I've always been a fan of Elvis. Then again, who wasn't/isn't? He was the greatest entertainer who ever lived. There may be singers you like more but nobody will ever be as famous as Elvis was, or have the same combination of talents, virtues and dumb luck that he had to do what he did, and on the scale that he did it. The man was a phenomenon. He owned the 50's.
While surfing YouTube the other day, I stumbled upon a video discussing the possibility that Elvis faked his own death. I'm a bit of a sucker for conspiracy theories as it is, mainly because the world has been stripped of mystery by science so I'm always hoping there are still a few good ones left. Spend a little time on any website listing the reasons Elvis might be alive and you'll start to believe it, too. There were a lot of reasons he might have, including death threats from the mafia, and the theories are very convincing. But that's not my reason for writing today.
While doing my own little investigation of whether Elvis faked his death with help from the FBI's Witness Protection Program and is now 73 years old, bearded, and living in the Bahamas under an alias while secretly helping the U.S. government fight the war on drugs as a secret agent, I started watching other videos about his life and a great sadness gradually fell over me, to my surprise, particularly when watching the videos of him when he was younger.
I've been trying to figure out why, other than the obvious fact that he almost certainly is dead and the conspiracy theories, though convincing, are really nothing more than simple denial made complex by fans who weren't ready to say goodbye to him. Elvis was only 42 when he died in 1977. That's too early for anyone, but especially an internationally adored entertainer. I think I've figured out the other reasons thinking about Elvis makes me so sad.
1. The loss of what he might have accomplished, which is true of any untimely death, but particularly so with someone who is world famous and has the ability to influence millions.
2. His boyish charm in his innocent beginning to his gradual drug addiction and increasing emotional pain mirrors the loss of innocence and increasing emotional pain in America which took place between 1950 and 1977. Elvis couldn't return to his innocent, carefree past. America can't, either. It will never be that way again. In the wake of the victories in World Wars 1 and 2, Americans were secure, fat and happy. Only husbands had to work and the nation generally was prosperous.
Movies were wholesome, inspiring audiences to rise above their baser instincts, unlike most film today. Stars didn't cuss like sailors as they do now, male or female. (Can you imagine Doris Day or Katherine Hepburn using the F word?)
Aside from that, people just looked great. Men wore suits and women wore dresses to go outdoors. They had class. Today, everyone looks like they just came from a backyard barbecue no matter where they are. In the 50's, men were skinny and women were chubby and everyone was happier. Now, men have to be "buffed" and women have to be toothpicks while somehow managing to maintain large breasts. Since breasts are mainly fat, this, of course, is not natural so plastic surgeons are getting rich by tying bags of saline to women's ribcages. In the 50's, people aged gracefully because there were few to no plastic surgeons to tighten them up every few years. Now, people allow quacks to mutilate them so they can look like wax dummies; doppelgangers of their former selves. Sadly, even the king's widow, Priscilla Presley, has had the full treatment herself, losing the character and warmth her face once had, and that all older people should have as smiling and laughing shapes their faces. When she used to smile, it lit up the room. Now, nothing happens. Her face is so tight from lifts and Botox, when she smiles, nothing moves. It's a little frightening. She has become a symbol of our time just as Elvis was a symbol of his. And whatever happened to the Hippocratic Oath doctors are supposed to operate by - "First, do no harm"? The "doctor" who took the rest of Michael Jackson's nose off should be in a jail cell, not practicing medicine.
The carefree gaiety of the 50's is gone and we've become overworked and terrified of aging and a variety of other things that commercials and the news tell us we should be afraid of. I watch old movies and almost feel like crying, and not only during the sad parts. It's the sweetness and innocence that breaks my heart. What happened to us? When comparing movies then with movies today and what they say about our society, I can't help coming away with the feeling that we have become ugly and dirty of mind and spirit. Our main concern today is with the exterior facade, not the finer, invisible qualities.
3. Photography. If people weren't screwed up enough about aging before the invention of photography, that definitely finished us off. Never before have we been able to measure our own age-related deterioration so thoroughly. How much harder must it have been for Elvis or any star whose career depended on his sex appeal? It's no wonder they're running to the plastic surgeon every time they see evidence of aging, and no wonder all of us sigh when we look at faded photographs of ourselves, captured in the full bloom of youth, wishing we could have stopped time forever on that day. I get the same feeling of despair when I watch Elvis cavorting on the beach with some starlet as I do when I see photos of myself at 21. This element of the Elvis-induced sadness is typical and universal. Nobody likes the transitory nature of youth and life itself. As Bertrand Russell wrote, "Mortality is the source of all suffering." Ironically, Russell was a rabid atheist most of his life but had a sudden and massive conversion toward the end, denouncing everything he had ever written against belief in the afterlife. Maybe he was hedging his bets, or maybe he realized near the end that because of the inherently transient nature of human life, we can never be completely happy here. People tend to get more religious as they get older, as if they're cramming for their final exam. Still, it would be one hell of a cruel joke if, after so much suffering, there was no reward, no redemption or compensation. i.e., "Life is a bitch, then you die." I don't want to believe that of my life, or Elvis' life. Rewards in the afterlife should be in proportion to the joy we gave to others on earth.
4. If Elvis, who had everything, can't hide from death, what chance do any of us have? The answer, of course, is none. Someday we will all stop breathing, as he did. So whatever we're going to do, we'd better get it done. Assuming there is a heaven where we can all hang out and continue to do whatever art we're practicing here, there will be musical instruments, paintbrushes, clay to mold and marble to chip, so we can just goof off all our lives and achieve our goals in heaven, if we make the cut. But if you don't believe that, you better get busy, friend.
5. Surfing the Elvis tribute sites, one can't help but notice the similarities between Elvis and Jesus. Photos abound with Elvis in his white jumpsuit and cape held up by outspread arms like angel wings and captions over them saying "Elvis is watching over us." Of course, to Christians, this is blasphemy and a violation of one of the Ten Commandments - "Thou shalt have no other Gods before me." However, I think this comparison, though wrong, is understandable. Fans of Elvis love him for the same reason Christians love Jesus - because he was human. He was vulnerable, like we are. He felt temptation, like we do. He made mistakes and ultimately died because of them. We don't "love" God. We admire and fear God but we don't and can't "love" Him because we perceive Him to be perfect. Jesus, however, like Elvis, was not perfect. As great as He was, He was like us, and he died, like all of us will. We admire others for their perfection, but we love them for their imperfections.
6. Accomplishment. I'm not exactly a type-A social climber. In fact, I am quite content to sit on a mountaintop all day listening to music and watching clouds roll by. But I do want to do SOMETHING meaningful with this brief little snippet of time called My Life. I have chosen writing, a lonely profession, and spend a lot of time writing poetry, the bastard child of literature. The chances of becoming famous as a poet in America are about as good as my pooping a gold brick. Then I look at a life like Elvis's (I like putting the apostrophe s on the end of names that end with s. Don't bust my chops about it) and how much it is possible to accomplish not only in one lifetime but in one short lifetime and I feel like a stick in the mud. It's not just the adulation I want, though I would be lying if I said the desire for respect for what I do was not part of it. What I really want is to know I'm making full use of whatever gifts I was given or earned and not squandering them and this precious little bit of time I've been given. Studying the lives of any great person arouses the same discontent with what I've done so far, or haven't done, and the desire to push myself beyond my boundaries. This sadness is only relieved by positive action and the occasional pat on the back for doing something that's meaningful to me, and doing it well.
7. Drugs, drugs, drugs. If the devil ever had a better tool for destroying people, I don't know what it is. Of course, there is war, disease and cars, but all of them put together don't ruin lives as much as drugs and alcohol. They just do it slower. I lost my only sibling to an overdose in 1997 after a 15 year heroin addiction so trust me on this one. Elvis overdosed on prescription medication, having become dependent on sleeping pills. One has to presume insomnia that serious is a sign of a deeply troubled mind. He considered his divorce from Priscilla a great, personal failure and mourned it till the day he died. Drugs can ease sorrow and pain. That's what makes them alluring and conceals their danger. As long as there are drugs, we will lose great spirits like Elvis and all the other artists who have fallen for their false peace. Here's a short list -
Matthew Ansara - actor - son of Michael Ansara and Barbara Eden
Bridgette Andersen - child actress - Savannah Smiles
John Belushi - comedian/actor
Tommy Bolin - Deep Purple musician
Elisa Bridges - Playboy Playmate
Lenny Bruce - comedian
Tim Buckley - musician
Casey Calvert - Hawthorne Heights Musician
Truman Capote - writer
Steve Clark - Def Leppard musician
Montgomery Clift - actor
Dorothy Dandridge - actress
Nick Drake - musician
Kevin DuBrow - musician
Bobby Duncum - Jr. - professional wrestler
John Entwistle - musician
Brian Epstein - Beatles manager
Chris Farley - comedian/actor
Rainer Werner Fassbinder - film director
Keith Ferguson - The Fabulous Thunderbirds - musician
Judy Garland - musician/actress
Talitha Getty - actress/socialite - heroin - Rome - 1971
Trevor Goddard - actor (Australian actor in JAG)
Tim Hardin - musician
Bobby Hatfield - musician
Mitch Hedberg - comedian/actor
Margeaux Hemingway - model/actress
Jimi Hendrix - musician (sleeping pills)
Billie Holiday - jazz singer - composer
Shannon Hoon - musician
Anissa Jones - actress (Buffy from Family Affair.)
Russell Jones - musician
Janis Joplin - musician
Heath Ledger - actor
Donyale Luna - model
Phil Lynott - musician
Frankie Lymon - musician
David McComb - musician
Aimee Semple McPherson - evangelist
Jonathan Melvoin - musician
Keith Moon - musician
Marilyn Monroe - actress
Jim Morrison - musician (fatal heart attack triggered by a heroin overdose)
Brad Nowell - musician - Sublime
Lani O'Grady - actress - Eight Is Enough
Bryan Ottoson - musician
Gram Parsons - musician
Robert Pastorelli - actor
Christopher Pettiet - actor (The Young Riders)
Christopher Penn - actor
Kristen Pfaff - musician
River Phoenix - actor (Stand by Me)
Rob Pilatus - acting singer Milli Vanilli
Edgar Allan Poe - author
Pola - model
Freddie Prinze - comic - actor Chico and the Man )self-inflicted gunshot wound while under the influence of Quaaludes)
Glenn Quinn - actor (U.S. TV series Angel)
Dee Dee Ramone - musician
Elis Regina - Brazilian singer
Brad Renfro - actor (Bully, Ghost World)
Bon Scott - singer AC/DC (Aspiration brought on by alcohol intoxication)
Edie Sedgwick - model/actress
Bobby Sheehan musician - Blues Traveler
Hillel Slovak guitarist - Red Hot Chili Peppers
Anna Nicole Smith - actress and media celebrity
Layne Staley - musician
Gary Thain - bass guitarist, Uriah Heep
Ike Turner - musician
Enrique Urquijo - Spanish musician
Sid Vicious - musician
Andrew Wood - musician and singer
Paula Yates - TV personality
It's amazing to me that anyone still uses hard drugs, particularly famous people who supposedly "have everything." Maybe that's one of the lessons we can learn from Elvis' death - that nobody ever has everything, no matter how great their lives look. They only seem perfectly happy until you get to know them and find out that they're human, too.
I can't help thinking that Elvis was too hard on himself as he got older, put on weight and started losing his looks. That might be the second lesson we can learn from his death - to be more gentle with and acceptant of ourselves and others for imperfections. Rigid denial of our own humanity can destroy a king from the inside out. It can destroy us and our most precious relationships the same way.
Just thinking out loud. Thanks for reading.
Included in the list
Add a comment
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
-
Enjoyed the ponderment.
-
Hi Mark,
LOL... I'm not going to go into serious detail about your comment on Gloria Steinem, except to say the whole point of the exercise is that woman/men should have choice. While I do understand what you mean, understand also that even back in the day of yore there were woman who were single,widowed,divorced, husbands ran out on them. They had to earn a living and were seriously underpaid even for what they did do, and couldn't get jobs for where their true talents lie. Why is it that if a man doesn't want to be married and have children he is called a bachelor, if its a woman she's a spinster? Don't forget during world war ll it was the woman in this country that did the mans work. And you know what? Not only were they good at it, but they liked it. And they liked being an active participant of bringing home a paycheck. Trust me, unless you are in the upper class, the average family gives up so much financially to make ends meet just so that mom can stay home with her child. And don't think any mother goes to work not feeling guilty at having to leave her child in day care. Eventually she does have to return to work just to make ends meet. The cost of all the extra's that schools require nowadays makes one feel like they have to take a second job just to provide the simplest of things. And I'm not talking about private schooling. Kindergarten doesn't even provide crayons anymore. The point is, man or woman they should have the choice to work or not and when they do, be paid fairly for it. My brother was a stay at home Dad for years back in the 70's. He was good at it. My sister-in-law hated housework and loved working. I didn't then, and I still don't now the problem in this. I see it as two people doing what they do best. Recognizing it, and ignoring what society says we should be doing. Uh, okay so I did go into detail LOL...sorry for the rant. That said...
Elvis, well, I grew up with Elvis. I danced my first dance to him. Grew up with dreams that he would be singing Blue Hawaii at my wedding. LOL. What a lot of people miss is that he was a trail blazer.He gave the first satellite performance, the first "unplugged" performance. While it was Liberace that he borrowed (with Liberace's blessings) the more flamboyant performances he paved the way for rock bands to expand and experiment with their stage performances. His gospel is just as heart rending as his rock is. He was a balladeer, country (ever here him sing Hank William's Lonesome?) pop, rock he crossed the boards long before they put lines on them. While he would have his temper tantrums, he was still deep down good and kind. Remember he was barely twenty when he became big, and back then, just like the movie studios did, the record label's dictated your life. Entertainers/actors didn't have much say in their business affairs. It's not like today where as an entertainer you are more savvy in your affairs. The thing is, he never got over his Mom's death and he was just beginning to move past Pricilla. He was devoted to his daughter. I agree with you about the doctors though. While those around him may have been "yes men", the doctor has the responsibility to say no and get the man the much needed help he should have had. At least he should have tried harder. The closest I came to Elvis was when he was playing in Tampa Fl. I so wanted to go to the concert, it was a small hall. I was pregnant and my family and doctor were afraid that I would be harmed not from seeing him but from over excited fans.But I do have original photo's of him in his limo with friends during the making of "King Creole and Jail House Rock" It is so sad that he died the way he did. Who will ever know the deep rooted pain he lived with in his head, the torment of his soul. We may not have Elvis here with us but we have his music. He left us a legacy of many kinds. I do so enjoy it when you ponder life. You've come a long way my friend. I'm blessed to be able to call you friend. I do hope all is well in your world.
In love, light and wisdom
Michelle -
Hi Mark,
I left allpoetry for quite a while. Life got too busy for me to write! Can you believe that? It boiled down to what you said. We really need "to be more gentle with and acceptant of ourselves and others for imperfections" I have an impossible work load (to which more is usually added). And it's almost as if people have lost the grace to simply empathise with others! I have PCOS, endometriosis and a host of other domino-effect conditions. And sometimes I just want to scream, "Oh for goodness sake give me a damn break!" at the people around me. Then it hit me. They won't. So I have to do it. I have to close my eyes to them and give myself a break. I have to make the time to write.
Another thing that touched me about your write is when you speak of men and women and how they've changed. That physical change just mirrors a deeper one. I believe that women were made in a certain way for a certain reason. There were things women weren't meant to do. And things men weren't meant to do. And since both sexes apparently have some kind of contest on to prove something to each other so that more stupid generalisations can be made... both sexes are suffering.
You didn't mention this. And I'm not sure you agree with this statement but I don't think "youth" is worshipped or idealised anymore. If it were, then young kids wouldnt be dressed up like adults and adult decisions foisted on them. Thier faces wouldnt be painted so much. If youthful, natural beauty were worshipped... why put so much paint on a child's face? What's with that?
As for drugs... I don't know what else there is to treat the sky-rocketing amount of physical and psychological illnesses people are coming down with. It's frightening. I opted for holistic medicine to treat my PCOS though. I can see how easily people could have (accidental) over-doses though. They take medication to numb the sickness so they can go on with life to please others. Other people don't want to be understanding when someone gets sick. They just want a 100% of the time efficient employee, entertainer etc. There's no room to be human anymore! -
-
Hi Marissa,
You're right on the money about giving to yourselves what others won't or can't. Imagine if we were as hard on ourselves as others are? There would be no place to hide! lol I'm glad to hear you're good to yourself. You don't need the additional stress, and it will only aggravate the physical conditions you're trying to control.
Re. the competition between men and women, I'm 100% with you again. I think the ERA and the women's liberation movement was the worst thing to happen to women and men. It's a good thing that women are able to work and get equal pay now (though that's still not always the case) but I would be willing to bet that women in the 50's in general were happier than women are today, for many reasons. Here are two -
1) They controlled men's dog-like instincts. There was still shame associated with sleeping around. There was a double-standard and there still is now to a lesser degree, but because men knew they had to marry the woman they wanted to be with her sexually, women were in control of men. Now women can't find a decent, faithful man because so many other women are giving it away for nothing.
2) If having a career is so great, why are so many women less happy? It sounds chauvinistic but I think it's because women are nest builders. They are designed to give birth to and nurture children, not climb corporate ladders. Men are the type-A freaks that need to compete with each other to feel like their lives have meaning. Since the dawn of man, women have played with and comforted children while men went off to fight their stupid wars. But somehow, geniuses like Gloria Steinem convinced women that there is no difference between them and men, and they are suffering for that. There are HUGE differences, as you pointed out.
I think older people worship youth, but children have always wanted to be older. When we're young, we want to be older. When we're old, we want to be young. I know what you mean about all the little prosti-tots showing off their little butt cracks, etc. It's just another way this society is messed up. They have no idea how much respect they're losing from the boys they're trying to impress because they don't understand the male mind yet.
Have you read "Natural Cures They Don't Want You to Know About" by Kevin Trudeau? There are some exaggerations in it but I think the basic premise is true - that the pharmaceutical industry and the FDA are working hand in hand to promote toxic drug use and discourage natural cures because vitamins, etc., can't be patented but drugs can, and they make billions from them. Anywhere that kind of money is circulating, there is going to be corruption. I'm glad you chose the holistic path. As you know, every drug has side effects, which creates the need for other drugs, which create more side effects, etc., etc. Eventually, the person becomes a walking medicine cabinet, which is exactly what the pharmaceutical industry wants us to be. I'm convinced that it is the most evil institution in history. There are a lot of drugs that do help people, but in almost every case, these people could help themselves more with a holistic approach and bombardment with natural remedies that people in other parts of the world have been using for centuries. Of course, it's also wise to remember the old adage, "An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure." We should all be living in the Swiss Alps eating yoghurt and berries, not the fast food we're all addicted to. lol
Sorry for the rant but you made so many good points, I didn't want to give you a half-ass response.
Take care of yourself and congrats again on your recent adventure. Maybe it's time to write the story about Stonehenge! (Hint hint)
Mark
-
-
Sunshine,
You speak a lot of truths. People dont really like the truth, they rather the lie they have created around their lives. I like the truth. I see what we are doing to ourselves and our country and it creates great saddness in my heart.
Nicely done my friend, as always,
Criss -
-
Thanks, Criss. Me, too. I hope it swings the other direction again soon, though I don't know how it can. It's a rat race, and the rats are winning.
-
-
Can you read my mind?
I have spent many hours (days, years) thinking about everything you've mentioned in this excellent commentary! It's hard for me to comment on this subject because it is one that causes me much distress and sorrow. Elvis is the perfect example of what can happen to a once beautiful person! Time deprives us of so many things..our once attractive physical appearance, our vim, our vigor, our memory, our health; often, our enthusiasm for life! It takes strength of character and a lot of wisdom to handle aging gracefully. Hopefully, in the future, we will have figured out better ways than plastic surgery to improve the way we look as we grow old.
Thank you for writing this fine article today. It's good to know I'm not the only one who needs to come to grips with aging. When Elvis passed away (I'm sure he's gone), I broke down crying when I saw him as he looked and acted at the age of 42 compared to his youthful good looks and the joy he inspired and felt in his 20's. It still makes me sad thinking about it today. I'm one of the people who has paid tribute to Elvis at YouTube. In fact, I've made several videos of him (and there are no pictures of him in any of the videos that show him older than his early 30's). Fans want to remember him as he was when we first discovered him, not as he was when he "gave up the ghost". It has been said that maybe Elvis gave us all he had to give and that is why he left us so soon. I think there may be some truth to that..he didn't want to spend the rest of his life repeating what he had already done over and over and over (yet that is what he had been doing for several years before he died). There are some people who are capable of re-inventing themselves over and over. Elvis was not one of them. I hope all of us will discover new ways each day to keep life exciting and new (although it's not an easy thing to do).
Thanks again for sharing your thoughts with us!
Maureen
-
-
Maureen,
I think you're absolutely right about Elvis' last years. I read Elvis and Me by Priscilla Presley and know he was a hard man to get along with. Her and the others in his circle were on edge most of the time because of his mood swings and controlling personality, which was probably a result of his getting everything he wanted and all of his needs being taken care of by others so early in life. Only a few were brave enough to tell him what he needed to hear rather than what he wanted to hear. So like all of us, he could be unpleasant to be around sometimes, which is the main point of my column, of course. I think you're right that Elvis felt he had given all he had and didn't see any point in doing the same thing forever. That's probably true of many artists who leave too soon, particularly men who tend to define themselves by their careers more than women do. I just wish he could have retired and enjoyed a quiet life at Graceland, returned to his simpler roots, etc.
Then again, considering how increasingly cruel the tabloids have become to celebrities over the years, it's a safe bet they would have torn into Elvis for getting old if he were alive today. They love to kick people when they're down and the rags sell by the millions because there is a fine line between adoration and envy. People with small, tormented lives who never accomplished much are the first to kick a star in the teeth when some tragedy befalls them, as if to say, "Good! You're not such a big shot now, are you?" It's an ugly aspect of the human character and the tabloids feed off it.
Please let me know your username at YouTube so I can watch your videos. I'd love to see them.
Great to hear from you, as always.
Mark
-
-
Great column Mark
Never read anyone's column before. Good as our local paper? You bet!
My oldest brother was in Korea in the transportation
unit that Elvis was in, though he said he never met him. I worked at The Las Vegas Hilton for twenty-five years. Elvis' was the first show that opened the doors of the hotel. I think they still have the bronze statue of him just outside the show-room.
John -
-
AM,
Very cool. I wish I could have seen Elvis in concert but my parents weren't big fans and he died when I was 14. (If he actually died.)
Thanks,
Mark
-
-
Again Mark, you have displayed your amazing wisdom. Again I want to print off what you have written and show it to everyone I know and force them to read it. But you can't force wisdom upon people they need to want to receive it. I guess that's one of the biggest problems in this world as well as drugs!!
-
-
Hey Bex,
That's for sure. I stopped trying to talk to people a long time ago. Unless they come to you begging for help, there's no chance of changing them. Even if they do, it's still next to impossible. We can't spare them from making the mistakes we've made, or save them from making their own. Everyone has to have their own journey and take their own lumps. The best we can do (usually) is provide a dependable friendship for them. -
-
As you have provided friendship to me, and whatever wisdom you wish to impart to me Mark, I'll soak up like a sponge!! It's getting to the stage now that you are way up there on my list of people who I'll go to for advice, (second to my dad i think) I so wish you and Claudia were not so far away. I have a feeling that your wisdom has a lot to do with having a wonderful woman who compliments your qualities at your side!! I can't wait to meet you both.
-
-
Adding your comment:
1 - 13 of 13
