Humorously written, but in the interest of peace between the sexes. I thought this would be helpful to the guyys who have forgotten and for the women who haven't.
Buddy
Buddy
A refresher on 9 words women use
(1) FINE: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
(2) FIVE MINUTES: If she is getting dressed, this means a half hour. Five minutes is only 5 minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
(3) NOTHING: This is the calm before the storm. This means something and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end with fine.
(4) GO AHEAD: This is a dare, not permission. DON’T DO IT!
(5) LOUD SIGH: Not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is standing here, arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)
(6) THAT’S OKAY: This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. It means she wants to think long and hard before deciding when and how you will pay for your mistake.
(7) THANKS: A woman is thanking you, do not question or faint. Just say you are welcome. (However if she say “Thanks a lot”- that is pure sarcasm and she is NOT thanking you at all. DO NOT say ‘you’re welcome’, that will bring 'whatever').
(8) WHATEVER: Is a woman’s way of saying, ‘the heck with you!’
(9) DON’T WORRY ABOUT IT I GOT IT: Another dangerous statement meaning, this is something that a women has told a man to do several times, but is now doing herself. Later the man will ask ‘What’s wrong?’ For the woman’s response refer to #3.
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"Go Ahead"
"Fine" - Joke about us all you like! "Whatever" Buddy. "Thanks" for reminding all of us ("loud sigh") what it is that "women haven't forgotten". "That's OKAY" - I'm not offended, there's no need to explain further... "don't worry about it I got it" - and in "five minutes", you'll get it, too. What's that, you ask? "Nothing" - never mind, I'm just kidding... Really. Thanks for sharing your (male) humor, and keep it flowing(!!)
Peace,
Cyn
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At this point the smart man says, "Yes dear"
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LOL, you're too funny!! I'm really amazed you still have a sense of humor in your condition!!
Peace,
Cyn
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Training, I was raised using humor to cover all kinds of pain.
Peace, indeed peace of all kinds is the desirable state of life.
Thanks again for your caring words.
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Lol it's funny how that is so true
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Yes, thanks... lol
I wonder what happened to the format, to make it soo long.
Your digging in the archives... careful, it gets dark in there. Then sometimes it get soo dark...
I delete them all. I have done it twice in my three years here.
Thanks for coming by
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Fine...nothing...whatever...don't worry about it, i got it...those are usually followed by heavy footstomps as she walks away.. dont' forget that part
hehe
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Ok, you made me pull out the men's trump card... Yes dear.
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woot! woot! yesssssssssss.. you're a keeper
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hahahahahhahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhaahhahaha
Very Nice!
*high five* -
This was GREAT!!!
You are just toooooooo funny (and too wise at the same time!)
I have to say I agree with everything you said here.
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That's funny! I guess I never stopped to think about it, but this is so true!
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LOL true in some cases. Not mine, thank God.
Guess that is why I find it funny.
Thanks for stopping to read and comment.
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Hmm. This column makes me wonder what kind of woman I am. I never say any of these things. Well, I say that's okay, but when I say that's okay, I really mean that's okay. And, when I tell someone thanks a lot, I mean it from the bottom of my soul. I think I spent way too much time around men in my younger years. I wasn't exactly a tomboy, but I was a daddy's girl and one of my role models growing up was my cousin, a guy, who worked in a level 4 lab for disease control. Maybe that's why I always felt like one of the guys in school. Ha, I was also thinking this column reminds me of some trouble one of my guy subscribers had a couple months ago with a girl. All I can say is someone needs to translate what an "ugly day" is.
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Niece
What kind of woman, the best kind. This was a tongue in cheek poke at a broad generality. I have had no such comments in my life to live with.
An ugly day? Wow, that can be sooo varied. LOL I'll save that for another column.
Thanks for stopping through. -
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Cool. I'll look forward to the translation of "ugly day". It should be a good one. lol.
You're welcome for the comment.
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lmao... I can think of a few to ad to this.
how about
"isnt she pretty"
"whatcha doing?"
"how do I look?",
"guess what!"
Or my all time favorite is the pause, followed by the quiet sigh, followed by, I loved it...
Hehehee What a clever column
Lots of fun
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And the all important killer, "Do you know what today is?"
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You better know or the couch will be sprinkled with itching powder before you go to bed
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Nah, I'll have to sleep in the tool shed. on the hay bales covered with itching powder.
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Thanks for the additions. I can't remember them all, I am only a guy after all. LOL
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Well they are all so very important. We woman have at least 20 phrases you men are just supposed to know...! And then there are all the special occasion phrases that shouldnt go ignored
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I only got 9 out of 20? Well that is still an awesome batting average.
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not really
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Well it is for a baseball player. LOL
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Lmao!
These are so true and funny, these are words expressed evry day and we don't realize we are saying them.
When my husband Tony pisses me off i always tell him that my next husband will more obidient. lol.
I also tell him i don't give a shit what men think...because they don't do it often lol.
Loves ya!
Dolores x -
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What we don't THINK often? Sure we do, the ball game, um sex, um, ... Well we do.
LOL thanks
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Ah...the 'code'
Obviously the musings of a wise and experienced man.
Paul -
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Paul,
I think the next is a column on our responses. You know like 'Yes dear' LOL
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Oh Buddy you have a few things here, that should help so many out, me also, now what were those words again.
Riftkin -
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I think the appropriate words here are, ' Yes, ma'am.'
Thanks, glad you enjoyed.
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