Clutching a balloon,
I walk slowly
for the last time...
Each step I take
brings me closer
to an end
I know I must reach...
and with every step I take
I clutch the string
of the balloon
ever ready to fly away.
I walk slowly
gazing at my surroundings,
taking them in
for the last time
and my eyes wander
to the sky
as I wonder
how high it goes,
and what would happen
if I let go of the string
I hold so firmly...
and as I take
my final,
slow,
reluctant steps,
I realize that this
is the end
and as the string
slips from my fingers
I wonder
if I made the right decision.
Should I have waited?
Kept the balloon
until it shriveled
as the last of its air
slowly slipped out?
Or was it best
to set it free
while it was still
able to fly?
I watch it rise
into the never-ending sky
and as it floats further away,
I feel a part of me
floating with it,
but as it disappears
into the clouds
I feel as free
as the balloon,
knowing I was finally
ready to let go.
Author notes
I've had a crush on the same guy for more than two years...since October of 2002, and near the end of this school year, things were starting to get out of control...so many people knew about it, and there was so much pressure for me to ask him to Prom, and he said no...and then I found out he knew about my crush, and was upset that so many people knew...things just exploded, and I realized that I just need to let things go and move on...so I wrote this back in early July...I think it was July 6, and on July 17, 2 years and 9 months from the day I started liking him, I walked down the street that started the whole crush, and actually let a balloon go, with the first three lines of this poem written on it.
I kept meaning to post this, but I never got around to it, but inspired by a contest about letting go, I decided it was time to post it...
For all of you who know about the crush, and how much it meant to me...letting go does not mean I'm going to forget the hundred or so poems (and their corresponding stories...as well as the ones that don't have poems) I wrote about him, it just means things happened that made me realize it's pointless to think there is a future to any of it...
Writing this actually made me feel a lot better, so here it is for everyone to read.
Kayla*
Written August 24th, 2005
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Comments
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You should use this one too. It has a great use of symbolism. I have a balloon background you can have for this if you want to use it.
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and my eyes wander
to the sky
as I wonder
how high it goes,
I loved this stanza the most! I wrote a poem that asks a similar question:
Soar
into the Unknown...
centrifugal force
sinuous motion.
Cut loose the
sandbags
betray gravity
Where does helium go?
And it is kind of dealing with the same thing, letting go old ideas and exploring new ones.
I like your imagery, I like your metaphor, and I like the positiveness of the poem, the freedom it expresses. Great job, Kayla, this is one of my favorites by you.
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