Sitara• Show poetry

In The valley of hearts and knights ,flowers roses and rainbows ,he was born for someone who loved him with all her might.She knew it from the time she heard his voice without even seeing him.He did not know it.She killed herself a thousand times a day to nourish him with her blood and he drank it all without knowing what was giving him the glow of life.He captured hearts and glorified in adding strange names to his simple name.He did not know her power ,he did not know her soul.He kept all daggers pointed and pierced in her heart to drink her blood to fill his life up
In a sea of people God creates meetings and then he leaves whole gaping black holes in hearts by destroying the moments that were once holding us together.At times theres a craving for the soul of just one being.If only I could even express myself ,in words which I cant.Long Long ago I was a stone.
As I looked around there seemed no one who could reach into me.
You , others,sort of brushed passed me in a small hazy pathway.




Aaj phirse utaar lana hai
chaand dewaar pe rakh jana hai
tere aangan main hum khade kab se
aur yeh dil hua dewaana hai

Teri ankhon ki hun tabeer magar
mere sapne bohot nakam huwey
teri ahat mein kho gayi duniya
meri baton ke paas bol nahi

tuney chora sabhi lamhon ka hisaab
main bhula baithi hun wakt ka hosh
neeley badal hari chaun ka sukh
Ek hi pul hai ke ban paata nahin
sitara*







JOY

Its always been a big question ,to say the least and a great quest in all eras and now I sit trying to unravel the threads of my mind that are coiled up.I and many others run after that eternal happiness where life dances in joy but usually all the dreams ,their fulfillment also dont make you ultimately or completely happy.Theres always a price tag attached to the attainment of dreams ,the 'catch 'as they say!

In my years I have seen all the vulnerabilities ,the wants ,the weaknessess ,the truth ,the hunger,the pain ,and always I try to hide my own,yet at times I am not able to.
If only we all gave in to the basic idea of life that has been given to us ,as it has been painted full of joys and despairs,and if only we all decided to live in peace and harmony with our own souls.The moment the quest of joy ,the quest of success , the dream of immense power or wealth seeps into us ,the moment destroys our peace and it starts a cycle of want.The cobra of wanting is so overwhelming,desires dig into the brain like thorns and nails.Life is the happiest when nearest to God and nature,joy lies in the hands of very simple things.



My dreams these days are distorted,so much seems to be happening
Life is never planned.And I never thought I would stand here where I stand today.All my links are down .All my sucessess seem like floating ripples ended before time.Is it my pessimism ,the world around me or is there really a sense of chaos and failure all around.Today,as again I feel the day vanishing ,the heat of the day abating slowly and the breeze going a bit cooler,I want to write a lot
I am creating dreams and moments. I would love to weave beautiful moods,make huge impacts,create moments of deep longings,or intense nostalgia,at times make someone dumbfounded or tear eyed.
Its by writing some words ,that we can leave a stamp on some pages of time where somebody ,from some corner of the world ,can actually read and relate to....
If an author or poet writes,what exactly does he or she want.Money?Fame?or just that the words in chains can inspire ,assuage and help someone in times of deep distress or depression.A writer can write miracles.
Words are the most powerful medium ,where dwells profound feelings.Writing ...........a medium of unbound imagination bringing life to everything thats unreal in a real world.


If I knew I would be your slave without the will to admit it......i wouldnt be your slave
Its been a lot of moments where I have dedicated my soul ,my thoughts my emotions and my Love,which I had no control not to offer you,I have spent with you.At times I fear that I know the future will see us together because theres no other option for the future.At times I realise that a story of me and you was written in stone when God himself was writing down important stories At times I know I have no way of escape from you but I know thats what makes me wanto go away

Kuch is tarah mujhe gulab kardiya usne
andheri raat thi mahtab kardiya usne
sare mehfil mujhe dekha aise
mujhey saara hijaab kardiya usne
sabhi raste huey they khaar khaar
unhein shadab kardiya usne
meri baton mein kai lamhein they
Unhein kitaab kardiya usne
sitara*

Aadha utra hua chehra pehen ke aata hai
gol sa chaand kabhi kat ke toot jaata hai......


Raat tanha hai kisi khwab ke bichadne se
aankh mein raakh kisi aag ki bikharti hai,

meri saanso ki ik dard se shanasaai
mere honthon ke ab geet bujhe jaate hain...

tum meri zaat se uthkar yun gaye
jaise awaaz se sab sur chootey....


tum meri zindagi ko kiske paas chor aaye
meri tanhayi bhi ab saath nahi mere hai,,,,,

ik safar dard ka tha dard se tamam hua
ik nazar sabz thi woh khaakh hui
sitara*

Today again there was a blue green river flowing

throuh his eyes that haunted and mesmerised

my soul.Today i saw the fire,the ice,the deep

dark clouds the sand and the drizzle,the dead

the live and more in just a single moment of

life.If we sit in our own place and think that life

will meet us halfway

If you keep your palms

closed and your eyes shut if you dont join the

force that hurls you forward than you are

better off dead.If you dont pick the one sweet

moment out of all the others if you cant decide

where the golden rivers flow and how they turn

you ,you need to be awake and do it.Or else life

will be passing you by unseen unheard and

unfelt. I know it all yet i am unmoving,stoned.

Some alive moments are always popping up

like popcorn as I hear you .You know,physicality is

felt like a texture a touch ,a bit of being

felt.But defeat and victory,submission,and

love,and hope ,faith and elation are what makes

our mind decide what is worth it all.


Feelings are
vibes we feel across all distances

sur subah ka raag
teri soch
mera bhaag
tu samay ki jeet
mera garv meri preet
tu khushi ka roop
kuch din dhoop
kuch din raat
tu hansi ki baat
bheegi raat ka sangeet
main andheri raat
karkey pyar
kha gayai maat
tuu ujala hai savera hai
nayi barsaat
tu mere andar rakha
hai ek darya sa
tu meri ankhon ka
kajal aur meri neend
main akeli baat
samay ki haar
ek dewwar
har khadam par shor
hai ik bhor
phir bhi saat
jab guzarte chand ki baraat
hogi saat
tu milega aur phir
ajayegi barsaat




............................................


Main to unwan dhundti hun ab
main to unwan dhundti hun ab
jaise sadiyon se likhi ek kahani ho tum

jaise barson ki shanasaai ka dars ho ik
ab padha ab chakha ab bhi samajh na aaya

naam hota nahin har rishtey ke neeche likha
yeh zaroori nahin ke rishta banayein tumko

joh wo benaam tha lamha jahan zinda thi main
wo hi lamha mujhe saari umar sonp gaya

yeh bhi mumkin nahin sochun ke ,bas dard na ho
aur mumkin hai yehi dard ko jeevan karlun

mod mud jaaye na khojaye na chehra ik dum
aankh moondhe hue tasveer pakad rakhi hai

shaam dhal jaaye na utre na sehar ka yeh khumaar
zard awaaz ki dastak ko mala hai dil par

raat thi chaand ko dekha to najaane kyun
ek aansun ko machalta hua tanha paaya

lamha lamha badal na jaye mere ghar ka hisaab
ek saaye ko yahan maine pighalta paya

bhool jaati hun khalam se ungliyon ka sawaal
bhool jaaon na saanson ko jawaan rakhna hai

utra rehta hai sare shaam yaad ka chehra
bheega lagta hai har raat khwab ka tukda
sitara*


A strange light floated through the blue clouds and made me shiver.It was morning yet i felt sleepy and couldnt see beyond that one dream.You said I write like a crazed lunatic .Yes there are things of the mind that weave like a web inside our selves but cant be explained.I loved the way you laughed at my romanticism in the dream .But I am made this way.You will see me through the veil of my words.But to see me you need to sort through my bits and pieces.To pick up things where there are no blocks of space stopping you from touching me inside myself.

Life is a float
moving bobbing up and down
I grasp at corners as I feel threatened
I love the fright of toppling over....Yet I cling to bits ,soaking in the fear ..collapsing into the silence
Life is the maze I am roaming through,looking for moments lost where time had caressed my being with sweet touches of love.The road ahead is long yet ,and there seems to be myself searching again for a small rest in time where the soul sleeps peacefully.Life is dizzy and bees hum in my dreams .The buzzing drives me to a dull sleep.i deviate from the normal and stop myself just before I topple into some hole where though I see the star I lose my own entity to find myself I know I have to leave behind a lot of things.


It bore your marks! the clean white paper burnt at the topmost edge

It smelt like long lost friends I had and
It folded its palms to pray
It talked to me all night and slept with me
The thought you made me give birth to??

Remember when we walked over the blue mountains
hand in hand
It bore your mark !

"She creeps up pipes attached to peoples dreamhouses.She builds her own treehouses too ,but still she feels un anchored,lost,floating around.She wishes her heart and home were together.She hopes to build her own home like Robinson crusoe did.She also knows that the love and faith that grow in her are demonic and soon they will burn her to death."
As it is night theres stars out there.Many times YOU brush my hand with love.You come like a dance and break like a song in my eyes.





Writing at random from the open seams of a pained soul ,I know exactly what I cry for .The way to express pain is always the same,Isnt it??
But we all hide behind our hard bound egos nurturing the hurts and growing cactii for eons till they scrape our heartwalls and protrude out of the flesh killing bits of love everyday.Severed minds ,cut off from reality!How i wish we were in caves.Living moments of blissful empty thoughts.Unending I would perhaps wait long hours for you to come back
Life is a tipsy topsy balance of ups and downs.There are times in my isolation when I know its death.What else is death if not an oblivion,a cutting away from all and everything.I need a mask of oxygen again to feel resusciated ,Cant I breathe like a normal ordinary being instead of gasping for bits of life .
That night he came close to owning me but he left me like a dolphin on silver sands hoping that again it would splash and dance in waters!!But dolphins die on dry lands.Ferris wheels stop and red signals if broken are dangerous and lead you to a chaos of metallic bangs.I am the shattered glass today with a burning mind .Each glass piece has a cutting edge but reflects me."Theres my face with many others reflected in the pieces ".My body has pieces of glass pierced all over and a mind burning but not being used ,as it should be. I told myself I vill assume responsibility for myself and my being only if I know where I start and where I end."I am travelling and the past is holding your hand still.Its a thin white curtain and hidden behind it I find myself floating ,shut in a coccoon where no one can enter my mind."The cocoon floats above a sea of people ."I am holding a buzzing swarm of thoughts in my mind with photos and audio flashes.I am isolated living in a sea of things called humans "
Dancing in the mind are thoughts always of creation ,of work ,of life, and love,the creator the world.We crave to find a balance or that single moment when all of our feelings the physical ,mental, spiritual are at peace ,also the emotional.That moment is always a victory a bliss in life ,but we all usually dont attain it easily .The moments where this balance is non exixting comes the restlessness the anxiety the search,of the balance again..When I write I feel a bit less thirsty than before...


You and Me

Is it wrong she asked to want to be an identity?She could understand the world of peole all running all ways to conquer time and create a memorial .To leave a huge footprint of their being in the hardbaked sands of time. Every identity needs hard work and she was right that everybody needs an identity.

They are mountain goats ,He was a shepherd ,as always searching for his treasure.I have a shepherd in me too.Mountain goats are the masters that enslave the mountains.Those huge creatures of stone the giant sky reaching dead mountains are tickled by the soft footed mountains goats.Thus the mountains await their arrival ,sometimes the goats and their babies wear bells and the mountains can hear melody as jerky as ever but still ,and smile.Everyday the shepherd craves to be a masterpiece of either hours ,the seconds,the dreams ,the stars or the moments that passed by .Everyday was not enough for him to create anything.There were just the goats,the mountains,and blank air.The dumb sheep and goats and high mountains standing since ages without reason ….was there a reason anymore for anything.Maybe you don’t have THE time but still I am telling you ,writing it down for record.just so that you know.Days seem so scary and nights are the peace that cradle me."Always I judge my own self in the light of your candle .Everyday I grant you prayers for flying farther and farther.To a land of recognition farther than the farthest."

If there was a path I am shown by the Force,it was a path you showed me .If I have picture in front of me to create my own masterpieces may be It was you,but you are not the star I can touch and spread the colour with my fingers over my eyes so that I see you everywhere Unknown to all I admit my failures to myself I know me( and it is only Her that I know .)
Deep Is the knowledge of knowing .But Somehow somewhere along coming to know me I came to understand that I know me and you .At times it feels the same.

The road is full of unknown stories .All ways are filled with yearning I sit unrested ,disturbed,but I think longingly of that one sign I can see where I can release a fountain of my unfiltered laughter at the beck of a look.I hold back all emotions again,and fake all the nuances and moods to create a harmonized tapestry but I see all the disturbed seams breaking open.You see nothing because you are totally absorbed in a film of your own.You are always there since time started to give me my independence .As my ideas evolved from untrained thoughts you stood watching .You are here but never visible to me .I know you wait but you have to wait till I can see and reach you.
There are so many ladders all around ,some doors ,some windows,blocks of cement,that they use to make into walls to create homes.There are skylights and beams but all I find in people is a darkness ,a thick wall where always theres dark spots ,I find the days useless

She told me her world was small but dreams huge ,they conquered the wide spaces in her eyes blanketing all the unslept sleep and soon those dreams were like growing ivy.Creeping over body they coloured her soul and told her in whispers what was needed to form identification in a huge market buzzing with strangers.
As an old house is refurbished her spirit sprang into a surge of fresh new colours .You sold her the dreams ,each being a million years old.yet priceless and genuine .You told her to dream and she melted in the golden hopes ,forgetting all the black chains,and high towers,yet again again and again she fell in deep ruts and gutters lost her hopes and dreams and cried.
In her dreams there are stars that turn off and leave her in darkness.she looks towards the lowest steps of ladders scared to climb as all roads are covered by broken hearts.
I have decided to write with more control and focus,not to write anything that seems meaningless to most,but at times I only need to untwine the long ropes ,coils,jumbles in my mind.I need to clear up the spaces and remove the doubts that cramp up my thoughts.Have anyone seen the cage of wind that grabs and binds the birds from all sides.Have you felt the suffocation of the fishes in the heavy waters.The waters harbour them or capture them?
Have you seen the light cocooned in caves.Is it me exploring the world or my soul searching for freedom.

THE GODDESS OF LOVE

She rose from the calender of centuries
The Goddess of Love
denounced the world
As she rejoiced ,
Dancing
in the ravines of Loneliness
She glanced at mirrors
in strange hallways
reflecting her own mystery
Pacified
Yet unsated
The wax of time burnt on her toes
as she crept
and moved
towards the Sun
A ray was her fate
A speck her Light
She grabbed to colour her naked soul
but
The Goddess Of Love

Failed again
sitara*


Life Is A big SURPRISE

If you know theres a big surprise behind the corner you turn ,You turn very quickly
Turn around,see thats it You want to see the unseen and yet you feel the flicker of fear.I have grown a huge tree in my heart that nests several birds of different desires.As night falls all the birds cry themselves to sleep .each morning they start afresh chirping like new born birdies and lead me to thier garden by thier chirps.I feel like a safe follower.I follow desires with the sun.but each night again the birds cry and sleep
She looks at me quitely asking why theres darkness within the circles of moonlight
I hate the stars tonight.I dont know why they dont shower on me
Why dark doors and windows entice me ,Why does a simple day feel like a mystery to me
She knows all the questions she wants will not be answered.I deny her the freedom to ask me everything but she keeps up her line of questions bugging me all the time,day and night
Tell me are tall trees still just tall or only proud.can we still feel pebbles dancing down the slopes.Why does an age of togetherness seem like a blank page.I f its just you I want why is there a She in me A me a myself.
She lives in me quitely ,roams here and there ,at times she explores the world of colour line and form,At times she plays emotional games with sailors eating pain slowly ,relishing the taste .Of late she has been beating like my heart,a true lover ,she loves me for what I am.
Its a miracle I know her and nobody else is needed .Today my need to know her and nothing else is important,I have to know her as she knows me but she feels unexplainable at times If life is scrutinized theres moments when we scream for freedom.As long as the maze of days and night is alive we are alive.We go arund meeting ,puzzled,accepting,not accepting searching day and night.Obscure ,abstract unknown mysteries haunt all of us.Memories blending into painful tortures we reach for the peak of happimess but always we are just a little way behind


"Coiled up hosepipes on the green lawns
trees that reach upto the stars
houses holding people without faces
a city full of life .....yet dead


MILESTONE

Milestone


I know you
You are
The transparent Milestone
That was supposed to grow
On the road of my Life
I know you!
You are the bright star
That broke suddenly
Into my orbit
Scintillating all my dreams,
I was the thirst
But you are the sun
that fills my spaces
with a sea of love

I stand proudly
owning you
devoured a new desire
disowned myself to give you a space
and I proclaimed
I know you!
That was only yesterday
As I look at todays date
I ask myself
And find a truth
Do I really Know You?
Siara*


Trucks Passing By Late Night

There was just a form,a line,a character of lonely curves going round and round in my eyes.There were sounds my soul listened to,I understood.I found long stories in the sounds of these trucks passing on the roads late at night,on long wintery nights.The moon stood proudly,holding his own face reflected in the mirror of the sky.A long road,A row of trucks,late night desperate quiteness accompanied my tired mind,body and soul.I travelled along the roads envying the truck drivers(lol).
Suddenly my mind glittered now,free.
Fantasy led me to hold a moment of escape sitting on a huge truck.Some tasks,some tales,some turns,some hopes,some burdens.Night deepened,and then started sinking into a deep well where the moon was already drowning.I heard the moon screaming for help.I tried to save it pulling it out with a rope,but,it drowned in the well to die.The well was surrounded by marble slabs .I saw minute white shining taj mahals painted all around .There is my King who thinks I am the Queen .I wish I was a Queen who owned a truck.But I refuse to be anything but a free spirit.
Sometimes all the people turn into one person and destroy the vagueness of others.Theres just one shining Sun lighting up the sky.Theres no one beyond the Him