One day in the city of Portland, there was a man named Hubert Brown. He was very tall, had weak muscles, was around the age of 45 and his significant brain was 10 times the size of a basketball. If you want to know why his brain is so humongous, it is because he is a famous scientist. For a little more detail about Hubert, well, you see, umm, how can I explain. Ah! You see, not all scientists are bright and cordial, and needless to say, Hubert is one of those scientists. It is because he always is grumpy, melodramatic, unexceptionally rude and has an act for being a smart alic and smart mouth. Hubert is not normal like everyone else in the city. He eats sushi while drinking soy milk. He believes in science only. He does not believe in the things normal citizens believe in. For example, television, fast food, all the holidays normal citizens celebrate, like Halloween, Christhmas, St. Patrick’s Day, Valentines Day and so on. Now if I may, let me begin the story.
Later in his lab that day, he was working on a experiment. Hubert was mixing a potion. Right next to him was a list of ingredients he had written down. “Bat liver, check. Squid intestine, check. Saint Hiklebuni’s Guide To Raising Chaos, check. Sir Fickle Guber’s Guide To Suspecting Paranoid People, check. Cat brains, check. 1 cup of Jennifer Anniston's blood, check. Koala spleen, check. 2 quarts of llama spit, check. And finally Mom’s science trophy made of glass. I really don’t feel guilty for doing this.” And with that, he held the trophy and smashed it on the side of the table he was working at. It smashed into smithereens. Hubert took out a brown paper bag and slid all the broken pieces of the trophy in the bag. “Okay, now to put in the ingredients.”
Hubert took out a gigantic cauldron. In the cauldron was a lot of hot, steaming, boiling water. Hubert picked up the ingredients one by one and dumped them in the cauldron. After all of them were in there, he took out a big ladle and stuck the bottom of it in the cauldron. Then he started stirring. As time passed by while he was still stirring, the liquid started to look like a sickly green as if someone just finished yurping. Finally after about an hour or two, Hubert stopped stirring. He took his hands out of the cauldron and took out a minuscule glass. Next Hubert took the ladle and dipped it in the liquidy goop. He took out the ladle again, held it up in the direction of the mouth of the glass and flipped the ladle over. The greenish goop poured into the glass.
He set down the ladle on the flat surface of the table. “Before I test this drink, for some reason I just need to say Mom’s old saying, Science is always a virtue!” {sigh} “Man I love saying that! May this experiment be successful and eternal. Well now to test. Cheers!” Hubert opened his mouth, held the glass to his chapped lips and swigged the gooey liquid. Suddenly, he dropped the glass on the floor. The glass broke and shattered into a million tiny pieces. He threw himself to the ground. His whole entire body was wiggling and jiggling like a rattle snake shaking with fury. His throat was on fire. He was choking and gasping for air. It was as if he was dying. Outside, you could see the window. And then there was a big KABOOOOOOOM!!!! The roof emerged high into the air and fell back onto it’s rightful place. The windows broke. Back inside the laboratory, Hubert was still on the floor. Finally, he got back up to his feet. He felt different, as if he were reborn. He ran to his large mirror. He looked into it and his mouth dropped wide open.
“Oh... my... God. What... happened... to... me?!? It must’ve been the potion! but how? This is incredible!” Right infront of him was not a tall, weak muscled, crazy haired man, instead before him, was a weird looking creature. The creature had finger and toe nails as sharp as scythes. He was 4 times shorter than he used to be. His teeth were as pointy as an elephant’s tusks. His hair was as untidy as ever before. His eyes were like devil’s blood shot red eyes. And his skin was not white but red. He had tufts of red hair all over his body. His hair was bluish and black as if his head were made of flames.
Hubert turned around and was looking towards at the broken windows. “Let’s see what I can do.” He broke into a run and jumped out the window. “ As he was in the air, his body was in the position of a lion jumping and attacking. “Aruuuuu!!!” He landed onto ground on all fours. People were starting to stare at him with worried, frightened expressions on their faces.
“Hey fur ball, will you put a sock in it! I’m try’n ter sleep!” said an old man who was resting on blankets on the edge of the sidewalk.
“Now you’re asking for it!” Hubert boomed in a scruffy voice. Suddenly out of nowhere, police cars were driving towards him. Then they stopped. The police all jumped out of the car and took out their guns.
“Hey Mr. Hairy Sir, would please hold your hands up?!?” said one of the officers.
“Now what did I do?” Hubert said in a unpleasant tone.
“Well it looked like you were trying to terrorize that poor old man.”
“He was angering me! And yes I was. But since I now see you are here, I guess I’ll be going back to my lab. Look, I’m sorry, but I was testing a potion and I guess it must’ve gone awry. I promise it won’t happen again officer.”
“Okay. Be happy that you’re acquitted for now. Because if I see you trying to attack some one like that again, you’re to go have a date with the judge and then probably a date with jail. And you’ll be guilty and will be sorry. So don’t do that again. You hear me?”
“Yes officer.”
“All right. Come on gang, let’s get back to the station.” The officers put their guns back into their pockets, got in the car and drove off.
Hubert walked back towards the Science building. A few minutes later, he stepped into his lab. The next day, he was his normal self again. He went to go shopping for clothes his beast. He hadn’t named him yet. He thought a name for his beast wouldn’t matter. Hubert rarely went shopping for clothes. When he goes shopping, his taste for clothing is no way close to being impeccable. After awhile at choosing clothes that fit his beast at Macy’s, he went to the counter to buy the clothes. “Umm, how much will that be?”
“$335.89.”
“What! You gotta be kidding me! This is perpostrious! I need these clothes! Please, I’ll do anything, anything I tell you!!!!”
Hubert groveled for hours and hours, but he couldn’t persuade the clerk to lend him the clothes. “Silence. I will have no more begging! You should behave with dignity to the other people. And not be some whiny selfish baby! You see, whining is not going to get you anywhere if you think you absolutely have to have clothes. Just act calm. Now I shall have you leave this store at once! On with you!” And the clerk pushed Hubert all the way out of the store.
Hubert returned to his lab scowling. “If I can’t have what I want, then I’m not going to be needing this anymore.” He picked up the cauldron, walked to one of the broken windows and poured the potion onto the sidewalk. Then he dropped the cauldron and the cauldron landed with a loud “THUD” on the sidewalk. “Well that’s that. Oh well. I thought I looked like an idiot when I was a beast. I’ll go downstairs and enjoy some sushi and soy milk.” He walked towards the exit and went down the stairs. He lived beastly ever after.
A story that's a mix between Dr. Jekeyl and Mr. Hyde and Frankenstein.
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