Hello. *taps microphone* Is this- is this on? Yes. Sooo...
*cricket chirps*
...yeah. Here's my page.
*like a robot* press the big red button
http://www.toysforyourblog.com/games/bigred/
http://www.toxin.org/cgi-bin/hugs.cgi
give me hugs here!!!
take a quiz to see if you know me at all! hehe.. i'll bet that you don't get any higher than 60%!
http://www.quizyourfriends.com/take-quiz.php?id=0907021919497826&a=1&
_________________________about me__________________________
my name is Alaura (aka Lola) and I live in California. I was born in Colorado and then lived in Nevada before finally settling here. my parents are seperated and have been so for over ten years. i am in highschool and single. i am in between beliefs religiously but i know what i want in life. i am bisexual but i don't mind being single. all i really know is that i am hungry.
_________________________My AP family________________________
My AP fam is:
Bros- Uthremdetiago
lowercase prelude
Aquario.N.Solaris
Sisterz-ChocolateLoverGirl
Erozay
DarkestNoon
Shadow Love
Fraternal twin- Chocolate Dime
mom- noir mariposa...x
uncle- wander of the sky
aunt- Reptile Lady
cousin- Sky Princess
Niece- xX Mita Xx
InsanityDies
pet- princess of my love
Friends-too many to name
____________________Other things about me__________________
Place an X by all the things you've done, or remove the X from the ones you have not, and send it to all of your friends (including me). This is for your entire life!
( ) Smoked a cigarette
( ) Drank so much you threw up
(x) Had feelings for someone who didn't have them back
( ) Been arrested
( ) Gone on a blind date
( ) Skipped school
( ) Seen someone die
( ) Been to Canada
( ) Been to Florida
( ) Been to Mexico
(X) Been on a plane
(X) Been lost
( x) Been on the opposite side of the country
(x ) Gone to Washington , DC
(X) Swam in the ocean
(X) Felt like dying....
(X) Cried yourself to sleep
(X) Played cops and robbers
(X) Recently colored with crayons
(X) Sang karaoke badly
( ) paid for a meal with only coins
(X) Done something you told yourself you wouldn't
(X) Made prank phone calls
(X) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose
( ) Laughed until liquid came out of the other end
(X) Caught a snowflake on your tongue.
(X) Danced in the rain
(X) Written a letter to Santa Claus
( ) Been kissed under the mistletoe
(X) Watched the sun rise with someone you care about
(X) Blown bubbles
( ) Made a bonfire on the beach
( ) Crashed a party
(X) Gone roller-skating
(x ) Ice-skating
001. Real name → alaura
002. Nickname(s)→ lola, lo, lola bella, bella, princess snooters
003. Status → single
005. Male or Female → female
006. Elementary → patterson
007. Middle School → patterson
008. High School → patterson
009. College → i havn't gone to college yet
010. Hair color → light brown
011. Long or short → short
012. Loud or Quiet → depends
013. Sweats or Jeans → both
014. Phone or Camera → Camera phone
015. Health freak → no
017. Do you have a crush on someone? → no
018. Eat or Drink → both.
019. Piercings → ear
020. Tattoos → not yet
FIRSTS:
023. First piercing → ear.
024. First best friend → amy
025. First Award → attendence
026. First crush → forgot
027. First pet → dog named teo
028. First big vacation → hawaii
030. First big birthday → i dunno
CURRENTLY:
049. Eating → nothing.
050. Drinking → nothing
052. I'm about to → read a book
053. Listening to → nothing
054. Plans for today → read, eat, sleep
055. Waiting on → a boyfriend
OUR FUTURE:
058. Want kids? → 2 thats it
059. Want to get married? → ya to a nice guy
060. Careers in mind → teacher, author
WHICH IS BETTER WITH GUYS?
068. Hair or eyes → both
070. Shorter or taller? → taller
072. Romantic or spontaneous → both
073. Nice stomach or nice arms → both
074. Sensitive or loud → sensitive
075. Hook-up or relationship → Relationship.
077. Trouble maker or hesitant → hesitant
HAVE YOU EVER:
080. Lost glasses/contacts? no, but i have glasses
081. Run away from home → no, no reason to yet
082. Held a gun/knife for self defense → ya, against my asshole neighbor.
083. Killed somebody → nope
084. Broken someone's heart → as far as i no, no
085. Been arrested → never and dont plan on it
087. Cried when someone died → no
DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
089. Yourself → mostly
090. Miracles → definatly
091. Love at first sight → definatly
092. Heaven → i don't know anymore
093. Santa Claus → duh no
094. Sex on the first date → no no no no and NO
095. Kiss on the first date → if it's a good date, yes, most definitely
ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:
097. Is there one person you want to be with right now → no
098. Are you seriously happy with where you are in life → no
099. Do you believe in God → most of the time
100. Are you gay/bisexual → bi
________________________songs_______________________
FIREFLIES
You would not believe your eyes
If ten million fireflies
Lit up the world as I fell asleep
Cause they fill the open air
And leave teardrops everywhere
You'd think me rude, but I
Would just stand and stare.
I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns slowly.
It's hard to say that I'd
Rather stay awake when I'm asleep,
Cause everything is never as it seems.
Cause I'd get a thousand hugs
From ten thousand lightening bugs
As they tried to teach me how to dance.
A foxtrot above my head,
A sock-hop beneath my bed,
The disco ball is just hanging by a thread.
I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns slowly.
It's hard to say that I'd
Rather stay awake when I'm asleep,
Cause everything is never as it seems.
(When I fall asleep.)
Leave my door open just a crack.
(Please take me away from here.)
Cause I feel like such an insomniac.
(Please take me away from here.)
Why do I tire of counting sheep?
(Please take me away from here.)
When I'm far too tired to fall asleep
To ten million fireflies.
I'm weird, cause I hate goodbyes
I got misty eyes as they said farewell.
But I'll know where several are
If my dreams get real bizarre
Cause I saved a few,
And I keep them in a jar.
I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns slowly.
It's hard to say that I'd
Rather stay awake when I'm asleep,
Cause everything is never as it seems.
(When I fall asleep.)
I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns slowly.
It's hard to say that I'd
Rather stay awake when I'm asleep
Because my dreams are bursting at the seams
a poem from one of my contests
A TWISTED FAIRYTALE by CROWD
Once upon a time, there were seven green girls named Alaura.
They loved to eat vegetarian fish while reading Harry Plum, or Stephanie Potter the bounty hunter.
They also enjoyed watching The Pirates Of Anastasia, and Caribbean Potter The Egyptian Prince Of Star Wars.
They love to do most work.
And they love to moon cats with sleeping dogs babies.
They're not religious, but do believe that God made macaroni and cheese with tuna.
So anyway, when the wolf tried to blow down the girls houses, he fell off the beanstalk,
Which caused him to break his glass slipper.
And his porridge was so hot that he gave it to an old lady living in a shoe.
There were seven dwarfs that were in love with the seven green sisters.
But the girls had already given they're love to the Keebler Elves.
So the girls made it home by midnight, as they're carriage turned into a pumpkin pie.
And Thing 1 and Thing 2 cleaned up the mess that the Oompa Loompas made.
Just then Papa Bear came home, and pulled a thorn out of Briar Rabbit's foot.
He then broke a chair over three beds because Goldie locked him out.
Then he kissed a frog while listening to Prince.
And partied like it was 1999 Red Balloons.
And lived happily ever napster...
_________________________cool pics____________________
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|………..|
|………..| Put this on your
|………..| page if you have
|…….O.| ever pushed a
|………..| door that said pull!
|………..|
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(\ /)
( . .)
c(''') (''')
If you'd like to help this bunny with world domination,
please paste him on your Page
/\_/\
(^=.=^)
||_||)/
Copy and paste this kitty for cat power!
Feline Furosiousness! MEOW!
(\ /)
(O.o)
(>" >)
/_|_\ This is Mr. Bunny. Please paste him to your page to help him with his mission to DOMINATE the world!!!
(¯`v´¯)
`*.¸.*´
¸.•´¸.•*¨) ¸.•*¨)
(¸.•´ (¸.•´ .•´ ¸¸.•¨¯`•.
¸.•´¸.•*¨) ¸.•*¨)
(¸.•´ (¸.•´ .•´ ¸¸.•¨¯`•.
________________________ love ________________________
A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty,
He said..no.
She asked him if he would want to be with her forever...and he said no.
She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry,and once again he replied with a no.
She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and
said...
You're not pretty you're beautiful.
I don't want to be with you forever, I NEED to be with you forever.
And I wouldn't cry if you walked away...I'd die.
He gave her 12 roses.11 real and 1 fake and said "I'll love you untill the last one dies."
♀ + ♂ = ♥
♀ + ♀ = ♥
♂ + ♂ = ♥
Love is love
♥Girl: Do I Ever Cross Your Mind?
♥Boy: No
♥Girl: Do You Like Me?
♥Boy: Not Really.
♥Girl: Do You Want Me?
♥Boy: No.
♥Girl: Would You Cry If I Left?
♥Boy: No.
♥Girl: Would You Live For Me?
♥Boy: No.
♥Girl: Would You Do Anything For Me?
♥Boy: No.
♥Girl: Choose- Me Or Your Life.
♥Boy: My Life.
♥The Girl Runs Away In Shock And Pain And The Boy Runs After Her And Says:
♥The Reason You Never Cross My Mind Is Because Your Always On My Mind
♥The Reason I Dont Like You Is Because I Love You
♥The Reason I Dont Want You Is Because I Need You
♥The Reason I Wouldnt Cry If You Left Is Because I Would Die If You Left
♥The Reason I Wouldnt Live For You Is Because I Would Die For You
♥The Reason Im Not Willing To Do Anything For You Is Because I Would Do Everything For You
♥The Reason I Choose My Life Is Because You Are My Life!♥
Cinderella walked on broken glass
Sleeping beauty let a whole lifetime pass
Belle fell in love with a hideous beast
Jasmine married a common thief
Ariel walked on land for love & life
Snow white barely escaped the knife
it was all about blood, sweat, & tears
because love means facing your
BIGGEST FEARS
WHEN I RUN AWAY FROM YOU
- CHASE ME
WHEN I POUT MY LIPS
- KISS ME
WHEN I KICK & PUNCH
- HOLD ME TIGHT
WHEN I CALL YOU A LOSER
- JUST KNOW THAT YOUR MY LOSER
WHEN I AM SILENT
- IM THINKIN OF HOW TO SAY I LOVE YOU
WHEN I IGNORE YOU
- I WANT ALL YOUR ATTENTION
WHEN I PULL AWAY
- GRAB ME BY THE WAIST AND NEVER LET GO
WHEN YOU SEE ME AT MY WORST
- TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL
WHEN I SCREAM AT YOU
- TELL ME YOU LOVE ME AND MEAN IT
WHEN YOU SEE ME WALKING
-SNEAK UP BEHIND ME GRAB ME BY THE WAIST AND GIVE ME A KISS
IF I DONT CALL YOU
- IM WANTING YOU TO CALL ME
WHEN IM SCARED
-HOLD ME AND TELL ME EVERYTHING WILL BE OK CAUSE I'M WITH YOU
WHEN I LOOK LIKE SOMETHINGS THE MATTER
- KISS ME AND TELL ME NOT TO WORRY
WHILE I HOLD YOUR HANDS
- PLAY WITH MY FINGERS
*A girl and guy were speeding, on a motorcycle, over 90 mph on the road..
Girl: Slow down. I’m scared.
Guy: No, this is fun.
Girl: No, it’s not. Please, it’s too scary!
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: Fine, I love you. Slow down!
Guy: Now give me a BIG hug.
*Girl hugs him*
Guy: Can you take my helmet off & put it on yourself? It’s bugging me.
(In the paper the next day)
A motorcycle crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it, but only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized that his breaks broke, but he didn’t want to let the girl know. Instead, he had her say she loved him & felt her hug one last time, then had her wear his helmet so that she would live even though it meant that he would die.
If you would ever do this for someone....then post this on your page asap!!
Girl Facts:
When a girl bumps into your arm while walking with you she wants you to hold her hand
When she wants a hug she will just stand there
When u break a girls heart she still feels it when u run into each other 3 years later
When a girl is quiet, millions of things are running through her mind
When a girl is not arguing, she is thinking deeply
When a girl looks at you with eyes full of questions, she is wondering how long you will be around
When a girl answers, "I'm fine," after a few seconds, she is not at all fine
When a girl stares at you, she is wondering why you are playing games
When a girl lays her head on your chest, she is wishing for you to be hers forever
When a girl says she can't live without you, she has made up her mind that you are her future
When a girl says, "I miss you," no one in this world can miss you more than that
When a girl is mean to you after a break-up she wants you back, but shes scared she'll get hurt and knows you're gone forever
Guy Facts:
When a guy calls you, he wants to be with you
When a guy is quiet, He's listening to you...
When a guy is not arguing, He realizes he's wrong
When a guy says, "I'm fine." after a few minutes he means it
When a guy stares at you, he wishes you would care about him and wonders if you do
When your laying your head on a guy's chest, he has the world
When a guy calls/texts/comments you everyday, he is in love
When a (good) guy tells you he loves you, he means it
When a guy says he can't live without you, he's with you til you're done
When a guy says, "I miss you," he misses you more than you could have ever missed him or anything else
What A Kiss Means
Kiss on the stomach-----"I love you"
Kiss on the Forehead ----"I hope we're together forever"
Kiss on the Ear ---"I'm corny"
Kiss on the Cheek ---"We're friends"
Kiss on the Hand ---"I adore you"
Kiss on the Neck ---"We belong together"
Kiss on the Shoulder ---"I want you"
Kiss on the Lips ---"I love you" OR "I want you"
What the gesture means...
Holding Hands ---"We definitely love each other"
Slap on the Butt ---"That's mine"
Holding on tight ---"I don't want to let go"
Looking into each other's Eyes ---"I just plain love you"
Playing with Hair ---"Tell me you love me"
Arms around the Waist ---"I love you too much to let go"
Laughing while Kissing ---"I am completely Comfortable with you"
Every girl dreams that one day she will find a boy that does these things for her. even the smallest action can have the BIGGEST impact in someones life.
• leave her cute text notes.
• kiss her in front of your friends.
• trust her over everyone else.
• tell her she looks beautiful.
• look into her eyes when you talk to her.
• let her mess with your hair.
• touch her hair.
• just walk around with her.
• forgive her for her mistakes.
• look at her like she`s the only girl you see.
• hold her hand when you`re around your friends.
• when she starts swearing at you, tell her you love her.
• let her fall asleep in your arms.
• get her mad, then kiss her.
• tease her and let her tease you back.
• stay up all night with her when she`s sick.
• watch her favorite movie with her.
• kiss her forehead.
• write her letters.
• when she`s sad, hang out with her.
• let her know she`s important.
• let her take all the photos she wants of you.
• kiss her in the pouring rain.
• when you fall in love with her, tell her,and when you tell her, love her like you`ve never loved someone before.
I want a boyfriend i can run to with tears running down my face and the first thing he says is "ok, babe, whose butt am i kicking?"
--Advice--
Dont ask for a kiss, take one.
*If you were thinking about someone
while reading this,
you're definitely in Love.
_________________________jokes_________________________
>Pick the month you were born:
>January------I kicked
>February-----I loved
>March---------I smoked
>April-----------I humped
>May-----------I choked on
>June----------I murdered
>July-----------I chicken danced
>August-------I ate
>September---I danced with
>October------I sang to
>November----I yelled at
>December----I slept on
>Pick the day (number) you were born on:
>1-------a birdbath
>2-------a monster
>3-------a phone
>4-------a spoon
>5-------a Mexican
>6-------a gangster
>7-------my cell phone
>8-------my dog
>9-------my brother
>10-------my neighbor
>11-------my ugliest teacher
>12-------a banana
>13---- ---a fireman
>14-------a stuffed animal
>15-------a pig
>16-------a pickle
>17-------your mom
>18---- ---a book
>19-------myself
>20-------a baseball bat
>21-------a ninja
>22-------johnny depp (he's sexy)
>23-------a noodle
>24-------a ham
>25-------a football player
>26-------my sister
>27-------my pet hamster
>28-------an ipod
>29-------a permanent marker
>30-------a llama
>31-------A homeless guy
>Pick the color of shirt you are wearing:
>White--------because I'm fly like that
>Black---------because that's how I roll.
>Pink----------because I'm a homosexual.
>Red----------because the voices told me to.
>Blue----------because I'm sexy and I do what I want
>Green---------because I hate myself.
>Purple--------because I'm a banana.
>Gray----------because I was drunk
>Yellow--------because someone offered me 1,000,000,000,000,000,000 dollars
>Orange-------because I ate my family.
>Brown--------because I was high.
>Other---------because I'm a ninja.
>None----------because I can control myself
my real one: i murdered a stuffed animal because i was drunk
my fake ones: i choked on a ninja because the voices told me to
i humped a pickle because i am a ninja
i chicken danced with a birdbath because i am sexy and i do what i want
30 things to do at Wal-Mart
1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.
2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.
4. Start playing Calvin ball; see how many people you can get to join in.
5. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.
6. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift-wrap.
7. Pee in the sink and see if anyone notices
8. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.
9. When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially down thin narrow aisles.
10. Make farting noises as you pass a group of people and blame it on them
11. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volume up to 10!
12. Steal an item from someone’s cart while their looking, see what happens
13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!" etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment.
14. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field.
15. Put M&M's on layaway.
16. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas. 22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows form bed and bath.
17. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, "...I'm Batman. Come, Robin- -to the Bat cave!" 26. TP as much of the store as possible.
18. When some one asks you if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"
19. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, "Red Rover!"
20. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hire employees if there are any in stock, i.e., "Do you have any Shnerples here?"
21. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full-scale battlefield with G.I. Joe vs. the X-Men.
22. Take bets on the battle described above.
23. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible.
24. Hold indoor shopping cart races.
25. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?"
26. When some one-steps away from their cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.
27. Relax in the pation furniture until you get kicked out.
28. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream, “No, no!" It's those voices again!"
29. Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time.
30. Drag a lounge chair over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.
THINGS TO DO IN AN ELEVATOR
1) When there’s only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn’t you.
2) Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
3) Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.
4) Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor your on.
5) Hold the doors open and say your waiting for a friend. After a while, let the doors close, and say, “Hi Chinel. How’s your day been?”
6) Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, “That’s mine!”
7) Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator while saying work it girl! And telling them to pose.
8)Move your desk into the elevator and whenever anyone gets on, ask if they have an apointment
9) Lay down the twister mat and ask people if they would like to play.
10) Leave a box in the cornerwith a wind up clock in it, and when someone gets on, ask them if they can hear ticking.
11) Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
12) Ask, “Did you feel that?”
13) Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally.
14) When the doors close, announce to the others, “It’s okay, don’t panic, they open again!”
15) Swat at flies that don’t exist.
16) Tell people that you can see their aura.
17) Call out, “Group Hug!” and then enforce it.
18) Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, “Shut up, all of you, just shut up!”
19) Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, “Got enough air in there?”
20) Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off
21) Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, “Your one of THEM!” and back away slowly.
22) Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the other passengers
23) Listen to the elevator walls with your stethoscope.
24) Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
25) Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, “I have new socks on”.
26) Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers, “This is MY personal space”
20 Ways To Annoy A Public Bathroom Stall mate
1. Stick your open palm under the stall wall and ask your neighbor, 'May I borrow a highlighter?'
2. Say, 'Uh oh, I knew I shouldn't have put my lips on that.'
3. Cheer and clap loudly every time somebody breaks the silence with a bodily function noise.
4. Say, 'Damn, this water's cold.'
5. Drop a marble and say, 'Oh shit! My glass eye!'
6. Say, 'Hmmm, I've never seen that color before.'
7. Grunt and strain real loud for 30 seconds and then drop a cantaloupe into the toilet bowl from a height of 6 feet. Sigh relaxingly.
8. Say, 'Now how did that get there?'
9. Say, 'Humus. Reminds me of humus.'
10. Fill up a large flask with Mountain Dew. Squirt it erratically under the stall walls of your neighbors while yelling, 'Whoa! Easy boy!'
11. Say, 'Interesting. More floaters than sinkers.'
12. Using a small squeeze tube spread peanut butter on a wad of toilet paper and drops the wad under the stall wall of your neighbor. Then say, 'Whoops, could you kick that back over here please?'
13. Say, 'C'mon Mr. Happy! Don't fall asleep on Me.'
14. Fill a balloon with creamed corn. Rush into the stall with your hand over your mouth and let out a lengthy vomit impression while you squeeze the balloon and splatter cream corn all about. Apologize profusely and blame it on the fettuccine alfredo you had for breakfast.
15. Say, 'Boy, that sure looks like a maggot.
16. Say, 'Damn, I knew that drain hole was a little too small. Now what am I gonna do?'
17. Play a well-known drum cadence over and over again on your butt cheeks.
18. Before you unroll toilet paper, conspicuously lay down your 'Cross-Dressers Anonymous' newsletter on the floor visible to the adjacent stall.
19. Lower a small mirror underneath the stall wall, adjust it so you can see your neighbor and say, 'Peek-a-boo!'
20. Drop a D-cup bra on the floor under the stall wall and sing 'Born Free'.
"Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes.
That way, when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them.
And you have their shoes."
Kid and a Cop
a city cop was on his horse waiting to cross the street when a little girl stopped beside him on her new shiny bike.
“Nice bike” the cop said “did Santa bring it to you?”
“Yep,” the little girl said, “he sure did!”
The cop looked the bike over and handed the girl a $20 ticket for a safety violation, saying “Next year tell Santa to put a reflector on the back of it.”
The young girl looked up at the cop and said, “Nice horse you got there sir, did Santa bring it to you?”
“Yes, he sure did,” chuckled the cop.
The little girl looked up at the cop and said, “Next year tell Santa the d!ck goes underneath the horse, not on top.”
____________________________________
TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America .
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?
CLASS: Maria.
____________________________________
TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
__________________________________________
TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
____________________________________________
TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.
__________________________________
TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!
__________________________________________
TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
_______________________________________
TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ' I. '
MILLIE: I is..
TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am.'
MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'
________________________________
TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.
______________________________________
TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
______________________________
TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE : No, sir. It's the same dog.
___________________________________
TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher
*~*~*~*~ LMFAO*~*~*~*~
She Was Soooooooooooooo Blonde:
· -she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
· -she sent me a fax with a stamp on it.
· -she thought a quarterback was a refund.
· -she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order.
· -she thought Boyz II Men was a day care center.
She Was Soooooooooooooo Blonde:
· -she thought Eartha Kitt was a set of garden tools.
· -she thought General Motors was in the army.
· -she thought Meow Mix was a CD for cats.
· -she thought TuPac Shakur was a Jewish holiday.
· -under "education" on her job application, she put
"Hooked On Phonics."
She Was Soooooooooooooo Blonde:
· -she tripped over a cordless phone.
· -she spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice can
because it said "concentrate."
· -she told me to meet her at the corner of "WALK" and
"DON'T WALK."
· -at the bottom of the application where it says "sign
here," she put "Sagittarius."
· -she asked for a price check at the Dollar Store.
She Was Soooooooooooooo Blonde:
· -she studied for a blood test.
· -she thought she needed a token to get on Soul Train
· -she sold the car for gas money!
· -when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 bus twice
instead.
· -when she went to the airport and saw a sign that said
"Airport Left," she turned around and went home.
She Was Soooooooooooooo Blonde:
· -when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved.
· -she thinks Taco Bell is the Mexican phone company.
· -if she spoke her mind, she'd be speechless.
· -she thought that she could not use her AM radio in the evening.
· -she had a shirt that said "TGIF ," which she thought stood for "Tits Go In Front."
· -she thought Grape Nuts was a venereal disease
This is Bob..
Bob likes you..
Bob also likes sharp things..
I suggest you run from Bob...
Blonde Car Accident
One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.
The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.
He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.
Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.
The blonde started laughing.
This made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.
This time the blonde laughed even harder.
Livid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.
The blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.
The blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"
You're a great friend but if zombies chase us...I'm tripping you.
It is better to look stupid and keep your mouth shut than to open it and prove it.
Some of the funniest things I have ever heard.
"No! I won't go to hell! I've got a restraing order."
"I GOT STUPID VISION!"
"Do not make me throw a possum at your face."
"If you read this...you're finished reading."
"It'll be funnier than a penguin playing a banjo."
"He said: I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it. She said: You wear pants, don't you?"
"I don't need to 'get a life'. I'm a gamer. I have lots of lives."
"I'll kill him. I'll kill him dead. Like with a rock...or something."
"If I wake up with marker on my face...I'll stab you!"
"Bring out ur inner ninja."
"No, as a matter of fact, you did not do my mom last night. Thanks."
"Every time I go to the doctors, I get a jacket. A straight one. it makes me feel special because I get to hug myself."
"I'll try to be nicer if you try to be smarter."
"I've got A.D.D. and magic markers. Oh the thrills I will have."
"Hi. I'll eat you if you make me mad."
"The greener grass on the other side is probably artificial turf."
"I am a loud man with a very large hat! This means I am in charge!"
"You are hot, sexy, and nice. Oops, sorry, wrong person."
"I dreamt of you last night... you were screaming and you had a toothpick in your eye."
Dont follow in my footsteps
I run into walls.
I may have a thing for walls
put this on your page if this is true!!! lol
________________________percentages_______________________
92% of American teens today would die if Abercrombie & Fitch said it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. If you're part of the 8% that would be laughing their asses off, put this in your profile...
95% of people would cry if Miley Cyrus was on the edge of a skyscraper. Post this on your page if you are one of the 5%that would be screaming, "JUMP! JUMP, BITCH, JUMP!!!"
*98% of teenagers have tried pot. If you are one of the 2% who hasn't, post this into your message*
**Support Gay Rights**
Put this up if you support gay rights
**Love is Love**
_____________________beliefs_____________________
I'm BLACK, so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch
I'm an ATHEIST, so I MUST hate the world.
I DON'T HAVE A RELIGION, so I MUST not have morals.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be gay.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm PACIFIC ISLANDER, so I MUST be lazy.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love kool-aid and fried chicken.
I don't FLIRT WITH GUYS AT SCHOOL so I MUST be gay.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I'm POSTING THIS so I MUST be a groupie.
~*Post this in your profile if you think stereotyping is just plain wrong*~
RACISM IS WRONG!!!
*A black woman walks into a resturaunt and orders some food. The waitress, who is white, refuses to serve her, saying she is colored. The woman looked at her and said:
When I was born, I was black.
When I grow up, I'm black.
When I go into the sun, I'm black.
When I'm cold, I'm black.
When I'm scared, I'm black.
When I get sick I'm black.
When I die, I'm still black.
But you,
When you were born, you wre pink.
When you grow up, you're white.
When you go in the sun, you're red.
When your cold, you're blue.
When your scared, you're yellow.
When you get sick, you're green.
And, when you die, you're gray.
And you're calling me colored??
________________________abuse______________________
She Was Only 5..this is sad!
Body: Her dad was a drunk
Her mom was an addict
Her parents kept her
Locked in an attic
Her only friend
was a little toy bear
It was old and worn out
And had patches of hair
She always talked to it
When no one's around
She lays there and hugs it
Not a peep of sound
Until her parents
unlock the door
Some more and more pain
She'll have to endure
A bruise on her leg
A scar on her face
Why would she be
In such a horrible place?
But she grabs her bear
And softly cries
She loves her parents
But they want her to die
She sits in the corner
Quiet but thinking,
"Please God, why is
My life always sinking? "
Such a bad life
For a sad little kid
She'd get beaten and beaten
For anything she did
Then one night
Her mom came home high
And the poor child was beaten
As hours went by
Then her mom suddenly
Grabbed for a blade
It was sharp and pointy
One that she made
She thrusted the blade
Right in her chest,
"You deserve to die
You worthless piece of
!
The mom walked out
Leaving the girl slowly dying
She grabbed her bear
And again started crying
Police showed up
At the small little house
Then quickly barged in
Everything quiet as a mouse
One officer slowly
Opened a door
To find the little girl
Lying dead on the floor
It must have been bad
To go through so much harm
But at least she died
With her best friend in her arms
A child dies every day from child abuse.
And if you have an ounce of pity in you for Aurora
(the little girl), and you hate child abuse with a passion,
you will repost this and help out those abused children,
and let them know that someone cares for them.
It doesn't take that long only about 10 seconds
so please just do it.
SKIP THIS IF YOU HATE SAD STORIES!
'Jessy you love me don't you' a smile; his
Their breathe spirts weep
'Daddy you know i do; what is it?'
He smiles at his friend; his hand creeps
His friend takes my hand; looks me in the eyes
Daddy's creeping up my nightie; cold hands
I try to pull his hand away; grip is strong!
They look at one another; nod; something planned
I feel my palms sweat; Daddy's under my knickers
'Daddy I'm going to bed! Night' Pulling again
But there grip is to strong for weak me
I look at both; and ask, who are these men?
His fingers going up me; pulling away
His friend leans forward; a kiss? Why?
His tongue moving mine; my eyes squint
Lean back and away; 'Why are you doing this?'
No answer, i feel the pain inside me; him
Chucks the quilt on the floor; me to
I try and scamper away, but I'm not fast
'O Daddy please, i love you'
His friend; pulling at my nightie
And my Dad pulling my pants down
His friend pinning my hands to the floor
As my Dad lies himself on the ground
I squirm; as Daddy friend pulls me up
And places me on top of Daddy; thrusts within
I cry; i bite; i scratch; i slap; i fail
'O Daddy please you win you win!'
I can feel my skin rip; my virginity breaking free
I can feel the blood seep down my leg
'Daddy your hurting me please'
I plead to him and his friend; not even a beg
Daddy's laughing; why does he laugh?
His friend shoves himself in my mouth and moans
Tying my hands together; moving in and out
'Ride me Jessy' He laughs and groans
They smile at one another; laugh to
They roll me over and spread me wide well
My daddy sits on my face; himself in again
While his friend talks and pushes himself inside
I can hardly breathe; i gag for air
I cough and splutter; cry and weep
I beg and plead; but its no use
They've already made me hurt and bleed
I stare into his eyes; that look upon me
This is not my Dad; where is he?
If he was still here; would he care
Would he actually even; see?
Finally they get of and lie me on the sofa
My cheeks blotchy from tears and pain
They play with themselves; all over me
Rub it in; making me feel the shame
'Why Daddy? Please tell me why?'
Dad looks at his friend; and waves him away
'Jessy i love you' he smiles and kisses my cheek
'Is that all you have in your heart to say?'
He puts my nightie on me
I walks me to my bedroom door
Ever since that night; His friend
And himself every Friday come back for more
'Night sweet Girl; You are my life'
Closing the door, tears still down my face
Still the smell of him and his friend
Fade into me like disgrace
I watch the Moon go down; the sun come up
'Jessy its school' Knocking at my door
I cant help but cry; weep in pain
Because I'm so scared he wanted more
But one night daddy took it too far
Daddy and his friend came back for one last shot
They were worried they would get caught
So he and his friend took me to a cemetery lot
I was blindfolded and my hands were tied back
'Daddy please!! Not tonight!'
Daddy and his friend both had their last fun
After that i tried to put up a fight
I begged daddy 'Please no more!'
All he could say 'Shut up you stupid whore!'
Daddy unblindfolded me at last
He said I love you so much
He went back into the car and pulled out a bat
'Daddy I swear I wont say a thing!!!!'
I was dead
After only one swing..........................
RAPE IS SOO WRONG! POST IF YOU AGREE!
My name is Sarah I am but three, My eyes are swollen I cannot see, I must be stupid I must be bad, What else could have made My daddy so mad? I wish I were better I wish I weren't ugly, Then maybe my mommy Would still want to hug me. I can't speak at all I can't do a wrong Or else I'm locked up All the day long When I awake I'm all alone The house is dark My folks aren't home. When my mommy does come I'll try and be nice, So maybe I'll get just One whipping tonight Don't make a sound! I just heard a car My daddy is back From Charlie's Bar. I hear him curse My name he calls I press myself Against the wall. I try and hide From his evil eyes I'm so afraid now I'm starting to cry. He finds me weeping He shouts ugly words, He says its my fault That he suffers at work. He slaps me and hits me And yells at me more,I finally get free And I run for the door. He's already locked it And I start to bawl, He takes me and throws me Against the hard wall. I fall to the floor With my bones nearly broken, And my daddy continues With more bad words spoken. "I'm sorry!", I scream But its now much too late His face has been twisted Into unimaginable hate. The hurt and the pain Again and again Oh please God, have mercy! Oh please let it end! And he finally stops And heads for the door, While I lay there motionless Sprawled on the floor. My name is Sarah And I am but three, Tonight my daddy Murdered me.
please, add this to your page, so to help stop child abuse! thanks
i am about to admit something very huge...
i have an addiction...
and it is impossible to stop...
my addiction is...................................................................................................... ........................................................................................................
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...................................................................... CAKE!
My name is Alaura and i am a cake addict
! I am president of CEA aka Cake Eaters Anonymous
! If you are also an addict, contact me and i will give you the recipe to the best cake ever! 
A PRAYER TO THE CAKE GODS
cake is good
cake is great
cake is who
cake is what
cake is when
cake is where
cake is why
cake is cake
(repeat as much as you want and you will be rewarded with cake!
)
*cricket chirps*
...yeah. Here's my page.
*like a robot* press the big red button
http://www.toysforyourblog.com/games/bigred/
http://www.toxin.org/cgi-bin/hugs.cgi
give me hugs here!!!
take a quiz to see if you know me at all! hehe.. i'll bet that you don't get any higher than 60%!
http://www.quizyourfriends.com/take-quiz.php?id=0907021919497826&a=1&
_________________________about me__________________________
my name is Alaura (aka Lola) and I live in California. I was born in Colorado and then lived in Nevada before finally settling here. my parents are seperated and have been so for over ten years. i am in highschool and single. i am in between beliefs religiously but i know what i want in life. i am bisexual but i don't mind being single. all i really know is that i am hungry.
_________________________My AP family________________________
My AP fam is:
Bros- Uthremdetiago
lowercase prelude
Aquario.N.Solaris
Sisterz-ChocolateLoverGirl
Erozay
DarkestNoon
Shadow Love
Fraternal twin- Chocolate Dime
mom- noir mariposa...x
uncle- wander of the sky
aunt- Reptile Lady
cousin- Sky Princess
Niece- xX Mita Xx
InsanityDies
pet- princess of my love
Friends-too many to name
____________________Other things about me__________________
Place an X by all the things you've done, or remove the X from the ones you have not, and send it to all of your friends (including me). This is for your entire life!
( ) Smoked a cigarette
( ) Drank so much you threw up
(x) Had feelings for someone who didn't have them back
( ) Been arrested
( ) Gone on a blind date
( ) Skipped school
( ) Seen someone die
( ) Been to Canada
( ) Been to Florida
( ) Been to Mexico
(X) Been on a plane
(X) Been lost
( x) Been on the opposite side of the country
(x ) Gone to Washington , DC
(X) Swam in the ocean
(X) Felt like dying....
(X) Cried yourself to sleep
(X) Played cops and robbers
(X) Recently colored with crayons
(X) Sang karaoke badly
( ) paid for a meal with only coins
(X) Done something you told yourself you wouldn't
(X) Made prank phone calls
(X) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose
( ) Laughed until liquid came out of the other end
(X) Caught a snowflake on your tongue.
(X) Danced in the rain
(X) Written a letter to Santa Claus
( ) Been kissed under the mistletoe
(X) Watched the sun rise with someone you care about
(X) Blown bubbles
( ) Made a bonfire on the beach
( ) Crashed a party
(X) Gone roller-skating
(x ) Ice-skating
001. Real name → alaura
002. Nickname(s)→ lola, lo, lola bella, bella, princess snooters
003. Status → single
005. Male or Female → female
006. Elementary → patterson
007. Middle School → patterson
008. High School → patterson
009. College → i havn't gone to college yet
010. Hair color → light brown
011. Long or short → short
012. Loud or Quiet → depends
013. Sweats or Jeans → both
014. Phone or Camera → Camera phone
015. Health freak → no
017. Do you have a crush on someone? → no
018. Eat or Drink → both.
019. Piercings → ear
020. Tattoos → not yet
FIRSTS:
023. First piercing → ear.
024. First best friend → amy
025. First Award → attendence
026. First crush → forgot
027. First pet → dog named teo
028. First big vacation → hawaii
030. First big birthday → i dunno
CURRENTLY:
049. Eating → nothing.
050. Drinking → nothing
052. I'm about to → read a book
053. Listening to → nothing
054. Plans for today → read, eat, sleep
055. Waiting on → a boyfriend
OUR FUTURE:
058. Want kids? → 2 thats it
059. Want to get married? → ya to a nice guy
060. Careers in mind → teacher, author
WHICH IS BETTER WITH GUYS?
068. Hair or eyes → both
070. Shorter or taller? → taller
072. Romantic or spontaneous → both
073. Nice stomach or nice arms → both
074. Sensitive or loud → sensitive
075. Hook-up or relationship → Relationship.
077. Trouble maker or hesitant → hesitant
HAVE YOU EVER:
080. Lost glasses/contacts? no, but i have glasses
081. Run away from home → no, no reason to yet
082. Held a gun/knife for self defense → ya, against my asshole neighbor.
083. Killed somebody → nope
084. Broken someone's heart → as far as i no, no
085. Been arrested → never and dont plan on it
087. Cried when someone died → no
DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
089. Yourself → mostly
090. Miracles → definatly
091. Love at first sight → definatly
092. Heaven → i don't know anymore
093. Santa Claus → duh no
094. Sex on the first date → no no no no and NO
095. Kiss on the first date → if it's a good date, yes, most definitely
ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:
097. Is there one person you want to be with right now → no
098. Are you seriously happy with where you are in life → no
099. Do you believe in God → most of the time
100. Are you gay/bisexual → bi
________________________songs_______________________
FIREFLIES
You would not believe your eyes
If ten million fireflies
Lit up the world as I fell asleep
Cause they fill the open air
And leave teardrops everywhere
You'd think me rude, but I
Would just stand and stare.
I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns slowly.
It's hard to say that I'd
Rather stay awake when I'm asleep,
Cause everything is never as it seems.
Cause I'd get a thousand hugs
From ten thousand lightening bugs
As they tried to teach me how to dance.
A foxtrot above my head,
A sock-hop beneath my bed,
The disco ball is just hanging by a thread.
I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns slowly.
It's hard to say that I'd
Rather stay awake when I'm asleep,
Cause everything is never as it seems.
(When I fall asleep.)
Leave my door open just a crack.
(Please take me away from here.)
Cause I feel like such an insomniac.
(Please take me away from here.)
Why do I tire of counting sheep?
(Please take me away from here.)
When I'm far too tired to fall asleep
To ten million fireflies.
I'm weird, cause I hate goodbyes
I got misty eyes as they said farewell.
But I'll know where several are
If my dreams get real bizarre
Cause I saved a few,
And I keep them in a jar.
I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns slowly.
It's hard to say that I'd
Rather stay awake when I'm asleep,
Cause everything is never as it seems.
(When I fall asleep.)
I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns slowly.
It's hard to say that I'd
Rather stay awake when I'm asleep
Because my dreams are bursting at the seams
a poem from one of my contests
A TWISTED FAIRYTALE by CROWD
Once upon a time, there were seven green girls named Alaura.
They loved to eat vegetarian fish while reading Harry Plum, or Stephanie Potter the bounty hunter.
They also enjoyed watching The Pirates Of Anastasia, and Caribbean Potter The Egyptian Prince Of Star Wars.
They love to do most work.
And they love to moon cats with sleeping dogs babies.
They're not religious, but do believe that God made macaroni and cheese with tuna.
So anyway, when the wolf tried to blow down the girls houses, he fell off the beanstalk,
Which caused him to break his glass slipper.
And his porridge was so hot that he gave it to an old lady living in a shoe.
There were seven dwarfs that were in love with the seven green sisters.
But the girls had already given they're love to the Keebler Elves.
So the girls made it home by midnight, as they're carriage turned into a pumpkin pie.
And Thing 1 and Thing 2 cleaned up the mess that the Oompa Loompas made.
Just then Papa Bear came home, and pulled a thorn out of Briar Rabbit's foot.
He then broke a chair over three beds because Goldie locked him out.
Then he kissed a frog while listening to Prince.
And partied like it was 1999 Red Balloons.
And lived happily ever napster...
_________________________cool pics____________________
......... . - . - , _ , .......
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|………..| Put this on your
|………..| page if you have
|…….O.| ever pushed a
|………..| door that said pull!
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(\ /)
( . .)
c(''') (''')
If you'd like to help this bunny with world domination,
please paste him on your Page
/\_/\
(^=.=^)
||_||)/
Copy and paste this kitty for cat power!
Feline Furosiousness! MEOW!
(\ /)
(O.o)
(>" >)
/_|_\ This is Mr. Bunny. Please paste him to your page to help him with his mission to DOMINATE the world!!!
(¯`v´¯)
`*.¸.*´
¸.•´¸.•*¨) ¸.•*¨)
(¸.•´ (¸.•´ .•´ ¸¸.•¨¯`•.
¸.•´¸.•*¨) ¸.•*¨)
(¸.•´ (¸.•´ .•´ ¸¸.•¨¯`•.
________________________ love ________________________
A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty,
He said..no.
She asked him if he would want to be with her forever...and he said no.
She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry,and once again he replied with a no.
She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and
said...
You're not pretty you're beautiful.
I don't want to be with you forever, I NEED to be with you forever.
And I wouldn't cry if you walked away...I'd die.
He gave her 12 roses.11 real and 1 fake and said "I'll love you untill the last one dies."

♀ + ♂ = ♥
♀ + ♀ = ♥
♂ + ♂ = ♥
Love is love
♥Girl: Do I Ever Cross Your Mind?
♥Boy: No
♥Girl: Do You Like Me?
♥Boy: Not Really.
♥Girl: Do You Want Me?
♥Boy: No.
♥Girl: Would You Cry If I Left?
♥Boy: No.
♥Girl: Would You Live For Me?
♥Boy: No.
♥Girl: Would You Do Anything For Me?
♥Boy: No.
♥Girl: Choose- Me Or Your Life.
♥Boy: My Life.
♥The Girl Runs Away In Shock And Pain And The Boy Runs After Her And Says:
♥The Reason You Never Cross My Mind Is Because Your Always On My Mind
♥The Reason I Dont Like You Is Because I Love You
♥The Reason I Dont Want You Is Because I Need You
♥The Reason I Wouldnt Cry If You Left Is Because I Would Die If You Left
♥The Reason I Wouldnt Live For You Is Because I Would Die For You
♥The Reason Im Not Willing To Do Anything For You Is Because I Would Do Everything For You
♥The Reason I Choose My Life Is Because You Are My Life!♥
Cinderella walked on broken glass
Sleeping beauty let a whole lifetime pass
Belle fell in love with a hideous beast
Jasmine married a common thief
Ariel walked on land for love & life
Snow white barely escaped the knife
it was all about blood, sweat, & tears
because love means facing your
BIGGEST FEARS
WHEN I RUN AWAY FROM YOU
- CHASE ME
WHEN I POUT MY LIPS
- KISS ME
WHEN I KICK & PUNCH
- HOLD ME TIGHT
WHEN I CALL YOU A LOSER
- JUST KNOW THAT YOUR MY LOSER
WHEN I AM SILENT
- IM THINKIN OF HOW TO SAY I LOVE YOU
WHEN I IGNORE YOU
- I WANT ALL YOUR ATTENTION
WHEN I PULL AWAY
- GRAB ME BY THE WAIST AND NEVER LET GO
WHEN YOU SEE ME AT MY WORST
- TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL
WHEN I SCREAM AT YOU
- TELL ME YOU LOVE ME AND MEAN IT
WHEN YOU SEE ME WALKING
-SNEAK UP BEHIND ME GRAB ME BY THE WAIST AND GIVE ME A KISS
IF I DONT CALL YOU
- IM WANTING YOU TO CALL ME
WHEN IM SCARED
-HOLD ME AND TELL ME EVERYTHING WILL BE OK CAUSE I'M WITH YOU
WHEN I LOOK LIKE SOMETHINGS THE MATTER
- KISS ME AND TELL ME NOT TO WORRY
WHILE I HOLD YOUR HANDS
- PLAY WITH MY FINGERS
*A girl and guy were speeding, on a motorcycle, over 90 mph on the road..
Girl: Slow down. I’m scared.
Guy: No, this is fun.
Girl: No, it’s not. Please, it’s too scary!
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: Fine, I love you. Slow down!
Guy: Now give me a BIG hug.
*Girl hugs him*
Guy: Can you take my helmet off & put it on yourself? It’s bugging me.
(In the paper the next day)
A motorcycle crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it, but only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized that his breaks broke, but he didn’t want to let the girl know. Instead, he had her say she loved him & felt her hug one last time, then had her wear his helmet so that she would live even though it meant that he would die.
If you would ever do this for someone....then post this on your page asap!!
Girl Facts:
When a girl bumps into your arm while walking with you she wants you to hold her hand
When she wants a hug she will just stand there
When u break a girls heart she still feels it when u run into each other 3 years later
When a girl is quiet, millions of things are running through her mind
When a girl is not arguing, she is thinking deeply
When a girl looks at you with eyes full of questions, she is wondering how long you will be around
When a girl answers, "I'm fine," after a few seconds, she is not at all fine
When a girl stares at you, she is wondering why you are playing games
When a girl lays her head on your chest, she is wishing for you to be hers forever
When a girl says she can't live without you, she has made up her mind that you are her future
When a girl says, "I miss you," no one in this world can miss you more than that
When a girl is mean to you after a break-up she wants you back, but shes scared she'll get hurt and knows you're gone forever
Guy Facts:
When a guy calls you, he wants to be with you
When a guy is quiet, He's listening to you...
When a guy is not arguing, He realizes he's wrong
When a guy says, "I'm fine." after a few minutes he means it
When a guy stares at you, he wishes you would care about him and wonders if you do
When your laying your head on a guy's chest, he has the world
When a guy calls/texts/comments you everyday, he is in love
When a (good) guy tells you he loves you, he means it
When a guy says he can't live without you, he's with you til you're done
When a guy says, "I miss you," he misses you more than you could have ever missed him or anything else
What A Kiss Means
Kiss on the stomach-----"I love you"
Kiss on the Forehead ----"I hope we're together forever"
Kiss on the Ear ---"I'm corny"
Kiss on the Cheek ---"We're friends"
Kiss on the Hand ---"I adore you"
Kiss on the Neck ---"We belong together"
Kiss on the Shoulder ---"I want you"
Kiss on the Lips ---"I love you" OR "I want you"
What the gesture means...
Holding Hands ---"We definitely love each other"
Slap on the Butt ---"That's mine"
Holding on tight ---"I don't want to let go"
Looking into each other's Eyes ---"I just plain love you"
Playing with Hair ---"Tell me you love me"
Arms around the Waist ---"I love you too much to let go"
Laughing while Kissing ---"I am completely Comfortable with you"
Every girl dreams that one day she will find a boy that does these things for her. even the smallest action can have the BIGGEST impact in someones life.
• leave her cute text notes.
• kiss her in front of your friends.
• trust her over everyone else.
• tell her she looks beautiful.
• look into her eyes when you talk to her.
• let her mess with your hair.
• touch her hair.
• just walk around with her.
• forgive her for her mistakes.
• look at her like she`s the only girl you see.
• hold her hand when you`re around your friends.
• when she starts swearing at you, tell her you love her.
• let her fall asleep in your arms.
• get her mad, then kiss her.
• tease her and let her tease you back.
• stay up all night with her when she`s sick.
• watch her favorite movie with her.
• kiss her forehead.
• write her letters.
• when she`s sad, hang out with her.
• let her know she`s important.
• let her take all the photos she wants of you.
• kiss her in the pouring rain.
• when you fall in love with her, tell her,and when you tell her, love her like you`ve never loved someone before.
I want a boyfriend i can run to with tears running down my face and the first thing he says is "ok, babe, whose butt am i kicking?"
--Advice--
Dont ask for a kiss, take one.
*If you were thinking about someone
while reading this,
you're definitely in Love.
_________________________jokes_________________________
>Pick the month you were born:
>January------I kicked
>February-----I loved
>March---------I smoked
>April-----------I humped
>May-----------I choked on
>June----------I murdered
>July-----------I chicken danced
>August-------I ate
>September---I danced with
>October------I sang to
>November----I yelled at
>December----I slept on
>Pick the day (number) you were born on:
>1-------a birdbath
>2-------a monster
>3-------a phone
>4-------a spoon
>5-------a Mexican
>6-------a gangster
>7-------my cell phone
>8-------my dog
>9-------my brother
>10-------my neighbor
>11-------my ugliest teacher
>12-------a banana
>13---- ---a fireman
>14-------a stuffed animal
>15-------a pig
>16-------a pickle
>17-------your mom
>18---- ---a book
>19-------myself
>20-------a baseball bat
>21-------a ninja
>22-------johnny depp (he's sexy)
>23-------a noodle
>24-------a ham
>25-------a football player
>26-------my sister
>27-------my pet hamster
>28-------an ipod
>29-------a permanent marker
>30-------a llama
>31-------A homeless guy
>Pick the color of shirt you are wearing:
>White--------because I'm fly like that
>Black---------because that's how I roll.
>Pink----------because I'm a homosexual.
>Red----------because the voices told me to.
>Blue----------because I'm sexy and I do what I want
>Green---------because I hate myself.
>Purple--------because I'm a banana.
>Gray----------because I was drunk
>Yellow--------because someone offered me 1,000,000,000,000,000,000 dollars
>Orange-------because I ate my family.
>Brown--------because I was high.
>Other---------because I'm a ninja.
>None----------because I can control myself
my real one: i murdered a stuffed animal because i was drunk
my fake ones: i choked on a ninja because the voices told me to
i humped a pickle because i am a ninja
i chicken danced with a birdbath because i am sexy and i do what i want
30 things to do at Wal-Mart
1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.
2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.
4. Start playing Calvin ball; see how many people you can get to join in.
5. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.
6. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift-wrap.
7. Pee in the sink and see if anyone notices
8. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.
9. When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially down thin narrow aisles.
10. Make farting noises as you pass a group of people and blame it on them
11. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volume up to 10!
12. Steal an item from someone’s cart while their looking, see what happens
13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!" etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment.
14. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field.
15. Put M&M's on layaway.
16. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas. 22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows form bed and bath.
17. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, "...I'm Batman. Come, Robin- -to the Bat cave!" 26. TP as much of the store as possible.
18. When some one asks you if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"
19. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, "Red Rover!"
20. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hire employees if there are any in stock, i.e., "Do you have any Shnerples here?"
21. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full-scale battlefield with G.I. Joe vs. the X-Men.
22. Take bets on the battle described above.
23. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible.
24. Hold indoor shopping cart races.
25. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?"
26. When some one-steps away from their cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.
27. Relax in the pation furniture until you get kicked out.
28. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream, “No, no!" It's those voices again!"
29. Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time.
30. Drag a lounge chair over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.
THINGS TO DO IN AN ELEVATOR
1) When there’s only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn’t you.
2) Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
3) Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.
4) Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor your on.
5) Hold the doors open and say your waiting for a friend. After a while, let the doors close, and say, “Hi Chinel. How’s your day been?”
6) Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, “That’s mine!”
7) Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator while saying work it girl! And telling them to pose.
8)Move your desk into the elevator and whenever anyone gets on, ask if they have an apointment
9) Lay down the twister mat and ask people if they would like to play.
10) Leave a box in the cornerwith a wind up clock in it, and when someone gets on, ask them if they can hear ticking.
11) Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
12) Ask, “Did you feel that?”
13) Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally.
14) When the doors close, announce to the others, “It’s okay, don’t panic, they open again!”
15) Swat at flies that don’t exist.
16) Tell people that you can see their aura.
17) Call out, “Group Hug!” and then enforce it.
18) Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, “Shut up, all of you, just shut up!”
19) Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, “Got enough air in there?”
20) Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off
21) Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, “Your one of THEM!” and back away slowly.
22) Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the other passengers
23) Listen to the elevator walls with your stethoscope.
24) Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
25) Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, “I have new socks on”.
26) Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers, “This is MY personal space”
20 Ways To Annoy A Public Bathroom Stall mate
1. Stick your open palm under the stall wall and ask your neighbor, 'May I borrow a highlighter?'
2. Say, 'Uh oh, I knew I shouldn't have put my lips on that.'
3. Cheer and clap loudly every time somebody breaks the silence with a bodily function noise.
4. Say, 'Damn, this water's cold.'
5. Drop a marble and say, 'Oh shit! My glass eye!'
6. Say, 'Hmmm, I've never seen that color before.'
7. Grunt and strain real loud for 30 seconds and then drop a cantaloupe into the toilet bowl from a height of 6 feet. Sigh relaxingly.
8. Say, 'Now how did that get there?'
9. Say, 'Humus. Reminds me of humus.'
10. Fill up a large flask with Mountain Dew. Squirt it erratically under the stall walls of your neighbors while yelling, 'Whoa! Easy boy!'
11. Say, 'Interesting. More floaters than sinkers.'
12. Using a small squeeze tube spread peanut butter on a wad of toilet paper and drops the wad under the stall wall of your neighbor. Then say, 'Whoops, could you kick that back over here please?'
13. Say, 'C'mon Mr. Happy! Don't fall asleep on Me.'
14. Fill a balloon with creamed corn. Rush into the stall with your hand over your mouth and let out a lengthy vomit impression while you squeeze the balloon and splatter cream corn all about. Apologize profusely and blame it on the fettuccine alfredo you had for breakfast.
15. Say, 'Boy, that sure looks like a maggot.
16. Say, 'Damn, I knew that drain hole was a little too small. Now what am I gonna do?'
17. Play a well-known drum cadence over and over again on your butt cheeks.
18. Before you unroll toilet paper, conspicuously lay down your 'Cross-Dressers Anonymous' newsletter on the floor visible to the adjacent stall.
19. Lower a small mirror underneath the stall wall, adjust it so you can see your neighbor and say, 'Peek-a-boo!'
20. Drop a D-cup bra on the floor under the stall wall and sing 'Born Free'.
"Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes.
That way, when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them.
And you have their shoes."
Kid and a Cop
a city cop was on his horse waiting to cross the street when a little girl stopped beside him on her new shiny bike.
“Nice bike” the cop said “did Santa bring it to you?”
“Yep,” the little girl said, “he sure did!”
The cop looked the bike over and handed the girl a $20 ticket for a safety violation, saying “Next year tell Santa to put a reflector on the back of it.”
The young girl looked up at the cop and said, “Nice horse you got there sir, did Santa bring it to you?”
“Yes, he sure did,” chuckled the cop.
The little girl looked up at the cop and said, “Next year tell Santa the d!ck goes underneath the horse, not on top.”
____________________________________
TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America .
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?
CLASS: Maria.
____________________________________
TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
__________________________________________
TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
____________________________________________
TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.
__________________________________
TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!
__________________________________________
TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
_______________________________________
TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ' I. '
MILLIE: I is..
TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am.'
MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'
________________________________
TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.
______________________________________
TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
______________________________
TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE : No, sir. It's the same dog.
___________________________________
TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher
*~*~*~*~ LMFAO*~*~*~*~
She Was Soooooooooooooo Blonde:
· -she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
· -she sent me a fax with a stamp on it.
· -she thought a quarterback was a refund.
· -she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order.
· -she thought Boyz II Men was a day care center.
She Was Soooooooooooooo Blonde:
· -she thought Eartha Kitt was a set of garden tools.
· -she thought General Motors was in the army.
· -she thought Meow Mix was a CD for cats.
· -she thought TuPac Shakur was a Jewish holiday.
· -under "education" on her job application, she put
"Hooked On Phonics."
She Was Soooooooooooooo Blonde:
· -she tripped over a cordless phone.
· -she spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice can
because it said "concentrate."
· -she told me to meet her at the corner of "WALK" and
"DON'T WALK."
· -at the bottom of the application where it says "sign
here," she put "Sagittarius."
· -she asked for a price check at the Dollar Store.
She Was Soooooooooooooo Blonde:
· -she studied for a blood test.
· -she thought she needed a token to get on Soul Train
· -she sold the car for gas money!
· -when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 bus twice
instead.
· -when she went to the airport and saw a sign that said
"Airport Left," she turned around and went home.
She Was Soooooooooooooo Blonde:
· -when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved.
· -she thinks Taco Bell is the Mexican phone company.
· -if she spoke her mind, she'd be speechless.
· -she thought that she could not use her AM radio in the evening.
· -she had a shirt that said "TGIF ," which she thought stood for "Tits Go In Front."
· -she thought Grape Nuts was a venereal disease
This is Bob..
Bob likes you..
Bob also likes sharp things..
I suggest you run from Bob...
Blonde Car Accident
One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.
The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.
He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.
Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.
The blonde started laughing.
This made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.
This time the blonde laughed even harder.
Livid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.
The blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.
The blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"
You're a great friend but if zombies chase us...I'm tripping you.
It is better to look stupid and keep your mouth shut than to open it and prove it.
Some of the funniest things I have ever heard.
"No! I won't go to hell! I've got a restraing order."
"I GOT STUPID VISION!"
"Do not make me throw a possum at your face."
"If you read this...you're finished reading."
"It'll be funnier than a penguin playing a banjo."
"He said: I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it. She said: You wear pants, don't you?"
"I don't need to 'get a life'. I'm a gamer. I have lots of lives."
"I'll kill him. I'll kill him dead. Like with a rock...or something."
"If I wake up with marker on my face...I'll stab you!"
"Bring out ur inner ninja."
"No, as a matter of fact, you did not do my mom last night. Thanks."
"Every time I go to the doctors, I get a jacket. A straight one. it makes me feel special because I get to hug myself."
"I'll try to be nicer if you try to be smarter."
"I've got A.D.D. and magic markers. Oh the thrills I will have."
"Hi. I'll eat you if you make me mad."
"The greener grass on the other side is probably artificial turf."
"I am a loud man with a very large hat! This means I am in charge!"
"You are hot, sexy, and nice. Oops, sorry, wrong person."
"I dreamt of you last night... you were screaming and you had a toothpick in your eye."
Dont follow in my footsteps
I run into walls.
I may have a thing for walls
put this on your page if this is true!!! lol
________________________percentages_______________________
92% of American teens today would die if Abercrombie & Fitch said it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. If you're part of the 8% that would be laughing their asses off, put this in your profile...
95% of people would cry if Miley Cyrus was on the edge of a skyscraper. Post this on your page if you are one of the 5%that would be screaming, "JUMP! JUMP, BITCH, JUMP!!!"
*98% of teenagers have tried pot. If you are one of the 2% who hasn't, post this into your message*
**Support Gay Rights**
Put this up if you support gay rights
**Love is Love**
_____________________beliefs_____________________
I'm BLACK, so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch
I'm an ATHEIST, so I MUST hate the world.
I DON'T HAVE A RELIGION, so I MUST not have morals.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be gay.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm PACIFIC ISLANDER, so I MUST be lazy.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love kool-aid and fried chicken.
I don't FLIRT WITH GUYS AT SCHOOL so I MUST be gay.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I'm POSTING THIS so I MUST be a groupie.
~*Post this in your profile if you think stereotyping is just plain wrong*~
RACISM IS WRONG!!!
*A black woman walks into a resturaunt and orders some food. The waitress, who is white, refuses to serve her, saying she is colored. The woman looked at her and said:
When I was born, I was black.
When I grow up, I'm black.
When I go into the sun, I'm black.
When I'm cold, I'm black.
When I'm scared, I'm black.
When I get sick I'm black.
When I die, I'm still black.
But you,
When you were born, you wre pink.
When you grow up, you're white.
When you go in the sun, you're red.
When your cold, you're blue.
When your scared, you're yellow.
When you get sick, you're green.
And, when you die, you're gray.
And you're calling me colored??
________________________abuse______________________
She Was Only 5..this is sad!
Body: Her dad was a drunk
Her mom was an addict
Her parents kept her
Locked in an attic
Her only friend
was a little toy bear
It was old and worn out
And had patches of hair
She always talked to it
When no one's around
She lays there and hugs it
Not a peep of sound
Until her parents
unlock the door
Some more and more pain
She'll have to endure
A bruise on her leg
A scar on her face
Why would she be
In such a horrible place?
But she grabs her bear
And softly cries
She loves her parents
But they want her to die
She sits in the corner
Quiet but thinking,
"Please God, why is
My life always sinking? "
Such a bad life
For a sad little kid
She'd get beaten and beaten
For anything she did
Then one night
Her mom came home high
And the poor child was beaten
As hours went by
Then her mom suddenly
Grabbed for a blade
It was sharp and pointy
One that she made
She thrusted the blade
Right in her chest,
"You deserve to die
You worthless piece of
!The mom walked out
Leaving the girl slowly dying
She grabbed her bear
And again started crying
Police showed up
At the small little house
Then quickly barged in
Everything quiet as a mouse
One officer slowly
Opened a door
To find the little girl
Lying dead on the floor
It must have been bad
To go through so much harm
But at least she died
With her best friend in her arms
A child dies every day from child abuse.
And if you have an ounce of pity in you for Aurora
(the little girl), and you hate child abuse with a passion,
you will repost this and help out those abused children,
and let them know that someone cares for them.
It doesn't take that long only about 10 seconds
so please just do it.
SKIP THIS IF YOU HATE SAD STORIES!
'Jessy you love me don't you' a smile; his
Their breathe spirts weep
'Daddy you know i do; what is it?'
He smiles at his friend; his hand creeps
His friend takes my hand; looks me in the eyes
Daddy's creeping up my nightie; cold hands
I try to pull his hand away; grip is strong!
They look at one another; nod; something planned
I feel my palms sweat; Daddy's under my knickers
'Daddy I'm going to bed! Night' Pulling again
But there grip is to strong for weak me
I look at both; and ask, who are these men?
His fingers going up me; pulling away
His friend leans forward; a kiss? Why?
His tongue moving mine; my eyes squint
Lean back and away; 'Why are you doing this?'
No answer, i feel the pain inside me; him
Chucks the quilt on the floor; me to
I try and scamper away, but I'm not fast
'O Daddy please, i love you'
His friend; pulling at my nightie
And my Dad pulling my pants down
His friend pinning my hands to the floor
As my Dad lies himself on the ground
I squirm; as Daddy friend pulls me up
And places me on top of Daddy; thrusts within
I cry; i bite; i scratch; i slap; i fail
'O Daddy please you win you win!'
I can feel my skin rip; my virginity breaking free
I can feel the blood seep down my leg
'Daddy your hurting me please'
I plead to him and his friend; not even a beg
Daddy's laughing; why does he laugh?
His friend shoves himself in my mouth and moans
Tying my hands together; moving in and out
'Ride me Jessy' He laughs and groans
They smile at one another; laugh to
They roll me over and spread me wide well
My daddy sits on my face; himself in again
While his friend talks and pushes himself inside
I can hardly breathe; i gag for air
I cough and splutter; cry and weep
I beg and plead; but its no use
They've already made me hurt and bleed
I stare into his eyes; that look upon me
This is not my Dad; where is he?
If he was still here; would he care
Would he actually even; see?
Finally they get of and lie me on the sofa
My cheeks blotchy from tears and pain
They play with themselves; all over me
Rub it in; making me feel the shame
'Why Daddy? Please tell me why?'
Dad looks at his friend; and waves him away
'Jessy i love you' he smiles and kisses my cheek
'Is that all you have in your heart to say?'
He puts my nightie on me
I walks me to my bedroom door
Ever since that night; His friend
And himself every Friday come back for more
'Night sweet Girl; You are my life'
Closing the door, tears still down my face
Still the smell of him and his friend
Fade into me like disgrace
I watch the Moon go down; the sun come up
'Jessy its school' Knocking at my door
I cant help but cry; weep in pain
Because I'm so scared he wanted more
But one night daddy took it too far
Daddy and his friend came back for one last shot
They were worried they would get caught
So he and his friend took me to a cemetery lot
I was blindfolded and my hands were tied back
'Daddy please!! Not tonight!'
Daddy and his friend both had their last fun
After that i tried to put up a fight
I begged daddy 'Please no more!'
All he could say 'Shut up you stupid whore!'
Daddy unblindfolded me at last
He said I love you so much
He went back into the car and pulled out a bat
'Daddy I swear I wont say a thing!!!!'
I was dead
After only one swing..........................
RAPE IS SOO WRONG! POST IF YOU AGREE!
My name is Sarah I am but three, My eyes are swollen I cannot see, I must be stupid I must be bad, What else could have made My daddy so mad? I wish I were better I wish I weren't ugly, Then maybe my mommy Would still want to hug me. I can't speak at all I can't do a wrong Or else I'm locked up All the day long When I awake I'm all alone The house is dark My folks aren't home. When my mommy does come I'll try and be nice, So maybe I'll get just One whipping tonight Don't make a sound! I just heard a car My daddy is back From Charlie's Bar. I hear him curse My name he calls I press myself Against the wall. I try and hide From his evil eyes I'm so afraid now I'm starting to cry. He finds me weeping He shouts ugly words, He says its my fault That he suffers at work. He slaps me and hits me And yells at me more,I finally get free And I run for the door. He's already locked it And I start to bawl, He takes me and throws me Against the hard wall. I fall to the floor With my bones nearly broken, And my daddy continues With more bad words spoken. "I'm sorry!", I scream But its now much too late His face has been twisted Into unimaginable hate. The hurt and the pain Again and again Oh please God, have mercy! Oh please let it end! And he finally stops And heads for the door, While I lay there motionless Sprawled on the floor. My name is Sarah And I am but three, Tonight my daddy Murdered me.
please, add this to your page, so to help stop child abuse! thanks
i am about to admit something very huge...
i have an addiction...
and it is impossible to stop...
my addiction is...................................................................................................... ........................................................................................................
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...................................................................... CAKE!
My name is Alaura and i am a cake addict
! I am president of CEA aka Cake Eaters Anonymous
! If you are also an addict, contact me and i will give you the recipe to the best cake ever! 
A PRAYER TO THE CAKE GODS
cake is good

cake is great

cake is who

cake is what

cake is when

cake is where

cake is why

cake is cake

(repeat as much as you want and you will be rewarded with cake!
)- Last seen 11 hours ago. Member since February 1, 2008.
- I'm a citrine experience poet for 170 comments.
- My mood is
, and quote is "poke her face with a disco stick". - I am a 18 year old girl from California (United States)
- When I'm not writing, I'm watchin tv.




























- I am in the groups A CandyLand Adventure RP, Beautiful Bisexual Women, Captivate, Fuzzy Fluffy Fuzz Balls Who Are Very B, Mid moon wolf pack, Noir Campagne, School Time, The Group Better Than All The Rainbow, those who wish to lose weight group mo, unique rainbow lovers Lesbians Gays an
- I have 170 comments, 4 contests, 4 addlines, 5 columns, 93 poems, 3 stories, 4 journals
Active Contests
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bf/gf position available for me!
My Poetry
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i dance among the stars
beating my tambourine -
your hand on my cheek
i lean into your caress
My Stories
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441 lines, 4 comments, June 16. In <600 words, Fantasy, Fiction, Love, Romance, Starting idea, Third person, Young adult
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CHAPTER ONE and CHAPTER TWO
3927 lines, June 10. In 2000-5000 words, Family, Fiction, First person, Humor, Novel, Romance, Unfinished
My other items
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- Column: Janet Evanovich's writing advice at storywrite
just some writing advice for the writer - Column: just so you know..... at allpoetry
i just want you to know this so read it... PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAASE? - Column: who is hotter? at allpoetry
quiz
My journal entries
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i am going to be uber-busy or a few weeks due to school so i am not going to be on AP for a while.. i will try to go on as soon as possible, but until i can go on, i will be sad and miss you all... i hope i can talk to you guys soon. love you all and miss you! xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo lola 1 ps. try not to hate
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[ ] - Dust scares you. [ ] - Your mother had more than 2 children. [ ] - You are a smoker. [ ] - You drink a lot. [x] - You like to write. [] - You are religious. [x] - You like to burn candles. [] - You prefer juice or water over soda. [x] - You have ridden a horse. 11 1 TOTAL SO FAR = 3 2 [ ] - Yo
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gskjgnjhgreuiifbhdsfjbvsuigtherjhbdrygtrhfbdjkljkdgfjsahfkdjgdisuygtdrbgdfugsjfhjfbaweouiry4w856resifuvh 78wtv45 4783 t5vy4uawrhy uit78se0tv9gytiuhg98a7e4hy989846w39086yu984t7689345yu9945Y 4PE8T5E489UE4S8OPT94675896Y89U8957ut98eut958tu6 e4s689u6t [89-yjudr96i0 tjuopridgyueui hy eirugtnhtjuiotyjop ihue-rt57834eogjyoJune 12, In Anger, Escape, Lost in thought, My life, Pain, Personal, Self, Teen issues, Thoughts. 500 words. → Make first comment?
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glitterydoom on October 30i love your page

fireflies in one of my favourite songs
and alot of stuff you have on here made me laugh
also you have a pretty name
<3 -
xXxCaipirinhaxXx on October 16Hiaz.
SEXY QUESTIONS!!!!
sorry, had to get it out.
i lufferz you, Sissy! -
foreveryourslove on October 2hiya agian me stoppin bye to see how my crush is doing
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wander of the sky on September 29hello My little niece
