Here are the most important things I can say about myself:
1) I am a lover of hate and a hater of love.
2) I have tasted rape and it tasted like betrayal.
3) I have tried to be the best friend I could possibly be.
4) I have feared only one thing in my life, and that was losing what I held most dear to me in this god forsaken place. I lost him, my everything, my little boy. Now, I have nothing left to fear but everything to grieve for.
5) And I wait for the day that he opens my heart and watches my life spew from it. I sit back, silent. Pretending not to notice what breaks my heart into.
6) At some point we will have a very important, life changing choice to make. Both options will seem wrong and the option we choose will haunt us forever.
7) Of the few people I hate, I hate me the most, which in turn feeds the hate for the other's.
~~~I stumbled on a picture of my son, by searching all the schools he could possibly be going to in his area. Here he is:
http://i426.photobucket.com/albums/pp344/HauntedGhost/Landon_61.jpg
I love him so much and as happy as I am to be able to just see a school picture of him, I hurt so badly wanting to hold him. He looks empty to me.
My Birthday... this year...
http://i426.photobucket.com/albums/pp344/HauntedGhost/1337036_height370_width560.jpg 25 frickin' years old and starting to show every bit of it... I don't like it.
Someday, I'll fill the emptiness with something.
http://i426.photobucket.com/albums/pp344/HauntedGhost/im000768.jpg ~Me
http://i426.photobucket.com/albums/pp344/HauntedGhost/f_bildem_361fb2f.jpg ~Stacey and Me
1) I am a lover of hate and a hater of love.
2) I have tasted rape and it tasted like betrayal.
3) I have tried to be the best friend I could possibly be.
4) I have feared only one thing in my life, and that was losing what I held most dear to me in this god forsaken place. I lost him, my everything, my little boy. Now, I have nothing left to fear but everything to grieve for.
5) And I wait for the day that he opens my heart and watches my life spew from it. I sit back, silent. Pretending not to notice what breaks my heart into.
6) At some point we will have a very important, life changing choice to make. Both options will seem wrong and the option we choose will haunt us forever.
7) Of the few people I hate, I hate me the most, which in turn feeds the hate for the other's.
~~~I stumbled on a picture of my son, by searching all the schools he could possibly be going to in his area. Here he is:
http://i426.photobucket.com/albums/pp344/HauntedGhost/Landon_61.jpg
I love him so much and as happy as I am to be able to just see a school picture of him, I hurt so badly wanting to hold him. He looks empty to me.
My Birthday... this year...
http://i426.photobucket.com/albums/pp344/HauntedGhost/1337036_height370_width560.jpg 25 frickin' years old and starting to show every bit of it... I don't like it.
Someday, I'll fill the emptiness with something.
http://i426.photobucket.com/albums/pp344/HauntedGhost/im000768.jpg ~Me
http://i426.photobucket.com/albums/pp344/HauntedGhost/f_bildem_361fb2f.jpg ~Stacey and Me
- Last seen 1 day ago. Member since March 23, 2006.
- I'm a pyrite eye poet for 1,095 comments.
- My mood is , and quote is "I imagine you expected something witty to be here. ".
- I am a girl from North Carolina (United States)
- I am in the groups The Light Board
- I have 1,095 comments, 52 poems
My Poetry
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The night creeps under my skin
there is little I can do -
I don't know what else to say. I have succumbed to drinking to make it through my days. It's okay though. It's legal. As long as I'm at home. The pills I've been given are at best, minimal at relieving heart pain. Not that an24 lines, 13 comments, July 1
Guest Book
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Daegal on October 22We don't talk nearly as much as we should any more. I'm very sorry, life out here is hectic and busy! Love
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Erik Ambrose on September 15
I've read some, and feel anything I might say couldn't do justice to what I actually feel. So, a hug works, right? -
nicki1 on August 29Aw, thank you.
I hope you're doing well.
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Darc Raven : Someday, I'll fill the emptiness with something. on August 11should fill it with funions!
