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Beautiful Arms


  • Mishielle
    April 22, 2004
    Reply
    My love has beautiful arms
    ones that aren't all torn up by scars
    He is mentally stable in all the right ways
    He has never been locked up for his mind being astray
    Some times i question if we were meant to be
    but you see, my heart can only belong to he
    He leads me in all the right directions
    and never question my intentions
    Although we may differ in many ways
    in our eyes you can see our love, and it will be there always
    Still i think of his unscared arms
    and pray to the Lord above that we will not soon depart
    he is my beauty and my passion
    if we weren't together, I don't know what would happen

  • sporkifye
    April 22, 2004
    Reply
    It feels like this piece is unfinished, as though there's something more that you could say about your love. And in a way, I think that feeling of 'to be continued' works really well, making it feel more like the relationship will continue, and therefore so will this poem. Just one chapter.
    There's two ways to take the image of his beautiful arms... one is the undeniable fact that muscular arms are incredibly attractive, and the other is the feelings conveyed by their being free of scars. That comment reminds me of all the cutting poetry on here, and makes me think that with the image you're saying he doesn't suffer from that kind of depression, that maybe he's well balanced and somehow those arms of his are your comfort because of it.
    ~^_^~

  • LittlePariah09
    June 17, 2004
    Reply
    I loved that so much...it sounds a lot like my boyfriend and me...and I agree with sporkifye, it does seem like it could have another "chapter" or something...

  • divexintoxlife
    June 19, 2004
    Reply
    I think you could write the opposite to this poem . . . and it would have the same effect. the effect that the reader knows you are lying about your love. the reader knows that you question his arms, his scars and the truth that his arms are really beautiful. i, as the reader get the feeling that the narrator is mentally unstable, unable to tell the truth and lying to herself. that is what i was looking for throughout the whole piece. you didn't turn your words around to reveal that . . . but that's just the feeling i got. for example... i wondered why you'd mention cut arms, mental stability and his trust in the first place... why mention that fact that his does not have those faults? unless the narrator was truly unstable and just lying about her love to mask the fact that he really was all of those things that you said he was not.

    I loved the piece, I thought it was well written and had great charisma on the part of the narrator. I honestly was looking for the "next chapter" and i didn't mind that it was absent. I'm sorry if i totally took the meaning of your piece the wrond way and you did mean to convey that the "love" was truly a beautiful man. i hope that if you did mean to convey him as beautiful person, that you understand where i was coming from when i said that it could be taken the opposite way. I'd love to know what you really interpreted it as and if you see where i was coming from. Thankyou for sharing this poem.

    Best Regards & God Bless. Kate

  • Mishielle
    June 19, 2004
    Reply
    NO OTHER CHAPTER, get over it
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