ElusiveStar• Show poetry

(Updated June, 2009)

Wow. That's all I can say right now is wow...

In the last 5 years so much has happened to me. When I was 14/15 I was in a really dark place. I thought there was nothing left in this world for me. Someone took the time to love me and help me through all my hardships. I opened up and expressed myself and I was rewarded with Joy. I found God. I had thought that He deserted me through the many years of pain and suffering that I endured. But He never did, He was there the whole time rooting for me. He knew that one day I would open my eyes and see Him and all that the world had to offer me. It wasn't easy but I did it. I started seeing the world from a different perspective and to this day that perspective has not changed. It was blurry at some points but I never lost sight of what was ahead.

I escaped an abusive past. But then I found someone who I thought was my knight in shining armor, but he wasn't. It was a very hard part of my life. God gave me a beautiful daughter out of that horrible abusive situation. I was confused and thought that he would change but he never did.

I held my head high and tried to work with him, I didn't love him anymore but my daughter did, she didn't care that he rarely wanted to spend any time with her, she didn't care that he basically never wanted to read to her, or talk to her, or even look at her. She only cared when he actually did do those things. She was a baby and she tried so hard to fight for his attention, his affection but he didn't care. Things got worse and I realized that was it, things needed to change and I couldn't wait for that to happen, I had to make the change, I had to be the change. I left and I never looked back.

My daughter is the one thing in my life that has given me nothing but pure happiness and joy other than the Lord. Ever since the day she was born I've done everything for her. She is my world and no matter what life throws at me I will make sure to always do my absolute best for her. I love that little girl with every ounce of myself. I will never stop fighting for her. I will never stop loving her. God has thrown so many struggles my way this last couple years but I have overcame every single one. I am strong. I have faith. I have love. Now I know that no matter what God will always be there. He has a plan for us all. I know that no matter what tests are thrown at me I won't falter, I won't go back to that dark place I once was in.

When I was 15 I thought there was nothing left for me. Ever since I found God again, I know that no matter what there will never be nothing left for me. I want to thank everyone who's commented on my previous writes. I do want to add that a lot of the things I wrote were mainly based off of true event/thoughts/feelings. But there are many things in my writes that were changed and added and switched around. Thank you all for your time. I plan on starting to write again. When the words come crashing down on me I will let it out to share with you. Right now all I feel is a jumble of happiness and its so hard to organize... When I have the time to sift through it all and organize it to share with you the wonderful feelings I have every day..... you'll see it.

My Daughter is
2 years, 5 months, and 1 day old today.

I live in Washington and have some really awesome friends.

They mean the world to me



My Poetry:


I don't see my poetry as that great compared to all the poems I have seen.

But I've been told that my poems are good.

I'll let you all be the judge of that.

Any opinions or advice that you could give to improve my writing will be appreciated.

Don't be afraid to criticize my poems because that's what I want.

I want to know what I'm doing wrong or what I can do to make it better.

I know I don't have that much talent but it's something I like to do and read.

I wish I could be great at it but it's just something to pass the time and organize my feelings in something other than spontaneous outbursts of emotional writes.


Thanks for visiting my page

God Bless Always

~Nikki~