VelvetWings• Show poetry

ヴェルヴェット翼

Hello. I am Sparrow. ☆

This is a poem written for me by a dear friend, TheSpiralGenerator :
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A Sparrow's Escape

With fragile bones
And a mute voice
Rests the sparrow
Within her corroded cage.

Her heart was swollen
With hopes of flying-
Hopes of one day singing
While escaping under the yellow sun.

She had silver stars in her eyes,
Masked over by the sorrow
Of being kept prisoner behind
Such rusted, locked bars.

With struggle, the lock finally
Gave way to her awaited freedom.
With struggle, she flies free under
The beautiful sun, and onward through
The night, under the silver stars.


Written on November 2nd, 2009.
-Sadien-

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♥

***POETRY***
When it comes to poetry, I prefer not to rhyme. It's not that I can't--
I believe free verse poetry is much more expressive, especially when it pertains to many of the themes I write about. Sticking to a particular form, in my opinion, is restricting what can be said.

Of course I still enjoy writing haiku; sometimes all that there is can be said in only a few words. I always write my haiku first in Japanese (with 5-7-5 format) and then translate them into English. I used to translate into 5-7-5 format as a challenge to myself, but after some criticism and personal thought about what a haiku really is, I've recently adapted a 3-5-3 format in English as well. I still like my haiku to have even syllabary like that; it sounds more rhythmic to me and more accurately reflects the original Japanese form.


***CRITICISM***
I joined AllPoetry more to be inspired and destroy writer's block than to receive criticism or hone my skills. Even though writing is not a career path for me, it is one of my main hobbies and I am particularly pleased when I am able to write something that sounds fluent and is well-received by readers. However, my poetry is a mirror of my own thoughts and feelings, as well as my view of the world I live in. It is me, in a deeper sense, and although I appreciate another poet's willingness to help me improve my writing ability, I will very rarely change my poems under the scrutiny of another.


***CONTESTS***
One of my favourite features about this site as opposed to other writing sites is the point system. I enjoy earning points and hosting contests, as well as trying my luck with entering them. I know I'm not a perfect writer and hardly expect to win each time, but I am proud when I do. And because of this pride I take in my own work, I refuse to enter contests that seem to be written up and hosted by someone careless about their own writing. For example, a contest with grammar and spelling errors (especially those that have a rule against such things, and believe me I see a lot of this). I find that many contest rules are just pointless, such as asking a writer to put something unrelated to the poem in their author's notes 'to prove you read the rules.' If the poem doesn't break any of the rules, then it's clear someone read them, isn't it?

It's just one of my pet peeves about this site, and I'm probably known by a few hosts for pointing out their contest flaws. Well, if you can't live up to your own standards, don't expect other people to. That's all.


Great friends/writers:
k.malakante
TheSpiralGenerator
Rose Dark Thorn
Victoria of Aragon
Kamijo
littlelostsoul


Previously named:
Laululintu
varpunen laulaa