Hi. My name is April. I am 19 years old at the moment, and have had this account for 2 years. I don't write much anymore, but that's because my nose is always stuck in conquer online, a game which is highly addicting. I don't suggest anyone get it unless they have a LOT of free time.
I am overweight, but always have been. I blame that on my kindergarten teacher and my mother. When I was in kindergarten, they had a play, as most schools do. I signed up for Ariel, Jasmine, Belle, Cinderella, Aurora, all the Disney princesses I could think of... I got "the little pig who built it's house out of straw". Way to shoot down a 5 year olds' dreams there bitch! Long story short, mom said, "Have some ice-cream, it will make you feel better", and since that day I eat for my emotions.
Anyways, back to me. I have a fiancé, named Ray, and we are planning on moving in together. I don't know exactly when, but we are.
I am trying to get over an extreme hatred of my grandmother. When I was 8 she read the bible to me front to back, then told me I was saved. She brainwashed me into thinking that everyone was either a Christian, or a devil worshiper. She told me methodists were Mexican devil worshipers who would rape me if I ever went into their church. She told me I was too fat for her, and put me on a 20 carb a day diet. A slice of bread has 15 carbs... that tells you how much I ate. She abused my mother emotionally as a child, and neglected her. She used me to get back at her husband by spending time with me. He was a very jealous man and they would play games with each other, using me as the pawn.
Again, back to me. I have started a website about animal heroes, and am trying to get the word out about it. http://www.freewebs.com/animalheroes I have always had a thing for animals. Animals can't call you names, they don't purposely hurt you, they just want your love. My love for animals started when I was 7. My granny (on my dad's side) bred and raised coon hunting dogs for sale, and happened to round up a few kittens and bunnies as well. My cousin, Mark, would take these baby kittens, puppies, and bunnies, (I'm talking 2-5 days old here) and hold them under water faucets until green pus came out of every hole in their bodies, and leave them on my doorstep after daddy went to work for me to bury. The summer of my 7th and 8th year, I buried over 30 baby animals.
Mark was very cruel. Though he was my cousin, and even 5 years older than me, he was raised VERY differently. My parents actually cared about me. His, not so much. The summer of my 8th year, he raped me in the back of a car. He said "Hey, April, I want to try something I saw in a movie", took me to the back of an old broken down car and said, "Lift up your dress". I said no, over and over, and he held a little pocket knife to my throat and told me, "Do it now!". I won't go into graphics now or I will start shaking again. Long story short, my cousin, Vicky, (a druggie, and a horrible mother), saw us, pulled us out of the car, and took us to granny, momma, and daddy. Mark whispered to me, "say anything and I will kill you", and poked me with the little pocketknife. That is very scary to an 8 year old, so I shut the hell up and tried not to cry. We both got punished for "experimenting". No one found out until 6 years later, when I was 14 and my mom found a recording I had made concerning the subject.
As you can probably tell by reading this, I know, and like to use, a lot of big words. I like using them because it makes me sound smart. I will be the first to admit, that when it comes to common sense, I don't have much, but I am wonderful at "booklearnin'" as my daddy says.
I was born in Canton Georgia, moved to Jasper Georgia, then to Knoxville Tennessee, Maynardville Tennessee, then Town Creek Alabama, then Mayo Florida, Day Florida, Lafayette Florida, Mulberry Florida, Fort Meade Florida, back to Jasper, then to Canton, back to Jasper, back to Fort Meade, back to Jasper, to another spot in Jasper, back to the original spot in Jasper, to another spot in Jasper, and another spot in Jasper, then back to the original spot in Jasper again, and now I am back in Fort Meade., again... *laughs* No, I am not a military brat, though ironic enough, my step-dad is ex-military.
When I was 6, my parents separated, and I knew it wasn't my fault. It was a mutual thing, and they both realized that it wasn't the best thing for them to stay together. Mom moved us around so much to try and find her "home", but still hasn't found it.
Well, this is me... Who are you?
I am overweight, but always have been. I blame that on my kindergarten teacher and my mother. When I was in kindergarten, they had a play, as most schools do. I signed up for Ariel, Jasmine, Belle, Cinderella, Aurora, all the Disney princesses I could think of... I got "the little pig who built it's house out of straw". Way to shoot down a 5 year olds' dreams there bitch! Long story short, mom said, "Have some ice-cream, it will make you feel better", and since that day I eat for my emotions.
Anyways, back to me. I have a fiancé, named Ray, and we are planning on moving in together. I don't know exactly when, but we are.
I am trying to get over an extreme hatred of my grandmother. When I was 8 she read the bible to me front to back, then told me I was saved. She brainwashed me into thinking that everyone was either a Christian, or a devil worshiper. She told me methodists were Mexican devil worshipers who would rape me if I ever went into their church. She told me I was too fat for her, and put me on a 20 carb a day diet. A slice of bread has 15 carbs... that tells you how much I ate. She abused my mother emotionally as a child, and neglected her. She used me to get back at her husband by spending time with me. He was a very jealous man and they would play games with each other, using me as the pawn.
Again, back to me. I have started a website about animal heroes, and am trying to get the word out about it. http://www.freewebs.com/animalheroes I have always had a thing for animals. Animals can't call you names, they don't purposely hurt you, they just want your love. My love for animals started when I was 7. My granny (on my dad's side) bred and raised coon hunting dogs for sale, and happened to round up a few kittens and bunnies as well. My cousin, Mark, would take these baby kittens, puppies, and bunnies, (I'm talking 2-5 days old here) and hold them under water faucets until green pus came out of every hole in their bodies, and leave them on my doorstep after daddy went to work for me to bury. The summer of my 7th and 8th year, I buried over 30 baby animals.
Mark was very cruel. Though he was my cousin, and even 5 years older than me, he was raised VERY differently. My parents actually cared about me. His, not so much. The summer of my 8th year, he raped me in the back of a car. He said "Hey, April, I want to try something I saw in a movie", took me to the back of an old broken down car and said, "Lift up your dress". I said no, over and over, and he held a little pocket knife to my throat and told me, "Do it now!". I won't go into graphics now or I will start shaking again. Long story short, my cousin, Vicky, (a druggie, and a horrible mother), saw us, pulled us out of the car, and took us to granny, momma, and daddy. Mark whispered to me, "say anything and I will kill you", and poked me with the little pocketknife. That is very scary to an 8 year old, so I shut the hell up and tried not to cry. We both got punished for "experimenting". No one found out until 6 years later, when I was 14 and my mom found a recording I had made concerning the subject.
As you can probably tell by reading this, I know, and like to use, a lot of big words. I like using them because it makes me sound smart. I will be the first to admit, that when it comes to common sense, I don't have much, but I am wonderful at "booklearnin'" as my daddy says.
I was born in Canton Georgia, moved to Jasper Georgia, then to Knoxville Tennessee, Maynardville Tennessee, then Town Creek Alabama, then Mayo Florida, Day Florida, Lafayette Florida, Mulberry Florida, Fort Meade Florida, back to Jasper, then to Canton, back to Jasper, back to Fort Meade, back to Jasper, to another spot in Jasper, back to the original spot in Jasper, to another spot in Jasper, and another spot in Jasper, then back to the original spot in Jasper again, and now I am back in Fort Meade., again... *laughs* No, I am not a military brat, though ironic enough, my step-dad is ex-military.
When I was 6, my parents separated, and I knew it wasn't my fault. It was a mutual thing, and they both realized that it wasn't the best thing for them to stay together. Mom moved us around so much to try and find her "home", but still hasn't found it.
Well, this is me... Who are you?
- Last seen 2 days ago. Member since May 25, 2006.
- I'm a aventurine thought poet for 50 comments.
- My mood is , and quote is "If you say, 'plz', because it is shorter than, 'please', then I will say, 'no', because it is shorter than, 'yes'.".
- I am a 19 year old woman from Florida (United States)
- When I'm not writing, I'm chasing my cat around, drawing, or playing online games (e.g. Conquer Online - Neopets).
- Visit my homepage at www.myspace.com/velvetplague
- I have 50 comments
My Poetry
-
-
I want to save us.
I feel like we are going down the drain,33 lines, July 2. In Teenage thinking, Teen issues, Angry, Family, Happiness, Depressed, Loss, Message
Visitor Book
1 - 1 of 1
-
bookworm987 on June 29, 2006Thanks for your comment on my poem. I'm glad that it touched you.
[Elizabeth♥]
