Deep Breath

I'm getting sick and tired of worrying about everyone and then getting shut out. This may seem similar to Charla's rant but i'm feeling the same way too. I keep getting shut out by everyone and anyone I put trust in always betrays me. I'm sick of collecting false friends.

I'm getting behind on work at the moment and I know they're only GSCE's as people keep telling me, but i'm getting fed up of getting distracted from my work just to be told that I wouldn't understand, it's not important or it's my fault! I don't see how half the things i'm getting blamed for can be my fault.I understand more than everyone realises, and if you're going to get me worked up and worried and then not tell me because I won't understand, I really don't see the point in asking how you are anymore.

I have anxiety issues and i'm trying to step back but i'm having big problems with it and i can't. I've even been told to see a GP about it and it's starting to look more friendly than putting up with it everyday. It's in my nature to worry and people don't understand. I'm so worked up and i just don't know anymore.

Please if you have a problem just tell me. If you have issues with me tell me. But don't leave me to worry.

Half the things people are blaming on me aren't my fault but i get depressed because you believe it's my fault.

Everyone seems to be changing, people are losing their edge but that doesn't mean you give up. I'm fed up of picking up everyone's pieces everytime they break down, i can't deal with that, work, exams and family issues. I'm detaching myself from everyone and having moments surrounded by people but feeling so alone which is how I used to feel when my friends started to turn on me before high school.

So I guess i'm trying to say...I want you all to tell me things, please don't under-estimate me and I don't want to lose you but your changing so much and i feel like im fighting a losing battle. And i can't help unless you admit you need and try because at the moment your lost...