Filthy Lies and Other Well Documented Facts June 22 2009

This is a letter I recently posted to my friend Jerry in California.  
"Hey Jerry, How are you doing? Sorry to hear about the ill informed and incredibly bigoted vote. As I understand it this will not nullify your marriage but it is an outrage none-the-less. I have decided to run a third party write -in campaign for Governor of New York and one of the most contoversial planks in my  platform is a call for an immediate moratorium on heterosexual marriage. Here are some alarming facts turned up by my staff.

-- At this writing the divorce rate for hetrosexual marriages is over 52% and climbing.

-- By far the largest number of domestic violence incidents police are called to involve heterosexual couples.

--The children of heterosexual marriages are the overwhelmingly highest catagory of suicides, drug abusers and violent criminals

--Most child abusers are heterosexual parents

-- Very few gang members,despotic dictators' or serial killers are found to be anything but the product of Heterosexual marriage.--



                          HELP US Stop the MADNESS! 

                           SUPPORT THE VENOMOUS

                                TOAD RESISTANCE


                 GOVERERNMENT:   It Aint That Pretty At All


I'm Hal Shannon and I want to be the next Governor of New York State.

   With this symbolic attack on Fort Sumpter I begin my quest to return control of the of the Government of New York to the peopleof the State of New York. My policies are radical, ahead of thier time, and, somemight say, completely insane.But that doesn't mean they aren't good ideas.

   For those of you who are saying to youselves, "Why should I care? I don't live in New York and wouldn't if you paid me a million dollars." I can only say that a large number of our Presidents have  been Governors first. I stand completely behind President Obama and hope to see him complete two terms as our president. That happens to be just about how long it will take me to straighten out New York.

   Here are a few more of my wide ranging and innovative Ideas.

#1. Legalise Prostitution.- This is a no-brainer and good for everybody concerned,customers, prostitutes ,the health car system,the courts and the tax payer. Not to mention an incredible boost to tourism.

#2.Expel New York City and rename the rest of the state New Ampsterdam. It sounds better,It's more historically accurate and it would advertise the fact that a large number of people live, work, and pay taxes,north of the island of Manhatten.

#3. Restore all proceeds of the NYS lottery to the use for which it was originally promised: EDUCATION! This criminal diversion of funds has gone on long enough.

   I have many more Ideas which I will be bringing to you in the coming months. Watch this space for new developments. I am eager to here your opinions, ideas and suggestions. Please contact the Venomous Toad Resistance Party at venomoustoad23@yahoo.com