only that you forgot to put three points (... -> don’t know the name in English) after the first one. As if you were dreaming away literally in your words.
and let... let the stains do the bleeding for a change.
Second stanza:
I crave raw coockie dough.
Momma’ knows how to feed ‘er boy well.
Just give him the good stuff, good stuff.
Lets live in a world of sweeteners, and lets roll over
and die together.
Lets do it now.
Lets save us some time, and
roll around. Roll around.
First three lines of this stanza gave me the impression you want to go back to the ‘beginning’ of your life (as you compare it with Cookie dough, the beginning for a Cookie) to grow up again with the same education your parents (Momma) gave you, but then without the terrifying things our society of today consists off (Terrorism, corruption, labelling...)
The last part gave me the feeling you were showing once again, this all belongs to the utopia of our dreams (world of sweeteners) where you ‘roll over’ again from one side of your bed to the other knowing that you’ll wake up somehow and die together with your dreams.
Third stanza:
If only there were twenty five hours in the day,
we’d surely need another minute.
I don’t have enough coinage to play the crane game, baby,
but you can bet that I’m still pullin’ in the prize.
I’ve had my eye on this piece for some time, now.
All I gotta’ do is roll around, roll around.
First two lines are very powerful and in fact, they sound like they are coming from a genius. They really spoke to my imagination, as you wish that the days were an hour longer to fulfill your dreams, but then again, the extra hour wouldn’t be long enough to do so. The next three lines show that you are determined to somehow reach these ideals of you (still pullin’ in the prize) but you don’t really know exactly how (I don’t have enough coinage...)
Last line is again where you reflect yourself in your bed, where you roll over again to the other side...
Last stanza:
I need myself some Saran wrap
to prevent our dreams from spoiling.
I want to try my hand at Chinese checkers,
and I want to forfeit a Yahtzee on the edge of a cliff-
the Grand Canyon, where all we gotta’ do
is roll around. Roll around.
Now, you had me pondering on the word ‘Saran’. I really had no clue what it meant. Unfortunately, it didn’t capture a place in my English to Dutch dictionary so I hoovered the on-line dictionaries on the net, where I found quite fast that it is explained as ‘any of various thermoplastic resins used to make things.’
Then I discovered a strong message in it as I attached the second line with it:
No matter what dreams you cherish, only hold on to them cause you never know that one day, you’ll be able to see them fulfilled.
The next three lines is where you state that, in order to fulfill our dreams, you might have to take some risks. (the edge of the Grand Canyon) where you close the poem once again, with an image of you rolling over in your bed...
A I said before, It’s possible that I went way to far to analyse this, but then again, that’s what I got out of it...
...
Add a comment
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
-
This is just damn brilliant! I love it! I was LMAO to be honest and then went back to read it again. This is one of the best explanatory pieces I've ever read, to be honest. I must say to pick apart metaphors has always been my fascination, so in my eyes, this was just a wonderful adventure for me to delve into. thanks for making my night 
Blessings and Hugs, Gypsy
-
ooohooo so I'm going to put all the time ellipsis instead of (...) now (ellipsis) --> see
Thank you for the comment mommy I'm within the last two for this APTP thing it's nail-biting time 
huig
-
I want to hug my cyber-son! This is just terrific!
You're indeed a smart guy
Behind the 
you use on your comments, you hide a very vigilant mind.
I went to look for the right term of ... it's called ellipsis Now we know
Kusjes en nog kusjes,
Mom -
Well...I am surprised...and yet, I am NOT surprised, Leander. This is one of the best and indepth comments that I have seen on AP. You really are moving, my friend! You did a wonderful job and I am so proud of you, of the way you've suddenly grown-up, development in your poetic skills and abilities...and here you are disecting a poem, giving us more than just a poem, but a look behind the curtains, behind the scenes. Wonderfully done - not only on an intellectual level, but also emotionally and creatively.
Damn, you are GOOD and this APTP-thing is bringing out the BESt in you!!
~ Nicolette
-
Hey you! great poem flows well! danged yor goodd ..sense of humur is grate keep op the good wurk..Linda..(a little sense of humur there) ..
-
I am stinking proud of you too Leander... I totally agree with Story of Redemption. You are amazing. But that's nothing new... I tell you over and over again.... Oh, I am SO PROUD of my (Dutch speaking) FRIEND. You did a wonderful job. Very well done.
Anna
-
Well, in my eyes, youre a winner. But all that aside, I think that if you have more confidence in yourself, youll go far, further than you have already! good job and good luck
Mal -
WOW.....You are good baby!!! That poem made absolutly no sense to me what so ever. I can't beleive you picked it apart so well...now it makes perfect sense! Your IQ must be off the charts! Shannon
-
-
Leander!!!
Ugh, man I'm so stinkin' proud of you. I find this all just horribly funny. Week after week you feel as though you will do poorly, and yet time after time you just ace the challenge. Good golly, you did well.
This poem had several ways in which you could interpret it, but I feel as though you did the absolute best with it. There were some instances where your analysis wasn't totally correct, yet your proof and reasoning was overwhelmingly accurate... and truly made the poem even better in my mind!
So, I am very much so pleased with this Leander. Very much so.
Justin
Adding your comment:
1 - 10 of 10
