"LIFE should not be a journey to the GRAVE with the intention of arriving SAFELY in an ATTRACTIVE and well PRESERVED body, but rather to SKID in the SIDELINES, CHOCOLATE in one hand WINE in the other, BODY thoroughly USED UP, totally WORN OUT, and screaming 'WOO HOO WHAT A RIDE'"
Abt me:
I am:exhausted
I hurt:because of you
I love:all the wrong people
I hate:what I don't let you see
I fear:what you could do
I regret:not telling you I love you earlier
I hope:you can be happy
I hear:things you haven't said yet
I crave:what I don't have
I cry:when I lose control of my feelings
I care
or everyone
I alwaysuck it up eventually
I long:to have what I need
I feel:alone
I listen:but I'm never heard
I hide:inside myself when I'm scared of what you could see
I drive:myself mad
I sing:to cheer people up
I dance:to feel good
I write:when I need to talk
I play:with my hair when something's on my mind
I miss:you when you're gone
I searchor answers
I learn:my lesson too late
I feel:every emotion possible
I know:that I'm wrong but try to be right
I say:sorry way too much
I succeed:but make a mess of it
I fail:because I gave up too quickly
I dream
f things I want
I sleep:when I can't keep my eyes open anymore
I wonder:what will happen to us
I want:what we used to have
I worry:that you're really leaving me
I have:no hope left
I give:everything and recieve nothing
I fight:but rarely win
I waitor too long and lose what I was going after
I need:to be loved
I thinkar too much
I sadden:when you cry
I kill:myself in my dreams
I break:my own heart by breaking yours
I see:what you can't say in your eyes
I smell:through my nose
I taste:with my tongue
I workor acceptance and respect
I remember:things you told my years ago
I hold:you close to my heart
I pray:just not in the way you want me too
I walk:away when the hurt becomes too much
I read:books that question my thoughts
I burn:when I lose control of my thoughts
I breathe:to stay alive
I touchn things butbdon't finish them
I said:nothing when I should have talked
I have:your friendship but I'm not sure I want it
I fall:everytime you let me go
I live:every day but...
I die:every night!
NAME-GEMMA
AGE-19
BIRTHDAY-24/05/1988
BIRTH PLACE-GLASGOW SCOTLAND
MOTHERS NAME-SHARON
FATHERS NAME-JAMES
EYE COLOUR-BLUE
HAIR COLOUR-BRUNETTE BUT DYED RED
PIERCINGS-13
WHERE-8EARS, 2LIPS, EYEBROW, NECK AND NIPPLE
TATTOOS-JUST 1
STEREOTYPE-MYSELF
FAV COLOUR-RED
FAV BOOK-ONE CHILD BY TOREY HAYDEN
FAV FILM-BEACHES
FAV BAND-AT THE MOMENT THE FRAY/AUGUSTANA
FAV PROG-ONE TREE HILL
FAV PLACE-MY BED
FAV MEMORY-ME, MUM, PAULA N LEWIS ON HOLZ WIV KITE LOL
FAV PERSON-MY LITTO SIS
FAV CELEB-SJP OR HILARIE BURTON
FAV FOOD-PASTA
COKE OR PEPSI-PEPSI
CATS OR DOGS-CATS
MUSICOR TV-MUSIC
LAST KISS-KAITE MILLAR
LAST CRUSH-LOUISE WATERS
LAST BOYFRIEND-STEVEN FRYE
LAST GIRLFRIEND-VICKI KEENEN
LAST HEARTBREAK-A FRIENDS LIE
LAST MEMORY-LUNCH WIV VON AND CHEERING HER UP
LAST WEDDING-LIZ AND MARTINS
LAST FUNERAL-VICKI'S
LAST PHONE-SAMSUNG E350 I THINK
LAST HOLIDAY- BERRICK LAST MONTH
LAST THING EATEN-M&MS
LAST THING DRANK-GINGER BEER
LAST TIME CRIED-CUPLE OF DAYS AGO
LAST TIME LAUGHED-TONIGHT
LAST FILM WATCHED-STEP UP
LAST OUTFIT WOREN-MY PJ'S
LAST PERSON HUGGED-WEE RICHY
LAST PERSON WHO SAID I LOVE YOU TO ME-WEE LAURA SWEENEY
LAST PERSON I SIAD I LOVE YOU TO-PAULA
LAST TIME HURT-LAST WEEK
LAST TIME DISAPPOINTED-TONIGHT
LAST SONG I LISTENED TO-NEVER AGAIN BY KELLY CLARKSON
LAST PROGRAMME I SEEN-OTH
LAST TIME WORKING-YESTERDAY 4-11
ANY PETS-2 CATS AND 3 HAMSTERS
NAMES-MR.WRIGGLYBUTT, PRINCESS ROBY, OCTOBER DUST, MOLLY AND SOOTY
FAV DAY OF WEEK-FRIDAY
BOOK CURRENTLY READING-BEAUTIFUL CHILD BY TOREY HAYDEN
LAST POEM-LET ME BREATH
TEN PEOPLE I LOVE MOST:
1.Paula my litto sister
2.My mum
3.Mark my brother
4.Laura my best friend
5.Laura my other best friend
6.Louise my ex
7.My Gran
8.Kaite my almost girlfriend
9.Tj my new friend
10.Debbie,Grace and Shona
Five things in my head right now:
1."We love to boogie"
2."Naked mama"
3."If you're happy and you know it clap your hands"
4."This isn't just food this is M&S food"
5."BOOOOOOOOOOOObies"
Five things I couldn't live without:
1.Paula
2.Lungs
3.Air to fill my lungs
4.My heart
5.My brain...
Five things I want right now: (realistically)
1.The tv pages
2.Battery's for my mp3 player
3.Black handcuffs
4.Good news
5.A reply to my text
Five things to do before I die:
1.To walk to work naked
2.To be on the news for something really stupid but funny
3.To write a book
4.To design my own headstone
5.To die laughing
One wish:that all this meant something to someone reading, even if just one person relates or smiles then it was worth getting finger cramp x.x.x.x
"People ask questions
Because they want to know the answer
I ask questions
Already knowing the answerBecause I don't understand"
"I can't find the words
To describe the pain"
True friendship
Is seen through the heart
Not the eyes
"GOODBYE'S NEVER PAINFUL, UNLESS YOU'RE NEVER GOING TO SAY HELLO AGAIN......"
You didn't ask...but I'll tell anyways:
-I have been sexually abused by a male
-I have been sexually abused by a female
-I have been raped
-I have had an abortion
-I have had a miscarrage
-I have been a self harmer
-I have taken an overdose
-I have taken drugs
-I have been blind drunk
-I have see someone being born
-I have seen someone die
-I have seen someone close to me hurt
-I have hurt someone close to me
-I have been to a wedding
-I have been to a funeral
-I have made mistakes
-I have learnt from mistakes
-I have stabbed someone
-I have been stabbed
-I have shoplifted
-I have been nasty
-I have been bullied
-I have become a bully
-I have been beaten
-I been spiteful
-I have been jealous
-I have been hateful
-I have been ashamed
-I have been hurt
-I've kissed a male
-I've kissed a female
-I've slept with a male
-I've slept with a female
-I've broken a girls heart
-She's broken mine
-I've cheated with a girl
-I've been cheated on by a guy
-I've been cheated on my a girl
I'VE BEEN TO HELL...AND I'VE BEEN BACK
Thankies to everyone here on AP who has ever been a friend who welcomed me with open arms and has stopped by my page now and again to see how I am. Love you all xox
Abt me:
I am:exhausted
I hurt:because of you
I love:all the wrong people
I hate:what I don't let you see
I fear:what you could do
I regret:not telling you I love you earlier
I hope:you can be happy
I hear:things you haven't said yet
I crave:what I don't have
I cry:when I lose control of my feelings
I care
or everyoneI always
uck it up eventuallyI long:to have what I need
I feel:alone
I listen:but I'm never heard
I hide:inside myself when I'm scared of what you could see
I drive:myself mad
I sing:to cheer people up
I dance:to feel good
I write:when I need to talk
I play:with my hair when something's on my mind
I miss:you when you're gone
I search
or answersI learn:my lesson too late
I feel:every emotion possible
I know:that I'm wrong but try to be right
I say:sorry way too much
I succeed:but make a mess of it
I fail:because I gave up too quickly
I dream
f things I wantI sleep:when I can't keep my eyes open anymore
I wonder:what will happen to us
I want:what we used to have
I worry:that you're really leaving me
I have:no hope left
I give:everything and recieve nothing
I fight:but rarely win
I wait
or too long and lose what I was going afterI need:to be loved
I think
ar too muchI sadden:when you cry
I kill:myself in my dreams
I break:my own heart by breaking yours
I see:what you can't say in your eyes
I smell:through my nose
I taste:with my tongue
I work
or acceptance and respectI remember:things you told my years ago
I hold:you close to my heart
I pray:just not in the way you want me too
I walk:away when the hurt becomes too much
I read:books that question my thoughts
I burn:when I lose control of my thoughts
I breathe:to stay alive
I touch
n things butbdon't finish themI said:nothing when I should have talked
I have:your friendship but I'm not sure I want it
I fall:everytime you let me go
I live:every day but...
I die:every night!
NAME-GEMMA
AGE-19
BIRTHDAY-24/05/1988
BIRTH PLACE-GLASGOW SCOTLAND
MOTHERS NAME-SHARON
FATHERS NAME-JAMES
EYE COLOUR-BLUE
HAIR COLOUR-BRUNETTE BUT DYED RED
PIERCINGS-13
WHERE-8EARS, 2LIPS, EYEBROW, NECK AND NIPPLE
TATTOOS-JUST 1
STEREOTYPE-MYSELF
FAV COLOUR-RED
FAV BOOK-ONE CHILD BY TOREY HAYDEN
FAV FILM-BEACHES
FAV BAND-AT THE MOMENT THE FRAY/AUGUSTANA
FAV PROG-ONE TREE HILL
FAV PLACE-MY BED
FAV MEMORY-ME, MUM, PAULA N LEWIS ON HOLZ WIV KITE LOL
FAV PERSON-MY LITTO SIS
FAV CELEB-SJP OR HILARIE BURTON
FAV FOOD-PASTA
COKE OR PEPSI-PEPSI
CATS OR DOGS-CATS
MUSICOR TV-MUSIC
LAST KISS-KAITE MILLAR
LAST CRUSH-LOUISE WATERS
LAST BOYFRIEND-STEVEN FRYE
LAST GIRLFRIEND-VICKI KEENEN
LAST HEARTBREAK-A FRIENDS LIE
LAST MEMORY-LUNCH WIV VON AND CHEERING HER UP
LAST WEDDING-LIZ AND MARTINS
LAST FUNERAL-VICKI'S
LAST PHONE-SAMSUNG E350 I THINK
LAST HOLIDAY- BERRICK LAST MONTH
LAST THING EATEN-M&MS
LAST THING DRANK-GINGER BEER
LAST TIME CRIED-CUPLE OF DAYS AGO
LAST TIME LAUGHED-TONIGHT
LAST FILM WATCHED-STEP UP
LAST OUTFIT WOREN-MY PJ'S
LAST PERSON HUGGED-WEE RICHY
LAST PERSON WHO SAID I LOVE YOU TO ME-WEE LAURA SWEENEY
LAST PERSON I SIAD I LOVE YOU TO-PAULA
LAST TIME HURT-LAST WEEK
LAST TIME DISAPPOINTED-TONIGHT
LAST SONG I LISTENED TO-NEVER AGAIN BY KELLY CLARKSON
LAST PROGRAMME I SEEN-OTH
LAST TIME WORKING-YESTERDAY 4-11
ANY PETS-2 CATS AND 3 HAMSTERS
NAMES-MR.WRIGGLYBUTT, PRINCESS ROBY, OCTOBER DUST, MOLLY AND SOOTY
FAV DAY OF WEEK-FRIDAY
BOOK CURRENTLY READING-BEAUTIFUL CHILD BY TOREY HAYDEN
LAST POEM-LET ME BREATH
TEN PEOPLE I LOVE MOST:
1.Paula my litto sister
2.My mum
3.Mark my brother
4.Laura my best friend
5.Laura my other best friend
6.Louise my ex
7.My Gran
8.Kaite my almost girlfriend
9.Tj my new friend
10.Debbie,Grace and Shona
Five things in my head right now:
1."We love to boogie"
2."Naked mama"
3."If you're happy and you know it clap your hands"
4."This isn't just food this is M&S food"
5."BOOOOOOOOOOOObies"
Five things I couldn't live without:
1.Paula
2.Lungs
3.Air to fill my lungs
4.My heart
5.My brain...
Five things I want right now: (realistically)
1.The tv pages
2.Battery's for my mp3 player
3.Black handcuffs
4.Good news
5.A reply to my text
Five things to do before I die:
1.To walk to work naked
2.To be on the news for something really stupid but funny
3.To write a book
4.To design my own headstone
5.To die laughing
One wish:that all this meant something to someone reading, even if just one person relates or smiles then it was worth getting finger cramp x.x.x.x
"People ask questions
Because they want to know the answer
I ask questions
Already knowing the answerBecause I don't understand"
"I can't find the words
To describe the pain"
True friendship
Is seen through the heart
Not the eyes
"GOODBYE'S NEVER PAINFUL, UNLESS YOU'RE NEVER GOING TO SAY HELLO AGAIN......"
You didn't ask...but I'll tell anyways:
-I have been sexually abused by a male
-I have been sexually abused by a female
-I have been raped
-I have had an abortion
-I have had a miscarrage
-I have been a self harmer
-I have taken an overdose
-I have taken drugs
-I have been blind drunk
-I have see someone being born
-I have seen someone die
-I have seen someone close to me hurt
-I have hurt someone close to me
-I have been to a wedding
-I have been to a funeral
-I have made mistakes
-I have learnt from mistakes
-I have stabbed someone
-I have been stabbed
-I have shoplifted
-I have been nasty
-I have been bullied
-I have become a bully
-I have been beaten
-I been spiteful
-I have been jealous
-I have been hateful
-I have been ashamed
-I have been hurt
-I've kissed a male
-I've kissed a female
-I've slept with a male
-I've slept with a female
-I've broken a girls heart
-She's broken mine
-I've cheated with a girl
-I've been cheated on by a guy
-I've been cheated on my a girl
I'VE BEEN TO HELL...AND I'VE BEEN BACK
Thankies to everyone here on AP who has ever been a friend who welcomed me with open arms and has stopped by my page now and again to see how I am. Love you all xox
- Last seen 1 day ago. Member since February 25, 2006.
- I'm a obsidian idea poet for 647 comments.
- My mood is , and quote is -I AM WAT U WANT....U R WAT I NEED-.
- I am a 19 year old girl (United Kingdom)
- When I'm not writing, I'm trying to survive.
- I am in the groups Bi Gurls, Cutters Digest, Cutting Writers, GLBTeens, Raped and Abused, Razors and Raindrops, Sapphos, The Sexiest Women of AP, cutters and bleeders, scars can heal
- I have 647 comments, 1 contest, 1 column
My Poetry
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I cannot stop these tears I'm crying / As I can't control my hurt / Holding my heart in my hands / Held so tightly to my chest / Fearing the damage shattering could do / To my last ounce of sanity / Anxiety takes14 lines, 2 comments, June 23, 2007
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Pick apart the seams / And see what's underneath / The blood won't run forever / A Black princess amoung these queens / I once wore a crown made of gold / With jewels and diamonds galore / I once owned a hors
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Twinkle twinkle / My little angel / My little star / Mummy's dancing with angels / And the demons take over your head / It's such a sad story to read / That you have a burden this big / When so young and i33 lines, June 18, 2007
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This is a pile of pish but it makes sense in my head...I've not written in ages and I needed to get a few thoughts down
