Bootybaby• Show poetry

describe myself. i have a  gorgous boyfriend calle dan he makes me very happy although one thing i miss is a child so iwrite i love to write i find it easier than saying it.once i put pen to paper i cant stop all my feelings just flow onto the paper. they hurt peoples feelings sometimes but i suffer most with this.......Most people who have not dealt with infertility don't realize that it touchs every area of your life. It becomes a financial, marital, emotional, and physical ordeal that can stress your marriage. There are many decisions to make along the way about new doctors, treatments, how much to spend, how long to keep trying, etc...Meanwhile, it can also affect your sex life, making it mechanical and something you dread. I found at times that it also affected my self-esteem; you know in your head that you're valuable, but at times you feel like a failure. It's also difficult because there seems to be no closure. It is a real grieving process that can go on and cycles through for several years. People don't realize there is a real loss, the loss of a baby that you've always dreamed of having, the loss of getting to do motherly things. It's hard when all your friends around you are getting pregnant. You begin to feel like you don't fit in with them any more since, understandably, they talk a lot about their new babies and children. Baby showers are especially hard at times; you dream of the day when you might get to have one. Friends and family try to be encouraging and comforting. They mean well, but you get tired of hearing comments like, "Just relax, you're trying too hard," or "Go have a romantic evening out," or "You're still young, you've got lots of time left." These get old quick. You just want people to listen and acknowledge the fact that it's difficult.
its how i feel........