Okay once again not real but hilarious
"Actual analogies and metaphors found in high school essays:
1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.
2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.
3. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.
4. She grew on him like she was a colony of E.coli and he was room-temperature Canadian beef.
5. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
7. He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.
8. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM.
9. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.
10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.
11. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.
12. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.
13. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.
14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.
15. They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth.
16. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
17. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant and she was the East River.
18. Even in his last years, Grandpappy had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.
19. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.
20. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.
21. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.
22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.
23. The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.
24. It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.
25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.
26. Her eyes were like limpid pools, only they had forgotten to put in any pH cleanser.
27. She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.
28. It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall."
Hi! I love slam poetry!
"It was like watching someone you hate getting mugged: three seconds of hard-core violence, and when it was over you just wanted it to happen again." -David Sedaris
I live in my own little world. And yes it is lovely thank you very much. I live there with my dog. Her name is Daisy mae.
some things i like to do:
-play with my puppy!
-hang out with my friends
-read
-watch chick flicks with my friends
-watch barbie movies with my friends
-read
-write songs/poetry even though it's all really amateur quality (no i am not fishing for complements here. this is what happens when you hang out with people who are so good at what they do it's scary. i mean it. really you guys you're creeping me out.)
-read
-listen to musical show tunes on my ipod
-email my friends
-work in ceramics (not that good at that either but it's a dang good stress reliever)
-read
I LOVE DAISY MAE!!!!!! (my doggy)
kudos to all my pals on this site
and please leave comments
i really like comments
THANKS!
Quote
haiku (originally in different language)
My house burned down
Now I can better see
The rising moon
-anonymous
"Actual analogies and metaphors found in high school essays:
1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.
2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.
3. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.
4. She grew on him like she was a colony of E.coli and he was room-temperature Canadian beef.
5. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
7. He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.
8. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM.
9. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.
10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.
11. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.
12. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.
13. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.
14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.
15. They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth.
16. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
17. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant and she was the East River.
18. Even in his last years, Grandpappy had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.
19. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.
20. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.
21. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.
22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.
23. The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.
24. It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.
25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.
26. Her eyes were like limpid pools, only they had forgotten to put in any pH cleanser.
27. She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.
28. It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall."
Hi! I love slam poetry!
"It was like watching someone you hate getting mugged: three seconds of hard-core violence, and when it was over you just wanted it to happen again." -David Sedaris
I live in my own little world. And yes it is lovely thank you very much. I live there with my dog. Her name is Daisy mae.
some things i like to do:
-play with my puppy!
-hang out with my friends
-read
-watch chick flicks with my friends
-watch barbie movies with my friends
-read
-write songs/poetry even though it's all really amateur quality (no i am not fishing for complements here. this is what happens when you hang out with people who are so good at what they do it's scary. i mean it. really you guys you're creeping me out.)
-read
-listen to musical show tunes on my ipod
-email my friends
-work in ceramics (not that good at that either but it's a dang good stress reliever)
-read
I LOVE DAISY MAE!!!!!! (my doggy)
kudos to all my pals on this site
and please leave comments
i really like comments
THANKS!
Quote
haiku (originally in different language)
My house burned down
Now I can better see
The rising moon
-anonymous
- Last seen on Nov 3 9:17 PM. Member since June 21, 2008.
- I'm a supertopaz delight poet for 88 comments.
- My mood is , and quote is ""Surprise! It's the clothes!" (Skulduggery Pleasant fan at your service)".
- I am a 16 year old girl (United States)
- When I'm not writing, I'm Reading.
- I have 88 comments, 21 poems
Poems I'm focused on
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NOT DONE YET BUT READ IT ANYWAYS. ITS ALL SAID WITH A SMILE. KEEP THAT IN MIND.25 lines, July 29, 2008
-
Have you heard of
Singing in the Rain?51 lines, 3 comments, July 1, 2008. In Blah -
I hope you like it! It's a song but I couldn't write the tune. :-)111 lines, 4 comments, June 21, 2008. In My wildest dream, My strongest hope, My personal feelings, My greatest wish
My Poetry
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Realizing my life isn't going as planned
I must admit that I find myself dammed18 lines, 1 comment, September 18 -
I'm standing at the door
I can't hear you anymore35 lines, 1 comment, August 4
Guest Book
1 - 3 of 3
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Goldpiranhafinch on September 21, 2008HI!!!! I AM LEAVING YOU A COMMENT BECAUSE YOU LIKE COMMENTS SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!! I HATE LAB REPORTS!!!!!! I LOVE MY PLAY!!!! COVER YOUR EYES AND EARS WHEN MY MOM COMES OUT IN A STRIPED SHIRT THINGY!!!!!!!! YEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE ADRENALINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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TwilaTarragon on September 16, 2008what happened to your letter? it made me laugh...
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TwilaTarragon on June 29, 2008Hi you!!!!! You have a page on here!!!!! Cool!!!!!! I'm using way too many exclamation points here!!!!!!! Whatever!!!!!!!
"What's that?"
"What does it look like?"
"It looks like a parcel."
"Then that's what it is."
"But whats inside the parcel?"
"If I tell you I deprive the parcel of its entire reason to be."
"And what is its reason to be?"
"To be opened, of course, and to reveal what its holding."
cheers
-Twila
